ESPN had this headline up for most of yesterday, and it bugged the hell out of me all day:
That’s just lazy, and maddeningly vague. There’s nineteen different ways this could’ve been more informative, and they went with a grand total of none of them. “Sealed for your protection”? “Detour ahead”? “Not to be used as a flotation device”?
We’re here to help, after the jump:
Further suggestions welcome below.
Orson Swindle and Stranko Montana are two men pushing thirty who should know better than to run a college football blog, but evidently don't. Both graduated from the University of Florida, and both agree that college football is far too important to be left to the professionals.
Comments? Questions? Long strings of profanities directed at something we said? Please send your comments to harumphharumph -a- yahoo -dot- com. Please direct all tailgating photos and stories to edsbsfans -a- gmail -dot- com.
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1
GamecockTony says:
Pete Carrol :
http://www.trafficsign.us/w17.html
September 12th, 2008 at 11:56 am
2
blon says:
Todd Boeckman, spokesman for Caste Football. (http://www.castefootball.us/)
September 12th, 2008 at 11:58 am
3
Holly says:
Holy…is that site for real? Wow. Just…wow.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
4
hlh says:
Brent Musberger……..Caustic substance
September 12th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
5
Geaux Irish says:
Terrelle Pryor:
http://www.signoutfitters.com/store/category_images/1%20Student%20Driver%20Car%20Top%20Signs.gif
Beanie Wells:
Caution: Flat Tire
http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd188/LIL_DIBI_111/Flat_tire.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
6
blon says:
Someone actually takes the time to put that stuff up on the web.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:06 pm
7
Bobby Decatur says:
I’m suspecting that for a meathead, Maualuga has very little trouble with the ladies.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
8
Holly says:
The original photo of Rey is almost better.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
9
HeadThief says:
Holy cow. No love for Jacob Guitierrez there at all.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
10
Bobby Decatur says:
“I’m proficient in design and maintenance of response vehicle lighting systems such as light bars, beacons, and stationary lights. I have been known to do amazing things with Code 3 LP6100 beacons (such as placing two flashers and a rotator inside the dome), but recently have been very pleased with Federal Signal MagnaBeam oscillating lights, and I’m recommending those to people who need a high-performance compact light for rear or front coverage.”
It’s cognitively impossible to make shit like that up.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
11
OhioDawg says:
Induce Vomiting if Swallowed.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:13 pm
12
WorstFan says:
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3111/2850565667_bf889c445f_o.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
13
yoyofutbawl says:
Loooouuuu…Hazardous Waste Warning – Toxic gas discharge from oral area. Protective gear and P100 respirators must be worn.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
14
Allahver Fist says:
Stephen Garcia.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
15
WorstFan says:
So not so much a warning sign, but a fitting street sign none the less:
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3037/2851429090_39a8d3c4a8_o.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 12:31 pm
16
Saban has Laser Eyes says:
Are OSU and USC playing this weekend? Why are none of the sports networks talking about it?
September 12th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
17
shovel-pass says:
Worstfan…
damn, your good!
September 12th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
18
Dawg 05 says:
+1 Worstfan for “You Shall Not Pass”
September 12th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
19
Terry Tate, Office Linebacker says:
Pam Ward- May Cause Extreme Drowsiness
September 12th, 2008 at 12:50 pm
20
ChemE93 says:
Holly Rowe: Weight limit 10 tons
Jimmy Clausen: Two-way traffic
September 12th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
21
Holly says:
NICE, Terry.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
22
Allahver Fist says:
Bill Stewart.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
23
John says:
Here is the nightmare scenario:
USC crushes Ohio State, but loses a shootout against Oregon (who ends up 10-2) later in the season. The Trojans just miss the National Championship Game and they are out for blood.
Meanwhile, Ohio State pulls a series of close victories, 2002-style and go undefeated in the Big 10. This leads to a USC-Ohio State Rose Bowl and what will be Buckeyes’ second of three pantings by the Trojans in a one-year span.
September 12th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
24
bj says:
picture of beanie wells going down with “undeterminate foot ailment”, plus caution, floor slippery when wet sign.
September 12th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
25
Holly says:
Ahllahver FTW. And Bill Stewart FTL, forever [bangs head on nearest flat surface].
September 12th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
26
Touchdown74 says:
Take your pick…Vince Young or Air Force Falcons- “No Passing Zone”
September 12th, 2008 at 1:08 pm
27
Allahver Fist says:
Ahhh, this shit’s fun.
Brandon James.
September 12th, 2008 at 1:11 pm
28
Mr. Pelican Pants says:
How can we not have this one on the field, especially for this game for tOSU?
SLOW CHILDREN AT PLAY
September 12th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
29
Mr.Pelican Pants says:
Or put this sign near the tOSU bench:
http://www.highwaytrafficsupply.com/images/regulatory_signs.html/r7-8.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 1:19 pm
30
Allahver Fist says:
I should have stopped drinking at 1am this morning.
Mark Mangino.
September 12th, 2008 at 1:19 pm
31
Larry Langolier says:
Okay, someone beat me to “Slow Children at Play” but which team (conference) merits the universal choking sign used in restaurants?
September 12th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
32
Terry Tate, Office Linebacker says:
Mark Mangino
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v492/krazeangielala/xanga/pictures/do_not_feed.png
September 12th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
33
Terry Tate, Office Linebacker says:
Charlie Weiss:
http://www.martellssolutions.co.uk/ProductImages/132895.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
34
burgler says:
Ahllahver @30 –
Clap
…
Clap
…
Clap
…
Clap
…
September 12th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
35
Chris says:
speed bump!!!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v288/cbrock/Athk-Dr-Lous-thon-Thkip.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 1:37 pm
36
yoyofutbawl says:
Allahaver-
Keep em coming. Bad ass thick foggy day in Blowing Rock.
September 12th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
37
Allahver Fist says:
Jake Locker.
September 12th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
38
Chris says:
Jet Fuel
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v288/cbrock/jet-fuel.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 1:52 pm
39
Holly says:
You guys are making this day pass much quicker. Many thanks.
September 12th, 2008 at 1:58 pm
40
Excuse me Stewardess, but I speak jive says:
no real point, but found this while looking for something else- don’t ask how
http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a5/JorgeS4041/claussen.jpg
September 12th, 2008 at 1:58 pm
41
Allahver Fist says:
Jerrell Powe.
September 12th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
42
den-pie says:
USC Song Girls – “Slippery When Wet”
September 12th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
43
Larry Langolier says:
Try Googling “warning signs” and “cults” and see how many of the warning signs apply to certain colleges/coaches.
September 12th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
44
Because They Can says:
Jimmy Clausen: “DIP”
September 12th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
45
yoyfutbawl says:
Allahaver-
How about one for old times sake of THE ORGERON.
September 12th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
46
Allahver Fist says:
yoyofutbawl,
Ran out of signs and inspirations, but here’s the rest of the cutting room floor:
Da Coach O
BYU
Mississippi State
meh
I’m gonna burn in Hell
September 12th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
47
PCB says:
OK, it’s inevitable:
Nutcracker ahead!
September 12th, 2008 at 5:42 pm
48
EDSBS witty commentary says:
OSU sucks. Columbus sucks. Ohio sucks. Something, something mid-west. Something, something, slow. Something, something, DBs against Michigan. Blah, blah suck Moreno’s **** (because we have no chance). Yadda, yadda, our **** still doesn’t stink because blah, blah, blah.
September 12th, 2008 at 9:21 pm