Comments on: EXCELLENCE IN MARKETING: HFCS BELT EDITION

By: dvilledawg

dvilledawg — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 22:08:04 +0000

#11– one thousand pop tart cocktails!

uga poptarts–10 scrumptious, impressive poptarts.

2 stinkers.

By: PJ from NU in SF

PJ from NU in SF — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 15:02:25 +0000

The Northwestern Pop-tart costs twice as much as the Michigan Pop-tart, is usually served frozen, and you really hope that brown filling is supposed to be chocolate.

By: kleph

kleph — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 01:52:17 +0000

the alabama pop tart is far better than anyone expected but doesn’t have time for this shit.

By: twogreattastes

twogreattastes — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 21:36:51 +0000

Props on the Happy Fun Ball reference, Unhappy Monkey.

By: Delicious Pundit

Delicious Pundit — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 21:31:35 +0000

I guess the Syracuse logo would be on a box of cupcakes.

By: TheMightyErik

TheMightyErik — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 20:09:43 +0000

A ‘taint’ on the box?

By: yoyofutbawl

yoyofutbawl — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 19:55:45 +0000

As HFCS is the State Food of Tennessee, I’m very amazed that big ol Orange T ain’t on the box.

By: blon

blon — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 19:46:58 +0000

UT grads do not eat pop tarts. Too low-brow.

I’m also sure that The University of Texas charged way too much money for Kellogg’s budget to license the logo use. We earn 8 million plus a year in marketing/merchandise.

By: The Song of Hiawatha Francisco

The Song of Hiawatha Francisco — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 19:18:19 +0000

The Notre Dame Pop Tart disappears if you turn it sideways.

By: Unhappy Monkey

Unhappy Monkey — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:56:52 +0000

Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly, and children under 10 should avoid prolonged exposure to Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts.

Caution: Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

Mike the Tiger Pop Tart contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

Do not use Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts on concrete.

Discontinue consumption of Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts if any of the following occurs:

itching
vertigo
dizziness
tingling in extremities
loss of balance or coordination
slurred speech
temporary blindness
profuse sweating
or heart palpitations.

If Mike the Tiger Pop Tart begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.

Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts may stick to certain types of skin.

When not in use, Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration. Failure to do so relieves the makers of Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts, Kellogg’s Products Incorporated, and its parent company, General Mills, of any and all liability.

Ingredients of Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts include an unknown glowing green substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.

Mike the Tiger Pop Tarts has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.

Do not taunt Mike the Tiger Pop Tart.

By: Flatlander

Flatlander — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:56:17 +0000

@ meatybob – the Nebraska version was considered unfit for public consumption.

I’m assuming when you eat the Oklahoma version, you cough it up at the very end. Just a hunch.

By: Der Schatten

Der Schatten — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:53:04 +0000

Maryland PopTarts. Open one box and there will be 10 inside. Another box may have 2. But, one thing’s for sure, you’ll always be glad when you’re done with them.

And, bonus fact, the box for the NC State poptarts tastes better than the pastries inside.

By: TheMightyErik

TheMightyErik — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:47:29 +0000

USC tarts – whole box is awesome except for one that tastes like someone shit a 3AM Denny’s meal into it

tOSU tarts – exclusive warning on box cautions consumers NOT to mix tOSU tarts with any tart not affiliated with the Big 10 or serious consequences to include violent gagging, choking and shitting of beds

F$U tart – has answers to numerous course exams printed on every wrapper

KU and Maryland tarts – contain about 7000 more calories per serving to sustain… nevermind… that’s just cold

By: ChasingMizzou

ChasingMizzou — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:33:04 +0000

That Mike the Tiger looks like it was eyeball’d on there by a bad tattoo artist.

By: Ted Ginn did Everythin'

Ted Ginn did Everythin' — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:27:07 +0000

The Maryland, Notre Dame and Kansas versions come with just the frosting.