Insert “a quarterback running for his goddamn life” here. Jimbo Fisher will not divulge his starter for Florida State’s opener Saturday. (Remember: Florida State did not participate in the “ACC, How My Ass Taste? Weekend.” They had a hall pass or something.)

Ninth-year starter Drew Weatherford, Christian Ponder, or D’Vontrey Richardson will start. If Richardson starts, Florida State may have to forfeit the game, as we suspect D’Vontrey is just a pseudonym for Xavier Lee, who has been training with Henri Ducard on a Tibetan mountaintop learning to use fear as a weapon, shadow as a friend, and the skinny post as a spear against hesitation.

So you’re staying, pretty standard for gameday? Tiger Stadium took damage from Hurricane Gustav that sounds fairly mild compared to what could have happened (on a standard Saturday night, anyway.)

However, Tiger Stadium had some damage, including broken glass and torn awnings over club seats. Debris littered the stands and playing field and the fence surrounding the field was damaged. A large scoreboard above the north end zone also was damaged.

FEMA responded by sending LSU fifteen thousand expired MREs and purchasing eighty tons of concrete and shipping it overnight to San Juan, Puerto Rico. LSU plans to use the MRE’s to feed Ricky Jean-Francois for three days and will muddle along fine without outside help.

However, Tiger Stadium had some damage, including broken glass and torn awnings over club seats. Debris littered the stands and playing field and the fence surrounding the field was damaged. A large scoreboard above the north end zone also was damaged.

That Thing I Decided Has Been Reversed Deleted and Revised. Sean Glennon/Tyrod Taylor indecision: HOT 2008 REMIX DROPPIN’ NOW, BOOOYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEE!!!

Perhaps Fowler has an allergy to intentionally frayed baseball caps. Blutarsky points out that while Gameday has been to involved (see comment thread for clarification/correction) Florida 27 times (because it’s so fun! not because of Borg-demography determining much of what ESPN does!), Georgia and LSU are not in the top ten in appearances. Georgia’s absence from this is baffling, while LSU’s may be more explicable: the environment is so absolutely hectic on Gameday that we’d wager staging a live broadcast there has to be a nine-ring circus of uncaged animals and rampant logistical curveballs. (”Whaddya mean we have to pay some guy named Laveaux a grand to get the lights on?”)

Mr. Stabby, Oklahoma State fan in training. Belated note of football-related violence: Oklahoma football players out for a night on the town did write checks their bodies can’t cash, son. [/topgun'd!] Anytime you suffer a “minor stab wound and collapsed lung” and walk away from things, you’re in the win column in life.

You know this was not the work of T. Boone Pickens’ wind-powered assassin robots, since they would have finished the job and then recycled the bodies in an eco-friendly, economically viable fashion.