BLOGTOBERFEST! WOBBLY MOPED EDITION

by Orson on Sep 17, 2008 2:52 PM EDT

Blogtoberfest: because bug-eyed Fulmer never, ever goes out of style.

--Dear Greg Easterbrook: please don't write about college football. You suck at it most whoreaciously. Love, the universe and the cheap, bloodthirsty Jews who run it.

--Badgers linebacker Jonathan Casillas will be in court Friday to face DUI charges for having a .15 and pushing it to the limit on a moped. Mark Hasty uses this as a chance to reference the infamous chalupa incident at Kansas, a note worth the whole article by itself.

--Todd Reesing is no one. Please move on.

--Tampans are a friendly, accommodating people!

KU alum Brent Kassing, 39, of Winter Park, attended the game with his cousins family. In all, they had five children ranging in age from 4 to 15.

I must have heard [expletive] you! about 200 times, said Kassing, who complained to USF officials in an e-mail. It was a terrible environment. I had never experienced that at an away game.

In other words: homefield advantage achieved, Bulls! Change nothing.

--Joe Cribbs Car Wash examines the likelihood that Auburn was sandbagging leading up to LSU. If that was sandbagging, it nearly resulted in auto-entombment.

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hamburlar

by naggers on Sep 17, 2008 3:04 PM EDT reply actions

“I didnt appreciate it, Grothe said. Some idiot of ours, every time a [KU] cheerleader walked by, he yelled [sexual slur] over and over to each and every one.”

YAY, he noticed us!

by BullGator on Sep 17, 2008 3:07 PM EDT reply actions

I want to know more about the Indonesians that died in the cash handout stampede, and why those assholes didn’t invite me. No one loves a good cash handout stampede more than me.

by Ham Malone on Sep 17, 2008 3:27 PM EDT reply actions

Reesing is 5’11?

by blon on Sep 17, 2008 3:29 PM EDT reply actions

Singlet Guy had something to do with this I’m sure.

by AstroBull on Sep 17, 2008 3:32 PM EDT reply actions

Getting a DUI on a moped is eight kinds of embarrassing.

by Biggus Rickus on Sep 17, 2008 3:41 PM EDT reply actions

You expletive sexual slurs can suck my expletive expletive.

by Biggus Rickus on Sep 17, 2008 3:56 PM EDT reply actions

Tampa welcomes you with bleeding elbows and burning meth-labs when you land at the airport. Plus, the town is home to the man who will fly a massive rebel flag above the major interstate junction in downtown Tampa.

Shit, TDK’s Joker would call this town fucked up. People complain about ignorant fans in other places . . . man, this place took the worst of the worst, inbred them, fed them hallucinogens and gave them football.

Tampa, where taste and innocence go to die.

by That 5.0 Guy on Sep 17, 2008 4:15 PM EDT reply actions

Just when you think CF has lost its way, then this Reesing story happens. I love football.

Easterbrook sucks, but there exists far worse. Thy “far worse” name is Frank Deford.

by meatybob on Sep 17, 2008 4:20 PM EDT reply actions

Keep in mind, guy was from Winter Park. For those not aware, Winter Park is filled with exactly two demographics:

1) The elderly who have their houses built in the 50s, delightfully unaware that the the dirt under their house is now worth ~$700,000, post-housing-market-collapse

2) The rich yuppies, who are pissed at their elderly neighbors, for still living in that ugly tank of a house built before they were born, and damnit, their kids shouldn’t have to look at an old house unless it’s historical and they’re on a long boring educational road trip, because they’re going to teach their kids history themselves, because the schools sure aren’t, even though they’re in the 12th best school district in the country. Because children are our future, unlike those elderly assholes who won’t tear down their houses so my property value can go up another $5,000 on my already $2,500,000 house. Fuck them! Oh, and cursing in front of children is bad.

by Not You on Sep 17, 2008 4:22 PM EDT reply actions

“Getting a DUI on a moped is eight kinds of embarrassing.”

Unless you’re wearing leathers when it happens. At that point it becomes legendary.

by paco on Sep 17, 2008 4:28 PM EDT reply actions

what are the odds those jayhawk fans had on jerseys?? jersey wearers deserve what they get.

by gerry dorsey on Sep 17, 2008 4:33 PM EDT reply actions

That googly-eyed Fulmer shot gets me everytime. Can LSUFreek do one with Fulmer’s head and the Runaway Bride’s eyes?

by EZ on Sep 17, 2008 4:44 PM EDT reply actions

To me, Fulmer’s always looked he could have been an associate of Henry Lee Lucas and Ottis Toole.

by sonofsamford on Sep 17, 2008 5:11 PM EDT reply actions

If Auburn was sandbagging, their football team should replace every levy immediately.

by Trojan Jon on Sep 17, 2008 5:18 PM EDT reply actions

just because i like snuff films, does not make me “bloodthirsty”. dick.

by lt.winslow on Sep 17, 2008 5:20 PM EDT reply actions

Begin the psychological warfare . . .

by ChasingMizzou on Sep 17, 2008 5:20 PM EDT reply actions

I think Bulls Report’s Brett McMurphy should be a future subject of Mustache Wednesday. Look at that ’stache!

by WarCardinals on Sep 17, 2008 6:28 PM EDT reply actions

Just so ya know, Danny Sheridan, odds maker guru, says Auburn was looking ahead to LSU and WILL BEAT LSU on Sat…..? So take AU straight up or take the points? Why is he trying to move the line?
Sandbagging? Hell more like quicksand…….or at least the offense was moving like it was in it……

by Mr.Pelican Pants on Sep 17, 2008 7:21 PM EDT reply actions

At least it’s not corndogs that are getting stolen. You’d think FFPF (Fat **** Phil Fulmer) would have better luck against the corndog nation than he has as of late.

by SEC Supremacist on Sep 17, 2008 7:44 PM EDT reply actions

Anybody who is supposedly as good as Auburn is supposed to be and looks as bad as they did Saturday night has key players in a position to control the score.

by Mark on Sep 17, 2008 11:01 PM EDT reply actions