CURIOUS INDEX, 10/2/2008
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It’s dapper when you carry it like a cane. Boise State welcomes you to the hammer party, Louisiana Tech.
If you didn’t flip over to Project Runway halfway through the game, then you’re one hundred percent man. However, we did, but even then we got to see enough of Kellen Moore’s unreal footwork, completely icy nerves, and AWACS field radar to come away duly impressed with the next killer qb drone to be installed in the Boise State system: 20-of-28 for 325 yards, 2 TDs, and smooooth as haiiiil in the process. Taylor Bennett, former GT starter and Boise State commit, went 9-27 and wants to be an FBI or CIA agent. Should you ever be pursued by Bennett, get far enough away to require the use of a handgun, and you will have a good chance of escaping the encounter without harm. Jackie Sherrill as font of knowledge makes logicians weep. Jackie Sherrill on TAMU: “Since when has A&M been a 25-point underdog to Oklahoma State or a 25-point underdog to anybody?” said former A&M coach Jackie Sherrill, referencing the opening line for Saturday’s game. “So they’ve taken a tremendous step back.” A program-crippling cheat recognizes good work when he sees one, so game respek game, Dennis Franchione. It’s fun to blame the perfectly bowling pin-shaped Mike Sherman, but Dennis Franchione is on the hook for the deep well of horseshit the Aggies have to wade out of over the next (insert daunting horrible number here) years. Censorship! How did this not make it onto Gameday! At-ti-ca! At-ti-ca! (It probably did not make it because the balls on that tiger are disturbingly dangly.) Cicero will get you in Uffie’s pants. The coolest coach, per Fox Sports, is Joe Paterno, because a working knowledge of the Classics will get the party hopping like crack frogs. We think this in error, as the coolest coach is actually Jeff Tedford, since his precise circuitry requires a constant running temperature of 78 degrees Fahrenheit. Jim Tressel’s Worst Nightmare: This blog! Or a pair of wrinkled slacks. Either one reduces him to a fetal position. |
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1
blon says:
Orson,
Thank you for putting blame where is blame is due in for A&M’s downslide. It will take Sherman a few years to get the program where it needs to be.
Considering how Franchione left several programs, I wonder how he sleeps at night.
October 2nd, 2008 at 9:59 am
2
Digital Headbutt says:
“(insert daunting horrible number here)”
I’ll go with 15. Technically speaking, that’s now two programs Carl Torbush had a hand in taking down.
October 2nd, 2008 at 10:11 am
3
Quincy's Connect says:
Can we please have a scene from the Wire featuring Travis Henry and Jimmy Johns? The People demand it.
October 2nd, 2008 at 10:20 am
4
Chuck says:
Kenley totally should have gone home last night, BTW. That dress looked like it was half-snake-half-fish.
October 2nd, 2008 at 10:39 am
5
Brian says:
Honest question. What are the odds that Boise St and Fresno St become members of the Pac 10? Those are the two logical choices. That would force the Pac 10 to have a championship game, although they would have to change their name to the Pacific Coast Conference.
Either that, or Boise and Fresno join BYU, TCU and Utah to starting forming a legit 7th BCS conference.
October 2nd, 2008 at 10:45 am
6
Brian says:
Question: Name the only two NCAAF QBs to throw a touchdown on their first collegiate pass.
Answer: Matt Leinart, Taylor Bennett.
Still though, he’s a POS. He submarined our season last year at GT with his piss poor showing up for games hungover and possibly still drunk antics. I believe we have 2 transfers currently starting elsewhere, with him and Threet up at michigan. Excellente.
October 2nd, 2008 at 11:31 am
7
Digital Headbutt says:
#5: That would be sweet reunites the best teams of the original WAC/MWC (Boise, Fresno, Utah, BYU, TCU, Air Force, maybe Hawaii), add a few that make geographic sense and have relative success (Colorado State, Nevada, UNLV, New Mexico), and that could be a true 7th BCS conference.
It would be about as competitive as the ACC or Big East, anyway.
October 2nd, 2008 at 11:34 am
8
Brian says:
@ #1 — To answer the question of how Franchione sleeps at night, I quote The Simpsons’ McBain: “On top of a pile of money, with many beautiful ladies.” (Austrian Accent Implied)
about 50 seconds in:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rIlpYLIiZLE
October 2nd, 2008 at 11:38 am
9
Mr.Pelican Pants says:
Are there any black mormons? I thought theyd be down with living with multiple babys mamas, like Travis Henry(minus the coke), except all the babys mamas would eventually kill each other…..but you would have to have a good location, like Miami…
October 2nd, 2008 at 12:33 pm
10
Spartisan says:
Is that Walt Simonson’s thunderer with uru hammer, or the John Byrne version?
October 2nd, 2008 at 12:37 pm
11
oc phil says:
#9 It is in Mormon scripture that black people were “cursed” with dark skin as a result of sin and they could only go to heaven as slaves. The church lifted a ban on black men serving as priests in 1978.
October 2nd, 2008 at 1:16 pm
12
meatybob says:
Nice job #8!
Althought, that was probably one of the worst Simpsons ever. David Mirkin should go to hell for killing the Simpsons.
BTW, on the topic of Gameday, did anyone catch Chris Berman on Ivy League football, talking about how is alma mater, Brown, is starting “interleague” play. First “interleague” play doesn’t exist in CF, we have conferences. Secondly, and certainly more incredious, “interleague” would assume games between 2 leagues (or in this case, conferences) but Brown is starting INTRAconference play. Berman is wrong on so many levels.
Just more proof that the Ivy League schools are much more “rich” than “smart”.
October 2nd, 2008 at 1:38 pm
13
Der Schatten says:
@5 I like the idea of a legitimate 7th BCS conference. But, really, even with the formation of one, you’d still only have 4.5 (-2 for the acc/big east and a .5 conference deduction to the Big Televen).
October 2nd, 2008 at 3:03 pm