CURIOUS INDEX, 9/8/08

All is right: LSUFreek and Photoshop are reunited. LSUFreek spent the past week running around the Louisiana/Mississippi area fleeing Gustav and its various side effects. Fortunately for humanity, he is back in place in an undestroyed home, drank in one hand and Photoshop in the other, to give you the full NPRish account of both Gustav's aftermath, and its devastating effects on Chris Smelley.

In Gainesville we refer to that as "discretion." Steve Spurrier would have thrown a fade to the back of the endzone, but let's not let little details like past precedent or the fact that you're on the field and playing football get in the way of what you'll say anyway: Randy Shannon didn't have anything to say about the Florida field goal with 1:56 left on the clock, except for that thing that he said.

''I'll just say this one statement," Shannon told reporters. "Sometimes when you do things, and people see what type of person you really are, you turn a lot of people off. Now, whatever you want to get out of that, I won't say it again. But it helped us. It helped us more than you'll ever know."

It certainly helped Miami more than their offense did Saturday night, then. (The Reggie Ball offense lives!) "Running up the score" is a term Mike Lupica uses. That alone should disqualify its use as a term of serious meaning or use in any corners of the known universe.

BEES! Tony Barnhart wonders out loud if Georgia Tech can win the ACC Coastal, a possibility if Miami continues to use the same offense that crippled Tech's chances in the division and the division--Duke, Miami, Virginia Tech, Virginia, and UNC--continues its uniform crapulence. Tech won an ugly, sloppy, messy, fumble-filled 19-16 win over Boston College Saturday, but it was a win nonetheless. The November 20th GT/Miami game in Atlanta might be a race to six points for victory. Paul Johnson's number one friend in year one: other teams' galling mediocrity.

Rick Neuheisel is Stringfellow Hawk. Helicopters. Yes, helicopters, bitches.

Penn State's Jerome Hayes, three bad letters for you: A-C-L. The PSU starting DE is out for the rest of the year with the dreaded "timing belt of the knee" injury.

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