Blogtoberfest! Because your attention span needs to be shortened.

Bout to turn game into the Quan Cosby Show. For the moment, advantage Texas:

It’s never to early to begin Christmas shopping. Tennessee fans and ideas: they have them.

[REDACTED.] Brian’s breaking down the film of Michigan’s beating by Illinois, and the evidence looks damning, especially when the conclusion is that [NAME REDACTED] outcoached RichRod.

They don’t step on the lines in Belle Glade. Lieutenant Winslow can find a spectacular moment of athleticism in even the most stinging of close losses to Florida State. Those lines are on fire. You can’t step on them. GO.

It’s not that different, except for the lack of scoring. SEC defenses are easy and simple, according to Dave Clawson. The problem comes with scoring on them, which is surprisingly required in the job description. He’s working on that, we swear.

The playbook has been reduced to a convenient pamphlet for you. Tony Franklin continues to pare down the playbook, which is now a fake punt, one zone stretch play, and a bubble screen.

Four losses to unranked opponents. Florida’s lost four games to unranked opponents under Urban Meyer. Les Miles at LSU? One. Blutarsky wonders why the common perception is that Meyer is a better coach than Miles, but the answer’s simple to the misanthrope: normal, average people find interesting people with a penchant for the high side of risk management frightening and disturbing, much in the same way that many people don’t eat at Taco Bell because “it’s too spicy.” Miles is no Chalupa Barn of a coach, but that’s the point exactly: Miles isn’t even that wacky, but instead understands the relative points value on 4th and 1. Math + unconventional thinking= nervous monkeys all around.