YAHOO LIVEBLOGS HAVE UNSEEN, UNKNOWABLE POWERS

by Holly Anderson on Oct 10, 2008 4:03 PM EDT

So, during the Yahoo(!) liveblog last night, a running gag of sorts crept in re: Willy Korn, the redshirt freshman QB whom many Clemson fans see as the answer to their stagnant mosquito pond of an offense. The game was excruciatingly, eye-gougingly awful for most of four quarters, and in the name of a) seeing something, anything interesting happen, and b) utter delirium, we got it into our heads that invoking the name of Willy Korn, over and over again, could somehow make him just appear on the field, like the Candyman. This rapidly spiraled out of control, of course, leading to updates like "First down Wake inside the Clemson 25. (Willy Korn)", and at the end of the night we shut our laptops, Kornless, dejected, and a little dumber for what we'd just watched.

Today:

Redshirt freshman Willy Korn will replace senior Cullen Harper as Clemson's starting quarterback, coach Tommy Bowden announced Friday. Korn, one of the highest-touted quarterback recruits out of South Carolina's Byrnes High two years ago, will be behind center next Saturday when Clemson (3-3) plays Georgia Tech.

The report adds that "Bowden also sighted Korn's mobility", which we're assuming is a typo, since Tommy Bowden, for all his qualities, is not a hunter. No, if anything, he's a hunting dog: sad-eyed, inbred, and born without opposable thumbs. What you really need to take away from the story, however, is WE HAVE POWERS. Empirical proof that The Secret is for bitches, comrades---invoke Willy Korn, and all things are possible. (Willy Korn)

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Michael Johnson and Daryl Richard have also sighted Willy Korn.

by Ted on Oct 10, 2008 4:06 PM EDT reply actions

Bird, bird, bird,

Bird is the word

by oc phil on Oct 10, 2008 4:11 PM EDT reply actions

I suspect that Block-C (formerly Danny Ford is God) is mildly responsible for the Korntastic Korngasm due to their EXTREME KORN REPORT (warning: viewing without goggles has been known to cause EXTREMELY AWESOME mild retinal damage)

by Magic Hobo on Oct 10, 2008 4:15 PM EDT reply actions

I would like to have the EXTREME KORN REPORT framed. Outstanding.

by Holly on Oct 10, 2008 4:20 PM EDT reply actions

During the one Clemson game I attended last year (my school of choice got thrashed), people in the stands were muttering to each other that coach should really put in Korn.

His entry with the offense was greeted with the happiest cheers I heard all day. Even the bug-lites in the tiger eyes shone a little brighter. Korn has awaken!

by brougham on Oct 10, 2008 4:21 PM EDT reply actions

Tommy start Korn, and I dont care..
Tommy start Korn, and I dont care…
Tommy start Korn, and I dont caaaarrrrrreee….
The coach is going awaaaayyyy…..

by Mr. Pelican Pants on Oct 10, 2008 4:49 PM EDT reply actions

This is the korniest post I’ve read in awhile. Why can’t they just fire Tommy Bowden today and put him out of his misery.

by Geori on Oct 10, 2008 4:49 PM EDT reply actions

Boom Boom would’ve just knocked Harper off the field, maybe once TB gets fired they’ll have an EXTREMEBOOMREPORT

by TD Maker on Oct 10, 2008 4:49 PM EDT reply actions

I’ve got powers too…uh…political powers!

by Will (the other one) on Oct 10, 2008 5:08 PM EDT reply actions

EKR called it in August.
http://www.block-c.com/2008/08/29/preseason-extreme-korn-report/

by Chili on Oct 10, 2008 5:53 PM EDT reply actions

“one of the highest-touted quarterback recruits out of South Carolinas Byrnes High two years ago” . . . can’t Clemson at least aspire to THE highest touted quarterback recruit out of SC’s Byrnes High?

BTW, are Spiller and Davis over-rated, or is Bowden magnificently incompetent in his use of them?

by allaha on Oct 10, 2008 6:23 PM EDT reply actions

@11
Poorly worded quote for sure.
And Bowden is just magnificently incompetent in his use of Davis & Spiller, as is OC Rob Spence, who in response to the Maryland loss said he “prayed a lot” and after the Wake Forest game said he “didn’t understand what’s going on, okay?”

Mmm… fantastic.

by Chili on Oct 10, 2008 7:37 PM EDT reply actions

The REAL area of incompetence lies in the OL. How in the hell can a school that gets top notch recruits have such a pathetic OL? Clempson should have at least 8-9 solid, experienced OLs available every year.

Gawga’s had as many OL injuries and they can still pass block and open holes.

by yoyofutbawl on Oct 11, 2008 6:47 AM EDT reply actions