THAT HAT IS ACTUAL SIZE.
Larry! Call the boys! LOOK!!!
See that? You know what this means?
GIANT ROBOT BEAR IS APPROACHING COMPLETION!!! Oh, just wait until he burns Opelika! The screams! Oh, the festive screams! Take a picture, Levi. WOOOO ROOOOOOOOLL TAAAAAAAAHDE!!! Robot Bear and Saban gonna take us back to the promised land! Thank god he runs on human blood and Chesterfields, what with gas being so expensive. LOVE YOU GIANT ROBOT BEAR!!!
(It’s actually the roof for a concession stand called “The Bear’s Den,” which will serve hot dogs, hamburgers, nachos, and individually-wrapped bourbon-flavored cigarette ceviches-to-go. The hat will be stolen in six months, and we will bet hard American currency on this.
The Bear’s Den will serve the usual stadium fare — hamburgers, hotdogs and nachos, and will be one of several themed concession stands. Ezell’s Fish Camp, for example, will have a tin roof and look like a cabin on the lake, and Crimson Fried has a mural of past UA football teams, Evans said.
To paraphrase Troy Smith on Jamarcus Russell’s taste in jewelry: a snack stand hawking fried balls of tasty death with the name “Crimson Fried” is an incredible representation of any and all things Alabama.)
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1
RaginCajunRebel says:
Les Miles’ hat is not impressed.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:16 am
2
Not The Mama says:
I don’t care if it was the seventies, it took a bear of a man to wear that hat.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:24 am
3
inthevalley says:
This kind of stuff has to have the bear rolling in his grave.
Roll Bear Roll
August 28th, 2008 at 10:28 am
4
nixforsix says:
How long before the end zones are painted houndstooth?
August 28th, 2008 at 10:30 am
5
PW says:
30 years from now, they’ll display a 15:1 scale replica of Saban’s gray sportcoat. Of course, it will just look like a normal size sportcoat.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:32 am
6
AlanInDC says:
Nice to see Alabama is using its share of the ESPN TV money wisely. What’s next? Candy and baseball cards? These god damn kids and their money…
August 28th, 2008 at 10:33 am
7
sevenDs says:
Go ahead Saban, try getting out from under that shadow.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:35 am
8
sb says:
The banal excesses of the bammer nation and its titanium bonds to the past never cease to amaze…
August 28th, 2008 at 10:41 am
9
Busted Draft Pick says:
And here I expected a gigantic Fulmer Cup to be raised on the stadium grounds. Live in the now, Alabama.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:45 am
10
Picture Me Rollin says:
It should be noted, not that it will do a damn bit of good, that the company that is doing this if from Connecticut (insert stupid, carpetbagging, Yankee joke here). I, for one, am not in favor of this. I don’t give two shits about what you look-down-your-nose, they-won’t-let-the-past-die bastards (especially the booger-eaters amongst you) think. It’s the simple fact that my Coke is now going to cost six-mother-fucking-dollars so that some suit Up-North, whose never been to an SEC game, can pay for a 500 lb Houndstooth Hat, because he thinks us simple Southern football fans will buy more nachos if they are served under it (he may be right). As for me, I just want something to mix with my bourbon that doesn’t cost more than my bourbon.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:50 am
11
blon57 says:
When you are reading an article about a food concession stand at a stadium, you know you have been without football way too long.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:57 am
12
Tater Salad says:
+1 to most of the comments so far. I knew this would end up here.
I agree with picture me rollin, though. Although I’m somewhat excited about Ezells having a place in the stadium. Of course, I’m normally too hammered to eat at the stadium anyway.
Oh, and Orson. You should check out Rappaport’s blog on al.com. There’s some possible material there, relating to a story when Saban was an assistant at tOSU. It has all the makings of something that will get a lot of hits on this site.
The OBC at Duke outsmarting tOSU and Saban. tOSU, a la Bellichick, sending a GA to spy through the scoreboard, only to find the OBC running the wishbone. Trickery…
August 28th, 2008 at 10:57 am
13
MG says:
Good grief. The guy died like 90 years ago. Let it go gumps. heres a hint for you, Bear wouldn’t win nearly as much as, say, Spurrier did since they don’t allow you to sign 200 players a year now. Whats next? You gumps going to exhume Bears skeleton and prop it up on the sidelines??
August 28th, 2008 at 11:02 am
14
Julio says:
By the time you wipe the first nacho drizzle off your face, I’ll be in the endzone doing the Soulja Boy.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:05 am
15
sb says:
picture @ #10…”booger eaters”? Actually I find it charming that a segment of the SEC population finds more self-validation and personal understanding in a cigarette smoke/bourbon scented image of a hard man and the past he so strongly immortalizes. Of course the charm does wear thin whenever “bama” or “bear’ come up and the loyal minions of said image either wax on in rhapsody or defend whatever slights their thin skin feels.
What fun.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:09 am
16
Jason says:
Does it shoot out Golden Flakes chips and racial slurs when Bama scores?
August 28th, 2008 at 11:12 am
17
spartymike says:
Ezell’s Fish Camp? Hoooh-leee shit.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:17 am
18
Picture Me Rollin says:
let me reiterate for all of you who didn’t read my first post- us “gumps” and “bammers” didn’t do this, somebody in Connecticut did. Everyone know that this is a plot hatched by ESPN, the NCAA, Auburn, and Tennessee to ridicule us.
“Leave us the hell alone, people”
August 28th, 2008 at 11:24 am
19
sevenDs says:
Rollin’ @#10, Bama is the only school that comes to mind where one person is an icon of the program. It is unique yet, strange for the rest of us. I do think it’s a good marketing idea. I make fun of it because, well I’m an Auburn fan, it’s part of what I do. Just like if we had concession stands called the Eagle’s Nest and Tiger Den, you would probably respond with a shot at our nickname/mascot icons.
If we did have these places, I’d hope they serve chops.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:25 am
20
Tider says:
As a Tide fan, this is embarassing. We aren’t cool with this.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:32 am
21
Brian says:
Nice, way to turn the stadium into a Mall Food Court. Hilarious. “Hey Maw, we didn’t get enough food tailgating before the game, and Im so damned hungry I cant wait til after! Go git me some fried fish from the fish shack!”
I think they should install a waffle house in one of the luxury boxes, sit down, have some scattered covered smothered, and watch some ball. Vanilla cokes too.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:33 am
22
Unhappy Monkey says:
NFL’esque.
(That’s not a compliment, by the way)
August 28th, 2008 at 11:33 am
23
gerry dorsey says:
concession stand my ass?? put a fog machine on it and run out of that fucker.
i kid, i kid. this is cheesy and lame, but so much is these days. blame connecticut.
why is that second “c” in conneCticut??
August 28th, 2008 at 11:37 am
24
Thor says:
I have the next one, Crimson Tide Tampon dispensers
August 28th, 2008 at 11:38 am
25
blon57 says:
At Texas games/tailgates all you see a lot of BBQ. How many schools slow cook their mascot?
August 28th, 2008 at 11:39 am
26
InsaneHollyPosse says:
I have it on good authority they will be selling candy cigarettes in a Chesterfield box and apple juice from a miniature burbon bottle at this concession stand
along with Golden Flake chips and Coke of course
August 28th, 2008 at 11:40 am
27
PeterPumpkinhead says:
When I first saw this I hoped against all hope it was a fark done over pictures of them lowering real equipment into the Stadium… alas…
Though I will reiterate what PMR keeps saying, it’s not us, it’s the frickin Connecticut yankees (and we all know all Connecticut is good for is fucking) that do the National’s concessions (Oh God, are you kidding me!?!), that Mal, in an alzheimer’s induced stupor, decided to hire…
Though I am kinda psyched about Five Guys in the stadium.
Oh, and… “just like if we had concession stands called the Eagle’s Nest and Tiger Den”… no, you just have a stadium you call THE JUNGLE
August 28th, 2008 at 11:40 am
28
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
No Offense Dept
No offense….well, here comes the offense….
Why is ‘Bama… a “has been” college footbaw team….
… getting prime time exposure on the day College Football becomes alive again?
August 28th, 2008 at 11:42 am
29
NRBQ says:
Boogers. Mmmmmmm!
August 28th, 2008 at 11:44 am
30
Tater Salad says:
@ 21-
That’s one of the reasons I hate this. Naturally, the “entertainment company” doing this also owns concession stands in numerous professional arenas. Boo this concession stand.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:45 am
31
Tater Salad says:
SKLM:
Because it gets hits. It gets hits because people like you, who apparently don’t care about Alabama, can’t resist taking digs at the program, because you know that people like me will respond. It’s beautiful.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:47 am
32
sevenDs says:
” no, you just have a stadium you call THE JUNGLE”
To reiterate, anything that accommodates our icons is a target.
And you have a stadium that seems to give us home field advantage.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:47 am
33
Tater Salad says:
sevenDs,
I will admit that this hat is incredibly ridiculous if you admit that referring to your stadium as “the jungle” and piping in crowd noise is also ridiculous.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:52 am
34
PeterPumpkinhead says:
sevenDs, I was simply pointing out the hypocrisy of Auburn fans making fun of how someone else names things… it was not a dig at the stadium itself, which is actually pretty nice, and sickeningly loud (at least if you’re standing on the sideline in front of the student section)
August 28th, 2008 at 11:52 am
35
Unhappy Monkey says:
Alabama needs to just go ahead, pull the trigger and change their name from the Alabama Crimson Tide to the Alabama Bear Bryants. Get rid of Al the Elephant and have a mean drunk dressed up in a mean drunk costume (or a blow up thing like Nebraska’s Lil Red) walking around the stadium taking picture with the kids (read: 40+ year olds).
August 28th, 2008 at 11:53 am
36
inthevalley says:
“And you have a stadium that seems to give us home field advantage.”
Roffle Mayo
August 28th, 2008 at 11:56 am
37
kwaj says:
Not really off topic.
If you could roll with both of the Houndstooth Twins at the same time, would you make them wear the hat?
You know…just because….:-)
August 28th, 2008 at 11:58 am
38
Tater Salad says:
Roffle Mayo = funniest thing I’ve ever seen typed.
August 28th, 2008 at 12:06 pm
39
Crabapple Buck says:
SKLM
Are you saying Alabama=ND south?
August 28th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
40
jakldawg says:
Penn State has responded by a concession stand with a big pair of glasses and cleats. Naturally, they sell BRAAAAINNNSS!!!!
August 28th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
41
weagle251 says:
@33
We only pipe in crowd noise for the chop blocks, and yes, calling it the Jungle has always been stupid.
August 28th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
42
Tricky Dick says:
[Insert the Alabama Fans and Maggots likeness joke here]
August 28th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
43
DC Trojan says:
Crabapple Buck @ 39 – I’m confused – are you making nice with SC people to lull us into not noticing that we’re only a couple of weeks away from OMG the bestest biggest game EVAR (since the last one) (copyright ESPN), or taking the chance to get a shot in at Notre Dame? Either way, nice work.
August 28th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
44
TIGERinATL2 says:
1) I don’t know any actual AU folks who call JHS “the jungle”. Tuberville floated that when he first arrived and it quighly and rightly sank. Luckily it isn’t preserved for eternity in a half ton of fiberglass.
2) What is this about piping in crowd noise? I don’t recall that ever at JHS.
But anyway, I’ll bet this guy thinks the BDS additions are quite classy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RaiwkFNJYA0&eurl=http://thewareaglereader.wordpress.com/
And has anyone else been having difficulty getting comments to actually post?
August 28th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
45
always rebellious says:
Stupid Yankee companies and their Breaking and Entering prowess.
August 28th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
46
Flatlander says:
/Now living in mortal fear that NU boosters will get a 600 lb. fiberglass version of the corncob-hat installed at 13th & O.
August 28th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
47
JD4AU says:
“a snack stand hawking fried balls of tasty death with the name “Crimson Fried” is an incredible representation of any and all things Alabama.)”
Sadly, you are correct. This is why it is not upsetting to most Auburn fans when bammers attempt to needle us with “Most folks think Auburn is in Georgia.”
August 28th, 2008 at 12:53 pm
48
wdamne says:
I’m sure Tom Arnold will buy all his authentic Tide refreshments under the hat.
August 28th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
49
ChemE93 says:
While it may seem like a convenient out to try to blame the Connecticut Yankees for this, the finger can only be pointed at the bama fan base as a whole for creating the climate where something like this would be contemplated in the first place, nevermind executed and profitable.
August 28th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
50
El Kabong!!! says:
Re: Bryant signing 200 players was his only advantage…
Last time I checked, the NCAA has no scholarship restrictions at any time on those schools. Every school could sign as many players as they want. I don’t see how that changes anything.
August 28th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
51
sevenDs says:
33 and 34,
I think there’s hypocrisy among all fans when it comes to traditions of other schools. The hat (well Bear Bryant) is part of Alabama football and what the rest of us think doesn’t matter.
Piping in crowd noise was ridiculous, but I’m not saying is that this hat is. The Jungle thing wasn’t a big deal to me, I let the PR people do what they want.
There are things I find ridiculous than a houndstooh hat on a concession stand: (in no particular order)
Brutus Buckeye
Notre Dame mystique
The ACC
The So. Cal “war chant” – or what ever it is, you know the peace sign thing
The “Hokie Gobbler” mascot cheer
The nickname “Zips”
National Title aspirations of USC, even with Spurrier
The Tomahawk Chop (although I do like a good chop)
I could go on, but I think I’ve started a bigger fight than I can handle right now.
August 28th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
52
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
College Footbaw Fan Dept:
# 31 – Tater Salad – If ‘Bama were any good I would love to watch them, especially against the Gators and other good SEC teams…
# 39 – Crabapple – Alabama, the Notre Dame of the South? Had not really thought of it that way before, but, you may have a good point there…
..But, if I had to put my pennies on a team, I think Saban has a better chance to getting the program off mediocrappy, while Weis is obviously not big-time, or little-time head coaching material.
August 28th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
53
NewAZTiger says:
#23: I think they already did that in the Iron Bowl – 2002, IIRC.
Then some 4th string white running back ran wild up in that joint, and we ain’t seen the Fedora since. (OK, we have, he’s at Southern Miss)
August 28th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
54
SH says:
I think Jordan-Hare already has a “Pat Dye’s Pants” themed concession stand.
August 28th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
55
drogue says:
Disturbing.
Nuremburg?
August 28th, 2008 at 5:21 pm
56
Stephen says:
#51 and Hugh Jackman.
August 28th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
57
MCab says:
That hat’s not really houndstooth, it’s plaid. Tres rustique’
August 28th, 2008 at 10:53 pm
58
Mitch P. says:
I’m freaking out, I thought this was posted over a month ago…I’m getting deja vu so bad I can physically feel my brain trying to make sense of it.
August 29th, 2008 at 12:07 am
59
MiseanAUFan says:
They are actually going to have Coke, as in Coca-Cola, at Bryant-Denny? When did that change?
August 29th, 2008 at 6:40 am