HANG ON, POOPY
Ohio State seems to be doing what good teams do after getting their heads kicked in early: regrouping, finding their rhythm, retooling with the extremely un-gay Buckeye Pistol formation. (Fullback! GRRR!!!), and otherwise recovering nicely for a stretch run.

Gosh almighty, that’s pungent. Does someone need to dot an ‘i’ in here?
It’s your standard, level-headed Tressel performance, though there’s just some shit a football coach can’t predict or take care of, like say, the shits. OL Steve Rehring, who was supposed to rotate in and see spot duty after missing two games to injury, had a problem with false starts no amount of coaching or scheming could prevent.
“He missed an 11-play drive,” Tressel said. “He had to go to the restroom, and so he probably would have played closer to half of the time, but he missed an 11 and then he missed like a 10 (play drive).”
That’s quite a restroom break.
“Well, there were multiple.”
Hopefully, Rehring didn’t blow a Power O-ring, and will be prepared to assume his proper duties blocking for Mark May’s least favorite player in the universe, Terrelle Pryor. It’s always nice to know that Tressel likes a good shit joke, that Skyline Chili is still fulfilling its role as human Dran-o, and that the Buckeyes are keeping the uncontrollable pants-crapping to the sidelines, and not letting it spread to the field.









1
Crabapple Buck says:
The last time they had the shits was January 8. At least this time it was off the field.
Terrelle Pryor will be inducing the trots on opposing defenses for the next 21/2 to 3 1/2 years.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:10 am
2
Schnitzengruben says:
Couldn’t he have just pulled up the nearest Coleman and dropped the kids off right there?
October 8th, 2008 at 10:15 am
3
DevilGrad says:
Does OSU have an exchange program with Georgetown?
October 8th, 2008 at 10:17 am
4
CincySooner says:
“…human Drain-O…”
I laughed to the point of tears.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:18 am
5
blon says:
On my first trip to Ohio, some friends insisted that I try Skyline Chili. Chili is a delicacy in Texas, so they were under the delusion that I would find that stuff palatable.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:25 am
6
DevilGrad says:
Re #4: All great comedy is born from painful truth.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:25 am
7
yoyofutbawl says:
Wasn’t there an ice chest available on the sideline?
October 8th, 2008 at 10:32 am
8
WarCardinals says:
The real question is why isn’t he playing for Penn State (the home of leaving football games to take a slam)?
October 8th, 2008 at 10:37 am
9
Noel Devine's Gold Teef says:
Coach stew had the same problem during the Colorado game, but he put a clamp on it:
http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/billstewartomgeyes_thumb.jpg
October 8th, 2008 at 10:37 am
10
spencer096 says:
no. 5
skyline is a Cincy thing…and it’s downright disgusting.
on a trip to cincy when i was playing HS football, on the way home the entire team was given skyline before a 4 hour bus ride home.
thank god nobody lit a match.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:38 am
11
beast in 'bama says:
Tressel needs to give Mark Schlereth a call.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:43 am
12
Ry says:
Well it’s good to see that they’re making it to the restroom now. Seeing as the whole team shit themself against USC.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:44 am
13
Gen. Stoopnagle says:
As predictable as Arizona State losing to a half-decent team:
Ohio State will be in the MNC mix by the end of the year. They will be the proverbial “team-playing-the-best-ball-right-now” and the pundits led by Sub-Commandante Wayne will explain away the USC loss with missing Beanies.
Colbert Called It.
[drop balloons]
October 8th, 2008 at 10:49 am
14
osujeff says:
I suppose after this we can’t make fun of Joe’OppsICrappedMyPants’Pa anymore.
October 8th, 2008 at 10:51 am
15
justanotherbuckeye says:
Orson,
When did this become a Buckeye blog?
October 8th, 2008 at 10:57 am
16
plastic paddy says:
reduntent reply
October 8th, 2008 at 11:12 am
17
Raj says:
If you wanted a Joe Paterno reference, you could just have quoted Alex Boone:
“I don’t know why he’s running, maybe he forgot his mouthgaurd or something. Somebody said he had to go to the bathroom. I said ‘What? Who leaves a football game to go to the bathroom? That’s Joe Paterno stuff,’” Boone said.
October 8th, 2008 at 11:52 am
18
Heyberto says:
Not hard when you play mostly cupcakes who don’t beat you up week in, week out. Having time to prepare against teams like Wisconson is a lot easier. If they beat Penn State, then they will have done something.. but I don’t see that happening.
October 8th, 2008 at 11:54 am
19
Touchdown74 says:
#7…I AM IN TEARS!!!!
The guy must have had a Blackberry. I know my boss scratches his head when I take 30 minute craps myself. But that damn “Crackberry” keeps me busy while I am restocking the pond with brownfish.
October 8th, 2008 at 11:56 am
20
NVBlueWolf says:
Hmm, the Buckeye Pistol formation sounds exactly like the same pistol formation that Nevada developed a few years ago. Nice to see that it’s catching on in the Big 10. It seems to be a pretty damn effective offense with a speedy QB.
October 8th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
21
NVBlueWolf says:
@20…..That’s because we borrowed it from you and tweaked it slightly. No one from OSU is claiming credit for inventing the pistol formation.
October 8th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
22
sb says:
Bathroom humor and OSU…an irresistible combination…
October 8th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
23
OhioDawg says:
Prick. That’s the word I’m looking for. Tressel just looks like a prick.
October 8th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
24
CincySooner says:
Re: #5 and #10
Skyline is a meat-sauce.
Skyline is not chili, and I refuse to refer to it as such.
There are many reasons to not call it chili:
1) If you can’t stick a spoon in it, let go, and have the spoon stay standing, then it isn’t chili.
2) If you pour it over spaghetti, let it sit for five minutes, and discover that half of the meat has fallen BETWEEN the noodles, then it isn’t chili
3) If you have to serve it over spaghetti or on a hot dog before it starts to taste good, then it isn’t chili.
So long as you don’t think of it as “chili” then it can be very tasty. Tasty enough to rival Taco Bell as the late-night drunk-food location of choice.
And never, never, NEVER order it by itself in a bowl.
October 8th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
25
cincyjacket says:
Skyline is not chili, but it is quite delicious, and never gave me the runs. If you. Are new to it, stick with the cheese coneys.
October 8th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
26
TheMightyErik says:
@23 – Yeah, or a ‘relocated’ catholic priest
@24 – Totally agree. I liked GoldStar better anyway when was in Ohio.
Q – Why do they call Ohio ‘The Heart of it All?”
A – Because the brain ain’t there
(Sorry… just love cheapshot’n Buckeyes)
October 8th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
27
croc says:
I’m sure Mrs.Tressel appreciates the bacon strips in Jimmy’s pants, after a good game. Nice.
October 8th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
28
Innocent Bystander says:
Brilliant headline. Took me a few seconds, though.
October 8th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
29
poguemahone says:
Everyone around Buckeye nation thinks that picture of Tress and the 2006 offensive line is really badass and it isn’t. Barton (74) looks like he’s about to puke, Datish (behind Barton) looks like the dude pissing himself in Gladiator, Rehring (center) is probably taking a shit mid-shot, and Boone looks very “you got a purty mouth”.
And Tress just has a way of looking like something is stuck up his butt most of the time, anyway. I much prefer Beanie running across Michigan’s endzone, crazy beard and mistaken rose in tow for badass Buckeye imagery. It doesn’t hurt that he’s the only player I’d actually call a badass on the Buckeyes’ current team.
October 8th, 2008 at 4:39 pm
30
db says:
Golden.
I really wish Rehring would have just shit his pants while playing, then refused to leave the field. I also wish that he would have told everyone, so the booth would have heard about it and been forced to make awkward references to it.
As an aside, Skyline fuckin’ rocks.
October 8th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
31
MCab says:
When I was playing rugby, I was advised to not eat the day of a match. Sure enough, I played better, for psychological and biological reasons.
October 8th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
32
Steve says:
Don’t confuse Skyline Paste with actual chili. Although it is in fact good for ‘clearing up your schedule’ it cannot be reasonbly be characterized with food or anything of the like. -same goes for Gold Star.
Here an easy nutritional map to follow while in the Buckeye State.
Central to South West Ohio = Hardy German dishes: sausage, krout, stuffed peppers
Northern Ohio = Hardy Polish dishes: sausage, sour kraut, perogies
Southeast Ohio = tree bark
October 9th, 2008 at 7:49 am
33
tom says:
When we went to Cincinnati to play rugby, the head was pretty busy before the match, heard from a stall:
“jees, I don’t remember eating hay last night with my chili”
Thanks Skyline
October 9th, 2008 at 4:35 pm