ARE YOU WITH ME, DR. LOU?
Lou, you tried. They gave you nothing, but you tried. You were stuck out there with a few props, a whistle, and a Starter cap, and you made magic happen. Now they’ve put you in a suit, forced you to commit a felony by impersonating a doctor, and robbed you of your opportunity to look your team–that team, by the way, being AMERICA–and pump us up for the hard week ahead.
Oh, you might have thought you were just talking about Notre Dame, or Nebraska, or whatever doomed team you were trying to hype into believing they could beat a far superior team. But in reality, Lou, we were all taking a knee and drinking it in like wide-eyed freshmen. Like them, for one fateful instant, we believed.
Now you’re Dr. Lou…which forces us to sing songs of lament and instant nostalgia.
(HT: OPS and Holly on the Holtzfarks.)
God forbid you take a second off that spreadsheet, but if your boss is a Mark May-scale dick and won’t let you take two minutes to watch a fine internet production, listen or download below. Boston Market has a great dinner special for $6.99.









1
BurritoBrosShits says:
Oh dear God……
Lou’s head in a mushroom cloud has to be the next t-shirt. Only he can be the harbinger of a nuclear apocalypse.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:06 am
2
Kwaj says:
How much alcohol was involved in the production of this video?
September 10th, 2008 at 10:22 am
3
TJ says:
Bravo, you magnificent motherfuckers. Bra-fucking-vo.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:23 am
4
Steely Dan says:
ROTFLMAO!
Fuck Palmer! Becker-Fagen-Hall has a nice ring to it.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:33 am
5
Edsall is God says:
Did anyone catch the montage of Lou’s pep talks they showed before the first game of the season? Quite possibly the greatest montage in the history of montages.
They probably had to cancel the pep talk segment because it was too awesome.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:38 am
6
Ryno says:
Seriously, don’t eat at Boston Market.
Their Mac and cheese may feature curly noodles – but the rest of their food is drenched in salt.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:40 am
7
ALGator says:
@6 – Re: Boston market: I wouldn’t recommend the locale by the oaks mall on newberry in Gainesville. Clean it is not.
As for the video of Dr. Lou… terrible. I’m sick of people putting these hacked up pieces of crap on youtube and people thinking they’re great. Are you kdding me??? FAIL.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:18 am
8
Biggus Rickus says:
I partially agree with AlGator, but the song is awesome.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:24 am
9
Orson Swindle says:
ALGator–um, are you waiting for those really professional Youtube videos to appear? Because, you know, they’re gonna be there any day now. Yup. Any day now.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:25 am
10
Trojan Jon says:
This is quite possibly my new favorite song ever. The production value is off the charts. Did Phil Spector produce this?
Orson, what are your musical influences? This felt like Steely Dan crossed with Michael McDonald as sung by Carl Lewis.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:26 am
11
The OtherOther Drew says:
Orson,
The harmony really makes it.
ALGator can suck the Holtz-Cock. And loooooffe itf.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:37 am
12
kaiser says:
That world class Steely Dan reference made me do a bong hit. You are a bad influence.
My bong’s name is Lido.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:53 am
13
TCOAN says:
ur weerd
September 10th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
14
InsaneCoachPosse says:
tone down the anger, bleep a few invectives and this song is being played on ESPN this weekend
marvelous stuff, though..
thanks for the memories
September 10th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
15
dr. meatybob says:
Calling yourself a Dr. is a felony in most states? Blah! F’ing Nazis! THE PIGS ARE WALKING!!!
September 10th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
16
Holly says:
Are you kidding me? Those took at LEAST seven minutes to throw together. Show some respect.
September 10th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
17
The Great Barstoolio says:
Horrifyingly magnificent.
It’s the doubled-over Orson voice that makes it.
September 10th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
18
Trojan Jon says:
@17: Maybe next time he should try to sing standing up.
Now I gotta go write my take for Rome tomorrow, if you’ll excuse me.
September 10th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
19
NRBQ says:
He really is just a shadow of the man that we once knew.
September 10th, 2008 at 3:21 pm
20
corn blight says:
Okay, Lou Holtz is a dip shit. We get it. Now you’ve fucked up a perfectly good Steely Dan song, and I hope those guys find you in the middle of the night and beat your hands bloody in a back alley somewhere.
And as if the “Dr Wu” reference couldn’t be seen coming fifteen miles away.
How do you parody something so horrible as Lou Holtz? Badly, that’s how.
Can we just declare a “No Lou Holtz” cease fire? All you’re doing is making sure the sorry bastard stays on the air.
September 10th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
21
George says:
Lou is more of a doctor than any of the “Doctors of Education” that make up the corps of university presidents.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:23 pm