EDSBSGPS: WHERE WE AT, WEEK 6

Skipping the early tilts to do yardwork. That grass isn’t going to aerate and seed itself.

Hitting the couch (and the bottle) about 3ish for ND/Stanford.

Getting dragged to a “Neighborhood Adults Party” at our clubhouse at 6…. whatever that means. Think there is “swinging” involved? Eh, free food and beer – what the hell. I’ll just get drunk and piss off the neighborhood.

Back around 10 for some sweet, sweet Pat Hill action.

another saturday night livechat, praychance? more fun than getting laid!

Oregon at USC via ESPN360.com, otherwise socializing. Could be worse.

After two weekends in the desert, no way am I leaving the comfort of home tomorrow, so yeah, we’ll have something going.

What the hell?

No worries. I’ll keep you all updated, whether you like it or not.

Please do, seriously. Way too many good games tomorrow for us to be watching every one we should.

Kinda know what you mean Holly, having experienced a Nor’easter in the Outer Banks o’ North Carolina last week.

My keister will be parked on the couch at home tomorry, absorbing every last ounce of CFB goodness!

tots + bourbon + football + blogging + Dawgs bye week – stress = perfect Saturday

After watching some stuff tonight, Early wakeup for some lawn mowing followed by a little ferterlizing and then I will be watching the GT Duke game on ESPNU (I think thats the channel) in the basement on the big-ass screen in the theater chairs with the surround sound. Then going to hit up some kind of pop warner charity related boose fest that my friends who used to play invited me too. Then maybe dribs and drabs wherever we go after that.

@ #1 = foolhardy to think it’s free. Either A) your wife chipped in unbeknownst to you, or B) you’ll pay somehow, oh be sure of that.

Following through with a time tested plan. First round of the club championship tomorrow morning. Lunch, then home for an afternoon orgy of football which will feature tOSU vs. Wisconsin in Camp Randall at 8:00 featuring Mike Patrick, Todd Blackledge and Holly Rowe. I will have an eye on all games, particularly those with $pecial interest.

You might even fence that tank in Gainesville. With the demise of “Tebow Smash” as a viable play call, Urban may be seeking an alternative. And its not like the Boosters don’t have the cash…

After being forced to watch last weeks Florida disaster from a bar (fun fact, I am now 0-5 in watching Florida games from bars since moving to the Charlotte area) and only reading about the rest of last weeks mayhem my plans this weekend involve nothing more complicated then sitting around watching football, drinking beer, and socializing with other like minded people online.

Is half of Neyland stadium still for sale for the NIU game?

Last I heard tickets were down to $10, which is cheaper than PPV. And it’s a night game. Because we’re going to need every advantage we can get against Northern Illinois. Not really kidding.

Like Orson, I will be attending the football match between the Blue Devils of Duke University and the Yellow Jackets of the Georgia institute of Technology.

I will also to remember to wear sunscreen b/c I still have some of the reverse raccoon/sunglasses tan on my face from the Mississippi State vs. Tech game 2 weeks ago.

From there I will subject myself to another Auburn game despite orders from my doctor/therapist/family/friends/and remote control(which is developing some good battle scars….oddly enough, from only when Auburn is on offense).

Late night nap games are the best, nothing better, cracking first beer at first kick-off, and realizing those last13 hours will never be returned!

Watching the 11:30 Daves, followed by:
considering catact surgery, followed by:
as much of Bama/KY as needed, followed by:
Hauling ass up I65 for Jason Isbell at 7pm at the Muscle Shoals Music Festival.

“cataract” (good thing Baby’s driving)

attending Cal-ASU game, suprised (not really) Holly doesn’t have it on her list, 12:30pt on ABC. Then walking to various bars in Berkeley to drink and watch whatever said bar has on at the time.

Dangit. Have to bail on the CFB day and there’s not even a wedding.
Softball practice in the morning.
Sneak in some football watching before test driving a Mini to replace the car that Heath S. totaled during Tennessee hate week.
Briefly home to sneak in some more football before the LA Burning Man party downtown. Will be wearing orange, and um, pink.

Watching the Arkansas/UF game on TiVo on Sunday. Doubt that I’ll record any of the other games.

Florida / Arkansas in the early afternoon for sure; the Raycom ACC game of the week is bizarrely BC / NC State, meaning if I watched that I’d be the only person dumb enough to watch it who’s not a fan of either team. (This is instead of GT/Duke; even the Raycom ACC affiliate can’t get their crappy Game of the Week right.) We’ll toss in a little Penn State / Purdue action for the hell of it.

The afternoon games will be …well, whatever’s on CBS this time around (Allabama / Kentucky?) along with FSU / Miami (time machine not provided) and Illinois / Michigan. Notre Dame / Stanford will get minimal attention unless Jimmah’s in form. Oklahoma / Baylor will be on when I remember it’s there (CSN, who knew you had such a love affair for the Big 12?).

Night games will be night games; hell, I don’t even know what I’ll be watching, but it looks like there are five games on here and minimal ACC involvement, I hope.

Mmmmm … I will be burninating a pile of leaves, limbs, and small wildlife whilst watching the Hogs lose a game; Hog fans are in reality mode now, and realize that five wins might be a strectch. In other news, in order to make life more comfortable for the incoming Florida faithful, the local retail shops have cleverly started selling jeans half-off, and by half-off, I mean all the denim below the knee …

How come Holly has to do all the heavy lifting? :-)

Also, I have not been able to view EDSBS using Internet Explorer for about 3 months.

I will be watching the UK/UA game. I will also be waiting for the other shoe to fall. This is the duty of every good Bama fan..we are now conditioned to great highs/soul crushing lows..So the Cats will probably cause me to join the Hog fan from above in immolation of small animals.

I will be walking precincts for about a half-dozen campaigns in the Sacramento area — and will miss all of the morning’s college football action. Shoot. Me. Now.

Taking the LSAT by the dawn’s early light, finishing in time to rush into the open arms of the Daves. I plan on being adequately lubricated by 3:30 ET for the ASU-Cal game, because I’ll need it considering Sparky’s anemic running game. Whatever else is on, yippee.

Coaching soccer for my son and other 5yr olds @ 9 am.
Down to the grove asap afterward for rebs vs cocks @ 1pm.
Not sure after that – prolly aub/vandy.

Hotty Toddy.

Taking the GREs at 12:30…..bastards didn’t have any seats in the 8:30 slot.

Then, getting home to catch most of Alabama/KY, Stanford/ND, and Illinois/UM.

Following that with some dinner supported by beers and the beginning of Auburn/Vandy and UConn/UNC. Then, turning my full attention to OSU/Wisconsin at 8, maybe following that with Hawaii/Fresno St.

Going to Indiana v Minnesota
Watching Kentucky v Alabama and Texas Tech v Kansas State
Ending the night by getting my head sheared to surprise a friend who just found out that her pain in the ass wasn’t from an increase in taxes.

Shedule altered by Honey Pie.

Early 3 Daves, Dook/GT, den UK/Bammer. Whatever is on before 7, and late.

VT/WF soccer live at 7 and in attendance .but they do be #1. AAAAAACKKK. But that is how da dog hunts.

TCOAN, I done do luv her. Orson, please forgive.

Dawn patrol. Wife reports for rehearsal at Cal’s Alumni Band Day, in Berkeley, at jackass o’clock in the morning. Probably leaning against the stump of a tree drinking from a flask at 7 AM and cursing the lack of access to the new HDTV showing College Gameday live from Nash Vegas.

At the conclusion of the game, probably borne on a stretcher into somebody’s house to see scores. Almost scared to actually watch the Dores for fear of a hex.

Probably shouldn’t still be awake.

Early games – will be watching OU vs. Baylor because I want to watch Robert Griffin with my own eyes, despite OU probably ripping him a new orifice. Flip to PSU-Purdue in the breaks. (Iowa vs. Michigan State is for masochists and Pam Ward lovers only — potentially in the same category.)

Nooners – Stanford-ND and (hopefully) FSU-Miami. (The TV system tells me it could be Illinois-Meechigan.) Will watch ASU-Cal if forced to by amount of suck, and will check on how much Rich Brooks thinks Alabama’s blowout lead is bullshit. Stop drinking at 2 to sober up for driving in about three hours.

3pm – Will catch the first half of Auburn-Vandy, puke from offensive putridity, flip to Texas-CU at 4, root for MAJESTIC BUFFALO against Colt McCoy’s double-barreled attack.

No late games this week for me. Party circuit starts at 5:30 in beach town 30 minutes away and then returns to the main drag for bar-hopping and co-worker’s going away.

Looks like a chilly start to the tailgate at GT – it’s not even 60 degrees here in Atlanta!

After watching the BEEEEEES at noon, it’s scrambling to get somewhere to watch the Navy-Air Farce game.

mmmmmmm…triple option goodness all day long

Starting Vay-Cay today. With LSU on the Bye Week, was supposed to be winging my way to Boulder yesterday to catch Texas-Colorado, but that was sadly not possible (stuff happening earlier in the year kiboshed it and LSU-Florida next week).

TV was out last week. With it finally repaired, will be getting back up to speed in a big way by watching a full slate of games:

Morning Session:

Rutty @ WFV
FLA @ Arky (The Three Daves – required viewing, plus I want to see the Gators play angry this week instead of next)
Joe Pa @ Purdue
Duke @ GT
Iowa @ Mich. St.
OK @ BAY

Afternoon Session:
  
FSU @ MIA (and hoping for a Sterger sighting)
ASU @ CAL
KY @ Bama (Uncles Verne and Gary – also required)
TT @ K-State
NEV @ ID (wondering what the cheerleaders will wear next, plus I need to see more of the Nevada “Pistol” formation to attempt to understand what Crowton’s trying to do at LSU)

Night Session:

Auburn @ Vandy
Texas @ CO (should have been at this game, dammit)
Oregon @ USC
tOSU @ Wisky
Mizzou @ NEB
Hawaii @ Fresno State
 
May also pop in and catch a few other games not mentioned and the Petit LeMans on Speed Channel.

On The Menu: Gettin’ my Sushi on tonight. You have not lived until you’ve experienced a Cajun Crawfish Roll. Will knosh on other varietals also.

ahhh, off to watch my engineers annihilate the hated dukish foes like so many relativistic particles in the LHC! in the resonant glories of nitrous-induced victory haze, several freshmen might be plucked from east campus, fed steroid shakes and forced to watch henry rollins exercise videos until they beg for death. these white devils of Duke and Duchies and Dukedoms and the heathen Nicolaitans (misled by of Krzyzewski and Gog and Magog, accursed before the LORD), claim cerulean hues but hark! just as the Scatterings of Compton rubify Atlanta’s sky duskwise, GT’s defense renders them red; meanwhile, coach Paul “NP != P for values of P equal to Paul Johnson, Bitch” Johnson plays the part of Professor STAFF, administering a grim lesson in Knowing One’s Role. GT by 14, w0000t! GO JACKETS, STING ’EM!

Georgetown-Colgate Football Game CXLD due to norovirus outbreak.

Okay, who at Leo’s Cafeteria didn’t wash their hands after doing #2 before returning to serve food?

In VA for a wedding, so I’ll be scouring my hotel channel lineup for the UF@ARK game until watching another friend give up the ghost at 4.

Up early because my sleep patterns are FUBAR, and thanking God that I do not have yardwork to distract me from the weekend’s most important task: fucking off.

Putting insomnia to good work by sorting out some piled-up paperwork while ignoring the siren song of the pregame shows. The only nice thing about the economy melting down is that I am no longer receiving 20 credit card applications every week.

With Northwestern and Louisville on bye, I lack a sense of urgency. When I get back from breakfast, I’ll settle down for a little Iowa @ State, followed by [TEAM REDACTED] at Le Grosse Chez. Brother Reefer Cargo is coming by somewhere in there to pick up his newly-defragmented (for the first time in four years) iMac, so offerings to the Gods shall be burnt. The question is: andouille or bratwurst?

Otherwise, I’m at a loose end; naps will be slotted into this demanding schedule as necessary. After that, I might roust myself to watch a little Bucky-on-Buckeye action. No question of who to root for here: When you say Wisconsin, you’ve said it all.

Visiting relatives in Pine Mountain, Ga. My coffee this morning had some kind of alcohol in it and there’s a liquor store in sight. Excepting Duke/Tech, I’m gonna keep tabs on my beloved ess eee see all day. I need to get prepared for what may be the first Vandy loss of my lifetime.

Georgia Tech vs Duke= S.A.T SPEEEED!!!!!

Is that Engineers vs Doctors? or Attorneys?

I will be watching,from work, Alabama vs KY….
I think its gonna be a yawner and I think we will sleepwalk thru this one. It seems we always seem to do off the wall stuff vs lesser opponents, like throw the damn ball every down….I am convinced it is not to give LSU edge as far as our tendencies…..If we can hold off the injury bug for the LSU and Auburn games, we may have a shot……

World Beer Festival from noon-4, stumble home, “watch” as much football as possible before passing out and waking up in time for OSU-Wisky

Watching Gameday at Vandy cracks me up. My favorite sign in the back of the crowd: “You people are blocking the library”.

A pox on Rick & Bubba.

Corso picks Durst as the game-changer.

PUNTING IS WINNING!!!

Neuheisel was right.

I’ll be watching my man crush, Pam Ward and hoping Javon Ringer has some gas still left in the tank.

I’ll also be flipping over to Gtech to watch a little flexbone.

If I have time for this shit, I’ll watch Terrence Cody cause a solar eclipse and make Rich Brooks OD on geritol.

I’ll then drink copious of Sangria (red drank) at Modesto her in the Lou, then skip the Ryan Adams concert to watch Chase Daniels run the “Swiss Timepiece”, aka the mizzou O.

Assuming they all cover, I’ll have drunk retard strength and retard swagger in time for EDSBS live.

Programmin’ note: Swindle’s at Georgia Tech and I’ve got some sort of death flu, so y’all on your own for the afternoon. We’ll be back for the night games. Play nice.*

*Do not play nice.

Never in my life did I think I would be watching Gameday at Vandy?

Get that midget Chesney off my fucking TV, ESPN.

Oh, no. No, no, no, Corso. NO.

I’m currently getting the normal Big Ten/Big East Buffet the Pittsburgh area has to offer. I’ll be sticking to mostly PSU/Purdue until about 2:30 (at which point another season begins… +100 cocktails to anyone else who will be watching the action from Sweeden). Anywho, I’ll be tuning into the alma mater via the interweb at 3:30 then head blindly into the night. Some drank is definitely in my immediate future considering I was the DD last evening.

Live from Northern Virginia, I have laryngitis, so I’m in the apartment watching the Gators with a Harris Teeter-supplied 12er of Magic Hat #9. Assorted crappy Big Televen games are also on, but I’m not paying much attention to those outside of bowl projections.

How is it possible that Michigan State and Iowa play every week at noon on the deuce?

Never mind…looks like there are a variety of non-Big Televen games to keep me occupied: KU-ISU, SUNJ-West Fuckin’ Virginia, BC-NCSU…Comcrap refuses to give us the U, so no Tech-Duke. Chizik’s boys just scored again. 14-0 Cyclones.

a shovel pass to James, finally some creative play calling inside the 5

Just returned from Gameday in Nashville. I have seen the Vanderbilt Commodore redneck bandwagon fan. This is the jaguar shark of the SEC ocean.

Godfrey, I want that comment framed. +many

So Paterno is in the booth ’cause he injured his knee trying to demonstrate an onside kick? I would pay money for that footage…and Godfrey, that was indeed the oddest collection of people and signage I have ever seen at a Gameday…freaky.

WTF?! Flag on Raycom for intermittent HD signal!

If any fool but me cares about WFV, Jock Sanders just made a gorgeous TD catch and made about four defenders miss on the way.

The economy-related signs on Gameday were the best ones, particularly the one about Auburn’s offense.

28-0, OU after one quarter. Think Stoops lets ’em run it up past 70 today?

Holly, I’m sorry you feel Clawful.

That Demps fella can run a little bit.

Penn Wagers is the worst official in the United States of America.

And it’s not even close.

maybe the Fl/Ark officals should just leave the flags on the field and pick them up when there isn’t a penalty. It would be easier on their backs

The feds admire OU right now. They wish they had that kind of efficiency in Waco 15 years ago.

Penn Wagers isn’t a name, it’s a sentence.

Anyone else in the Champagne Room getting redirected to a post from 2005 concerning the Master Coaches Poll featuring a then breathing Bo Schembechler?

Yes. It’s been doing that since last night.

While the spector of conference mutual destruction looms, how can I not be excited that the Cyclones have more than double KU’s passing yards at half?

Their tears salt my humble pie (a dinner pie).

My wall is now rumbling. It isn’t Marky M proof.

Flags everywhere!!! Laundry Bowl 1 is back from the half!!!

Watch out for the Funky Bunch.

So, after my nice run at the Botanical Gardens, I wandered home to watch GT-Duke and PSU-Purdon’t. Both, at this time, seem to be well in hand. I’m watching UF-Arkies now. Agree on PW. Was that UGA’s offensive line playing for the Gators in the second 1/4? Looks like the East favs have similar issues. Will I go to the WLOCP? (Ouch. Tebow just got the Marcus Howard treatment.)

I’m looking at watching as much of Bama-UK as necessary, then probably getting patriotic with Navy-AF at 4, Vandy-AU at 6, then my main course will likely be Texas-CU. Depends on how the ’dores hold up.

1. 62,

Several gentlemen for the Pac-10 beg to differ. SEVERAL.

Did anyone else see Kenny Chesney insult the service academies on GameDay this morning?

Baby Rhino is trying to lose back to back games for the Cryer.

Florida’s only up 17-7 in the 3rd, and Tebow Child just missed a wide-open Percy for an INT.

Harvin just got in the end zone. Equilibrium restored.

Dayum, Duke got smoked by the BEEEEEEES! 24-Zip.

Brainfart; 27-Zip BEEEEEEEEEEEES.

That’s OK, Orange Gator… God insulted Kenny in the height/looks area. Not sure how he’s maintained…

1. I saw it, but wouldn’t say he was “insulting the service academies” He was insulting Notre Dame, which should be insulted, for scheduling Army, Navy, Air Force, Coast Guard, and U.S. Maritime Academy every year.

HEY…that Chris Rainey kid is purdy fast….

Can we get a body on Uncle Verne? He just compared Saban favorably to Bear and I fear for his safety in the parking lot if this doesn’t go well.

MASSIVE improvement from Arkansas, especially on D.

This score’s going to look a lot worse than the game has been. For three quarters and some change, this was a competitive game.

I’m satisfied with the Hogs improvement.

looks like Alabama is picking up where they left off last week with GA…dammit…oh wait, penalty

Not that it matters…oh, MAN, Coffee is scary scary good.

Penalties, Schmenalties

Mt. Cody popping out of my birthday cake is now my nightmare, thanks, Holly.

Jamie, I’d feel sorry…but at least y’all faced him with a football team. We got nothing come 10/25 but a couple safeties and an O-Line.

@87

Funny, because Mt. Cody bursting out of a birthday cake is my greatest dream.

haybeav, you may need to seek treatment for that….bama just rolled over the kentucky QB to score

Please tell me someone else heard that Arrelious Benn was ‘crazy open’. My favorite, and the whitest call of the year going away.

I heard the “crazy open” comment.

And I just saw a shot of JPW’s mom during KY-Bama. Definitely hot.

Quoteth Uncle Gary Danielson: “I hope she’s the one in the middle.”

I could use more JPW Mom shots or their equivalent. Nice.

Oh, great fumble, Coffee. Jackass.

Good trivia question on CBS, since we were all wondering that last week.

that question aggravates my post traumatic stress syndrome….

WOOOOO!!! WE HAVE A DEFENSE!!!!

We’re 1 win away from going to Detroit! I never thought I’d be happy to say that.

One note on GT: they ran a rugby scrum for the entire first half. Just a huge mass of humanity pushing piles of Duke defenders around for thirty minutes.

Also: giggity. The flip side of the Houston Nutt coin just landed ass-up today.

To be fair, Orson, Ole Miss didn’t play too badly we just played well for once.

@ #82… Maybe, but at least Navy and Air Force are competitive and go to bowl games regularly. There are other opponents ND has scheduled over the past few seasons you could criticize more, like John Bunting coached-UNC, Ted Roof coached-Duke, SD State, (sadly) the ’Cuse, and…hello, Stanford!

Another note on Georgia Tech…they sell horrible hot dogs and their bathrooms have the same plumbing as a 95 year old man.

Hey ABC…if you’re gonna subject us to a shot of a Miami cheerleader for an extended period of time, for fuck’s sake, pick a cute one!

Crazy end to UN-Sodom & Gomorrah @ Colo. St., check your highlights for this one.

State’s down by 1, but scores with 9 seconds left, so the Scrambling Convicts try to turn the kickoff into something you’d see on Setanta. One lateral too many with 0:00 on the clock puts the ball in the hands of a Ram who runs it it in for a touchdown. Fucking-A.

I see how it is Swindle……..To cool to stop by the tailgate in the varsity parking lot. Oh you will rue the day Swindle….. Sorry we don’t have a precious “Jacket Navy” for you to write unending praises of; but we do the best with what we got, which is lots of concrete and homeless. GO JACKETS!

whatever…. see ya next game you choose to grace the jackets with your presence.

Bama has a player named Cary Grant. Player, indeed.

Nasty Internet Rumor: Tony Franklin is fired. Presser at 3:00.