EDSBSGPS: WHERE WE AT, WEEK 3

Holly, we all know Swindle can’t make it through the weekend without the Three Daves at 12:30 ET.

Who can?

Woo some Alabama-Birmingham Love from Holly! Assuming I’m the only UAB fan who reads this I’m hoping UAB actually wins against Tennessee. It’s a long shot, but stranger things have happened. Oh and we all want some Dave Love.

I have no love for UAB this weekend. Sorry, brah. (govawls!!)

The difference between you and Bowden being that you actually write about college football well. Also, I don’t think Terry has shown off his rack on the Internet to settle a bet, and if he has I don’t want the pictorial evidence.

I’m one of the 32% of Americans who will be getting Penn State/Syracuse on ABC. This means that Oregon/
Purdue will be on ESPN and the game I’m most interested in, Georgia Tech vs. Virginia Tech, will have to be followed via internet. Between those three and UGA/USC and ND/UM, one of the 3:30 games has to be interesting. Right?

John,

I’m not sure the Battle of the Techs will be interesting, but it should be close. The same could be true of UGA-USCum. Really, the 3:30 games could be comedies of errors. Notre Dame-Michigan should be off the charts on the schadenfreude scale.

Holly, I’m gonna miss the Three Daves. Perhaps they can replace Thom Brennerman on Fox.

You & Honey Pie can root for your Vowels.

This is wildly off-topic, but since it’s the weekend and all, I’d like to share maybe the greatest spam comment we’ve ever gotten:

Dear Senior, Lou Holtz,

!!YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION TO ME!!

I am a big admirer of you, your persona, demeanor, looks and style,
Can’t figure out why so many people dislike /ridicule you or are they simply just jealous because of your good fortune?

Would love to know if you could answer me. I will very happy if you did!!

Yours,

Luis D. Rey
205 3rd Ave. Apt.1-C
New York, N. Y. 10003-2507

Note to football fans: if USC blows out Ohio State, UConn/UVA is available on ESPNU. The battle for East Coast supremacy!!

So I’m like the only one not watching the USC game, eh?

Dear Dr. Lou,

Thank you for your advice on dealing with my neighbor. You were right, just because her husband died a few months ago of stomach cancer is no reason to show her any respect. She’s been living a lie all season long. She ain’t playing no Kansas State. So I put her in a headlock. That’ll teach her to not throw a flag.

/overwhelmed by so many ‘hate lou holtz’ memories

Good Lord… Michigan/Notre Dame… is it possible to have negative total yards combined in a game? I mean I know Miami/FSU tried a few years ago with just like 9 total first downs…

And I pity the poor fuckers forced to watch Syracuse/Penn State… you know, like the stadium crew, the officials, God…..

“For those about to rock…” change the channel, because we’re showing Kansas-USF.

Jim Leavitt apparently wants to look like Mangino if he’s drinking a 12 pack of Pepsi a day.

Damnit I hate Spielman…. he’s like Pam Ward but lacking the hot, sexual tone…

If you are in San Diego and will be watching tOSU play some California directional school….

Try Moondoggies in Pacific Beach…unless the thought of being surrounded by Buckeyes repels you, in which case it would be a bad idea.

It’s the local Buckeye hang-out. Will be crowded and should get there early.

Hey SWINDLE, if you put on ESPN2 at noon, EST you can see the Rum Soaked Stash that saved the sunshine state from going 0’fer in last year’s in Bowl Season.

Schnelly leads my Owls against Sparty live from East Lansing

Navy@Duke? My God, Holly. Let no college football fan doubt your ovarian fortitude.

Harris, Duke has our old OC as their new head coach, whom I adore, and I want to see what he does with the place.

I am golfing in the morning. Getting gas before all the stations run out on the way to the course. Before I get home I need to get some new nylon rope. The damn neighbor kids stole the old hemp rope I had laying around. I am watching every game carried until 8pm. Then I am watching the Buckeyes. After that I will decide how best to use the new rope. I may or may not be commenting on Monday.

tOSU/USC has it’s own block on the ticker.
They have shown Beanie “Boobie Miles” Wells getting hurt and carried off the field about eleventy-million times.
Herbstreit actually turned on his alma matter on PTI.
I think they actually just broke into the Galveston Emergency Broadcast to inform everyone that Wells is now OUT for the game.

is anyone else as tired as I of hearing about THE COLLISION AT THE COLLISEUM???

I actually really hope it ends up with the Buckeyes winning with a late field goal, 3-0.

They really should not try to talk to Magino as he walks off the field. I thought he was just about to stroke out. Or maybe he was looking at the sideline guy as nourishment to help him get to the locker room.

Mangino needs a jetpack transportation system like Baron Harkonnen had. He is beyond walking around.

Dr. Lou = Dr. Kevorkian…

Has USF’s offense sparked to the point they’re all about to spontaneously combust on the field? Or did Mangino pour all the energy drinks for Kansas’ defense into a 5 gallon bucket and down it like a shot o’ tequila? WTF WTF WTF?!?!

Yeah, all of a sudden USF is looking lively.

Mangino needs to take out the entire O-Line and go in himself; I think he could do a better job of blocking ALL of USF’s D-Line.

Yeah, Holly, and I like lollipops, but I wouldn’t eat one off the floor of a public restroom.

Oh, Mrs. Selvie. Finger waves? Really? I guess it’s better than a multi-colored weave, but not by much.

Gift. Of. Prophecy.

Are you fucking shitting me?! The GODDAMN play GODDAMN stands as GODDAMN called on the GODDAMN field?! Could that have been anymore obvious that the KU player caught the ball then took about two steps?!

Please REDACT all the aforementioned GDs; Yuengling has got the USF hate flowin’ freely tonight.

the Yuengling is treating me juuust fiiiiiine.

good game, too. if it weren’t for all those GODDAMN ads for the OSU/USC game…

Why does #74 (Spikes?) for KU not have some laces hanging from his posterior? Because by now somebody shoulda put a foot in his ass for that piss-poor performance.

Quigley goes Down Under to SCORE! Anyone remember that movie?

@ 32 – Yeah, it is a pretty good game. As an Auburn fan, I wanna roll around in some schadenfreude at USF’s expense. And the Yeungling is treating me just fiiiiiiine as well.

He’s been a 5-foot-11 quarterback his whole life? Jesus, he must have been the most terrifying quarterback in the history of Pop Warner football. I swear I don’t know how either of these QBs can play with the announcers hanging on their dicks all night.

!!!!!!!!!!

Why are you throwing the deep ball with :40 secs?

YES!!! USF Pic ran back into FG range! And he got out of bounds!

War Damn Eagle, Kick.

I gonna call it Wide LEFFFTT!!

Please don’t choke.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!!

sorry, had to blow off some steam…

Day-um…..and Mangino EXPLODES

It’s a BEEEEEEEEEEEEES kinda night, man.

Wheres the singlet guy???

Wow, and I remember thinking around halftime that you could stick a fork in USF.

BEEEEEESSSSS! Sorry, had enough to drink that I’ll yell anything that an attractive young lass yells (/wink at Holly). And that was a good kick by USF’s kicker and a good game overall.

Can we make South Fla an SEC school?

WOW, just WOW. What a game!

not enough violations or scandals to be initiated into the SEC.
I’d trade Vandy and a 1984 Mark McGuire Donruss card for them though.

Give them time….

Well, that does it for us as a top 25 school for a while. Hellva game and USF deserved to win. Not a bad way to spend the early part of friday night.

/still sucks to lose.

Ah well, until Gameday tomorrow, g’night everyone.

ESPN hypes the shit out of OSU-USC, and that game will likely suck.

ESPN barely mentions KU-USF, and it ends up being the best game of the year so far.

ESPN = Epic fail

ok, since i’m a little drunk and watching the movie, the parallel makes since:
I can only hope that USC is like Apollo Creed in the beginning of Rocky IV and comes in all supercharged as the favorite but gets killed (figuratively) by the big-ass Russian (tOSU).
This game is really picking the evil of 2 greaters, but I can’t decide which team i wish widespread delayed-infant-death-syndrome upon the most… Maybe the Colliseum will implode and just finish it as it ends in my dreams: No USC, No tOSU. But i’d save The Humanitarian, since he has the secret to patching the hole in the ozone layer that he’s waiting to unveil until his “Greatest Coach Evar” award ceremony.

Coach Carrol vs. Global Warming: environment = pwned

I am watching the repeat of KU-USF on ESPN2 right now because I was busy at work; that’s how good the end was and I want to see all of how it got there.

Poor Mangino won’t be able to eat out of depression after this loss. He’ll only be able to get down two, maybe three fried turkeys.

So sad.

Kocktail for the Dune reference.

Did my slightly growing intoxicated state deceive me or did ESPN fail to show more than a upper body shot of The Mangina all night?

If they did, I was planning on reacting like Bluto to Flounder’s picture in Animal House during rush selection.

What a way to begin the weekend. That was one of the most well-played “big games” I’ve been to. USF fans even seemed to be more satisfied with their team—if it’s possible—than after the WVU win last year, because this time they played good CLEAN football.

Holy crap what a kick.

And, while we are pretty good drinkers in Gville, those USF people can really drink.

Just wanted to know how much is ESPN paying you guys now that you are so mainstream in the CFB world.
Never really noticed the GamePlan stuff until this morning.
Nicely done, nicely done indeed.

I hate throw a bucket of truthiness on the pimpslap of Porky Pig there, but I’m pretty sure Terry Bowden is providing the national radio color commentary for the OSU/USC Trobuckalyspe.

Anyone else baking in the glow of a rival’s loss this morning?

I meant “basking in the glow” but this is a special hot glow, so baking works.

Desmond’s checkin out the internets! Trying to figure out if I should resist the impulse to get my drank on at 9:36 am. FOOBAW!

I had to start at about 8:30 for the Georgia Southern game because I’m a very important person who got to go on the field for warmups.

@ 65 – Who’s GSU playing today?

VIP – Very Important Person / Very Intoxicated Person

For anyone who is losing money in the stock market and is looking for a sure bet. Pick Georgia over S Carolina (-7.5). This pick is better than any blue chip you’ll find. Moreno rushes for 140 and Stafford passes for 275.

Neuheisel: “Lollygaggin, that’s old school for lazy.”

The Byooteefullness continues!

The USF-Kansas game last night was one of the most entertaining games of the season.

Learning that Chris Spielman actually eats beef jerky during commercial breaks was just the icing on the cake. Talk about confirming everything you think you know about the universe… I’m just surprised he wasn’t eating the butchered remains of a deer he killed with his bare hands.

EA Sports simulation of Meeeechigan vs. ND:

Michigan 13
Notre Dame 11

Somebody needs to tell those southern California dimwits that Butkus went to Illinois, not Ohio State.

Holly, I hope your team’s old OC is keeping his resume in circulation, because my Fighting Methodists pretty much tore up what decorating he’s done to WW Stadium. The Middies might finish the job if they can translate mass and acceleration into another Eckel, but they would need to come down on Duke like an anchor on a tugboat.

I’m flipping between the Northwestern and State games this morning, and working up a nice bolus of hate for Notre Dame. After that, I’ll either be playing with power tools, or seething in a dark room.

As far as OSU-USC goes, I’m rooting for the swarthy guy carrying the suitcase nuke.

I’d be happy to do the job myself, but my man Yuri is fresh out, and since the Mission is getting a lot of extra love from the po-pos this weekend, it seems like a good time to stay indoors.

PJ, I don’t hold out that much hope for today, but it’s Duke—he wins four games and he’s a folk hero.

I, BocaHuskyUWowl, challenge Michigan State to an honor du-el.

Leaning on the clicker all day today because I’m assisting with the Pam Ward Chronicles at AA this weekend.

Emphasis on (if you care):

Cal @ Maryland (for Friedgen jokes alone)
FAU @ MSU (Pam Ward game, have to chronicle the stupid)
UCLA @ BYU
Georgia @ South Carolina
Michigan @ ND (CRIPPLE FIGHT!)
OSU @ USC (duh)
Wisky @ Fresno State (go, Mustache Riders!)

If I get a chance to sneak in some GT-VT, I will. I wanna see the triple option with better athletes; I get to see that offense a lot here in I-AA land.

Corso’s tie matches the Trojan breastplate! That is oh so totally…gay.