OSU-USC WARNING SIGNS
ESPN had this headline up for most of yesterday, and it bugged the hell out of me all day:

That's just lazy, and maddeningly vague. There's nineteen different ways this could've been more informative, and they went with a grand total of none of them. "Sealed for your protection"? "Detour ahead"? "Not to be used as a flotation device"?
We're here to help, after the jump:




Further suggestions welcome below.
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Todd Boeckman, spokesman for Caste Football. (http://www.castefootball.us/)
by blon on Sep 12, 2008 12:58 PM EDT reply actions
Terrelle Pryor:
http://www.signoutfitters.com/store/category_images/1%20Student%20Driver%20Car%20Top%20Signs.gif
Beanie Wells:
Caution: Flat Tire
http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd188/LIL_DIBI_111/Flat_tire.jpg
by Geaux Irish on Sep 12, 2008 1:03 PM EDT reply actions
Someone actually takes the time to put that stuff up on the web.
by blon on Sep 12, 2008 1:06 PM EDT reply actions
I’m suspecting that for a meathead, Maualuga has very little trouble with the ladies.
by Bobby Decatur on Sep 12, 2008 1:08 PM EDT reply actions
Holy cow. No love for Jacob Guitierrez there at all.
by HeadThief on Sep 12, 2008 1:11 PM EDT reply actions
“I’m proficient in design and maintenance of response vehicle lighting systems such as light bars, beacons, and stationary lights. I have been known to do amazing things with Code 3 LP6100 beacons (such as placing two flashers and a rotator inside the dome), but recently have been very pleased with Federal Signal MagnaBeam oscillating lights, and I’m recommending those to people who need a high-performance compact light for rear or front coverage.”
It’s cognitively impossible to make shit like that up.
by Bobby Decatur on Sep 12, 2008 1:12 PM EDT reply actions
Loooouuuu…Hazardous Waste Warning – Toxic gas discharge from oral area. Protective gear and P100 respirators must be worn.
by yoyofutbawl on Sep 12, 2008 1:28 PM EDT reply actions
So not so much a warning sign, but a fitting street sign none the less:
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3037/2851429090_39a8d3c4a8_o.jpg
by WorstFan on Sep 12, 2008 1:31 PM EDT reply actions
Are OSU and USC playing this weekend? Why are none of the sports networks talking about it?
by Saban has Laser Eyes on Sep 12, 2008 1:37 PM EDT reply actions
Pam Ward- May Cause Extreme Drowsiness
by Terry Tate, Office Linebacker on Sep 12, 2008 1:50 PM EDT reply actions
Holly Rowe: Weight limit 10 tons
Jimmy Clausen: Two-way traffic
by ChemE93 on Sep 12, 2008 1:51 PM EDT reply actions
Here is the nightmare scenario:
USC crushes Ohio State, but loses a shootout against Oregon (who ends up 10-2) later in the season. The Trojans just miss the National Championship Game and they are out for blood.
Meanwhile, Ohio State pulls a series of close victories, 2002-style and go undefeated in the Big 10. This leads to a USC-Ohio State Rose Bowl and what will be Buckeyes’ second of three pantings by the Trojans in a one-year span.
by John on Sep 12, 2008 1:59 PM EDT reply actions
picture of beanie wells going down with “undeterminate foot ailment”, plus caution, floor slippery when wet sign.
by bj on Sep 12, 2008 2:02 PM EDT reply actions
Ahllahver FTW. And Bill Stewart FTL, forever [bangs head on nearest flat surface].
by Holly on Sep 12, 2008 2:02 PM EDT reply actions
Take your pick…Vince Young or Air Force Falcons- “No Passing Zone”
by Touchdown74 on Sep 12, 2008 2:08 PM EDT reply actions
How can we not have this one on the field, especially for this game for tOSU?
SLOW CHILDREN AT PLAY
by Mr. Pelican Pants on Sep 12, 2008 2:15 PM EDT reply actions
Or put this sign near the tOSU bench:
http://www.highwaytrafficsupply.com/images/regulatory_signs.html/r7-8.jpg
by Mr.Pelican Pants on Sep 12, 2008 2:19 PM EDT reply actions
I should have stopped drinking at 1am this morning.
by Allahver Fist on Sep 12, 2008 2:19 PM EDT reply actions
Okay, someone beat me to “Slow Children at Play” but which team (conference) merits the universal choking sign used in restaurants?
by Larry Langolier on Sep 12, 2008 2:21 PM EDT reply actions
by Terry Tate, Office Linebacker on Sep 12, 2008 2:22 PM EDT reply actions
Charlie Weiss:
http://www.martellssolutions.co.uk/ProductImages/132895.jpg
by Terry Tate, Office Linebacker on Sep 12, 2008 2:28 PM EDT reply actions
by Chris on Sep 12, 2008 2:37 PM EDT reply actions
Allahaver-
Keep em coming. Bad ass thick foggy day in Blowing Rock.
by yoyofutbawl on Sep 12, 2008 2:39 PM EDT reply actions
by Chris on Sep 12, 2008 2:52 PM EDT reply actions
You guys are making this day pass much quicker. Many thanks.
by Holly on Sep 12, 2008 2:58 PM EDT reply actions
no real point, but found this while looking for something else- don’t ask how
by Excuse me Stewardess, but I speak jive on Sep 12, 2008 2:58 PM EDT reply actions
Try Googling “warning signs” and “cults” and see how many of the warning signs apply to certain colleges/coaches.
by Larry Langolier on Sep 12, 2008 4:10 PM EDT reply actions
Allahaver-
How about one for old times sake of THE ORGERON.
by yoyfutbawl on Sep 12, 2008 4:23 PM EDT reply actions
yoyofutbawl,
Ran out of signs and inspirations, but here’s the rest of the cutting room floor:
by Allahver Fist on Sep 12, 2008 5:18 PM EDT reply actions
OSU sucks. Columbus sucks. Ohio sucks. Something, something mid-west. Something, something, slow. Something, something, DBs against Michigan. Blah, blah suck Moreno’s **** (because we have no chance). Yadda, yadda, our **** still doesn’t stink because blah, blah, blah.
by EDSBS witty commentary on Sep 12, 2008 10:21 PM EDT reply actions

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