YAHOO LIVEBLOGS HAVE UNSEEN, UNKNOWABLE POWERS
So, during the Yahoo(!) liveblog last night, a running gag of sorts crept in re: Willy Korn, the redshirt freshman QB whom many Clemson fans see as the answer to their stagnant mosquito pond of an offense. The game was excruciatingly, eye-gougingly awful for most of four quarters, and in the name of a) seeing something, anything interesting happen, and b) utter delirium, we got it into our heads that invoking the name of Willy Korn, over and over again, could somehow make him just appear on the field, like the Candyman. This rapidly spiraled out of control, of course, leading to updates like “First down Wake inside the Clemson 25. (Willy Korn)”, and at the end of the night we shut our laptops, Kornless, dejected, and a little dumber for what we’d just watched.
Redshirt freshman Willy Korn will replace senior Cullen Harper as Clemson’s starting quarterback, coach Tommy Bowden announced Friday. Korn, one of the highest-touted quarterback recruits out of South Carolina’s Byrnes High two years ago, will be behind center next Saturday when Clemson (3-3) plays Georgia Tech.
The report adds that “Bowden also sighted Korn’s mobility”, which we’re assuming is a typo, since Tommy Bowden, for all his qualities, is not a hunter. No, if anything, he’s a hunting dog: sad-eyed, inbred, and born without opposable thumbs. What you really need to take away from the story, however, is WE HAVE POWERS. Empirical proof that The Secret is for bitches, comrades—invoke Willy Korn, and all things are possible. (Willy Korn)









1
Ted says:
Michael Johnson and Daryl Richard have also sighted Willy Korn.
October 10th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
2
oc phil says:
Bird, bird, bird,
Bird is the word
October 10th, 2008 at 3:11 pm
3
Magic Hobo says:
I suspect that Block-C (formerly Danny Ford is God) is mildly responsible for the Korntastic Korngasm due to their EXTREME KORN REPORT (warning: viewing without goggles has been known to cause EXTREMELY AWESOME mild retinal damage)
October 10th, 2008 at 3:15 pm
4
Holly says:
I would like to have the EXTREME KORN REPORT framed. Outstanding.
October 10th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
5
brougham says:
During the one Clemson game I attended last year (my school of choice got thrashed), people in the stands were muttering to each other that coach should really put in Korn.
His entry with the offense was greeted with the happiest cheers I heard all day. Even the bug-lites in the tiger eyes shone a little brighter. Korn has awaken!
October 10th, 2008 at 3:21 pm
6
Mr. Pelican Pants says:
Tommy start Korn, and I dont care..
Tommy start Korn, and I dont care…
Tommy start Korn, and I dont caaaarrrrrreee….
The coach is going awaaaayyyy…..
October 10th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
7
Geori says:
This is the korniest post I’ve read in awhile. Why can’t they just fire Tommy Bowden today and put him out of his misery.
October 10th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
8
TD Maker says:
Boom Boom would’ve just knocked Harper off the field, maybe once TB gets fired they’ll have an EXTREMEBOOMREPORT
October 10th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
9
Will (the other one) says:
I’ve got powers too…uh…political powers!
October 10th, 2008 at 4:08 pm
10
Chili says:
EKR called it in August.
http://www.block-c.com/2008/08/29/preseason-extreme-korn-report/
October 10th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
11
allaha says:
“one of the highest-touted quarterback recruits out of South Carolina’s Byrnes High two years ago” . . . can’t Clemson at least aspire to THE highest touted quarterback recruit out of SC’s Byrnes High?
BTW, are Spiller and Davis over-rated, or is Bowden magnificently incompetent in his use of them?
October 10th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
12
Chili says:
@11
Poorly worded quote for sure.
And Bowden is just magnificently incompetent in his use of Davis & Spiller, as is OC Rob Spence, who in response to the Maryland loss said he “prayed a lot” and after the Wake Forest game said he “didn’t understand what’s going on, okay?”
Mmm… fantastic.
October 10th, 2008 at 6:37 pm
13
yoyofutbawl says:
12
The REAL area of incompetence lies in the OL. How in the hell can a school that gets top notch recruits have such a pathetic OL? Clempson should have at least 8-9 solid, experienced OLs available every year.
Gawga’s had as many OL injuries and they can still pass block and open holes.
October 11th, 2008 at 5:47 am
14
Chili says:
@13
I am in total agreement with you there. There are some good young o-line guys, but baptism by fire clearly hasn’t been fruitful for them.
October 11th, 2008 at 7:31 am