CURIOUS INDEX, 8/20/08
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Now let’s keep this all in perspective we kid go crazy overboard bonkers. Nick Saban goes ahead and sends Alabama fans flying from their comfortable home in the deliriumsphere and into the Van Allen Belt of Pandeleirum by openly and publicly saying incoming freshman/pogo ninja Julio Jones has been one of the Tide’s best receivers in fall practice. We know and trust that Alabama fans will respond to this news in a measured and rational manner. Julio ain’t got these, though. If NCAA 09 has the math in line, Ben Tate is going to make Jones’ hops look like mere skips. I do box jumps on a bank! That’s not a glitch. That’s just part of the magic Tony Franklin and his enchanted wristbands can work on an offense. Knit one, pearl one. Tennessee gets Brandon Warren, most impressive TE transfer from Florida State, approved by the NCAA to play this year. HUZZAHS! and possum jerky all around. Circle of life tells you your Ace set will have to wait, because UT’s other tight end, Jeff Cottam, has back surgery and will be out 6-8 weeks. HUZZAHS! revoked, but keep possum jerky. Purdue receives no such balance in their news. Purdue loses starting running back Jaycen Taylor for the year with an ACL. Not that Purdue uses this “running back” you speak of, but still. Still more tales of human frailty. Micah Kia, one of three surviving members of the species known as UCLA linemen, broke his hand on a FG block attempt in practice and is “probable” for the opener against Tennessee. The following sentence will break your logic box. Give Rick Neuheisel points for candor: “We’re past ‘overly concerning,’ ” Neuheisel said. “On that Ouija board of concerning, we’re past, ‘overly.’ Yeah, this is concerning, no question about it.” The only solace for Bruins fans is that USC continues to rack up injuries, as well. Running back C.J. Gable suffered ankle and hip strains from a hit he took on a running drill, and is labeled as generically questionable. |
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1
gerry dorsey says:
i think i saw ben tate in a onesie and socks on a trampoline in beijing the other night.
August 20th, 2008 at 8:24 am
2
sullivan013 says:
I believe you violated about twenty rules of grammer, sentence structure and logic by including the words ‘Alabama fans’, ‘measured’ and ‘rational’ in the same sentence. The errors are compounded by including the offending sentence within a paragraph that includes both ‘Saban’ and ‘Julio Jones.’
Bad dog. Bad dog. No biscuit.
August 20th, 2008 at 8:27 am
3
Brewdog says:
Now how is UCLA supposed to hang an opening day loss on Tennessee when stuff like that keeps happening? Come on! The Bruins are going to ruin my Labor Day cookout.
August 20th, 2008 at 8:43 am
4
blon57 says:
UT isn’t so milque toast after all.
http://www.kgbt4.com/sports/video.aspx?id=177152
August 20th, 2008 at 9:09 am
5
Etch Westgrin says:
#2 – it’s “grammar” barnar.
August 20th, 2008 at 9:13 am
6
Julio's stiff arm says:
#5…Coffee. Nose. Keyboard
August 20th, 2008 at 9:18 am
7
Julio's baby arm says:
#6…. this should have been your name.
August 20th, 2008 at 9:27 am
8
psuphiman80 says:
June Jones laughs at this thing called running back.
August 20th, 2008 at 9:44 am
9
Terrence Cody's gravitational field says:
#7…nah….maybe this
August 20th, 2008 at 9:46 am
10
Julio's Stiff Baby Arm says:
@ 6 & 7
Read it and weep.
August 20th, 2008 at 9:49 am
11
decemberist says:
Julio Jones saved my cat from high up in a tree on Hackberry Lane yesterday before practice!
August 20th, 2008 at 10:17 am
12
gerry dorsey says:
dude…you have a cat?? gay.
August 20th, 2008 at 10:20 am
13
NewAZTiger says:
CRABCAKE!!!
August 20th, 2008 at 10:23 am
14
adolph olive bush says:
Here’s the play to which Saban refers:
http://i34.tinypic.com/34takwj.gif
August 20th, 2008 at 10:38 am
15
SpookyJuice says:
Nah….Tate ain’t got them hops. Julio just flew in undetected and unseen, picked him up and dropped him on his ass.
August 20th, 2008 at 10:51 am
16
reallybored says:
Alright linguists, how is Julio Jones pronounced?
Is it:
“hulio” jones? “J” pronounced “h” as in Tejas and junta.
“hulio hones”?
“walio wones”? “Ju” pronounced “wa” as in Tijuana and Juan.
Why is “hacienda” not spelled jacienda? And if “j” is “h”, why is Mexico pronounced meh he co?
August 20th, 2008 at 11:08 am
17
yoyofutbawl says:
11
Saving a cat from a tree? Sounds like a code phrase for chasing pussy & drankin underage at The Booth.
August 20th, 2008 at 11:22 am
18
matt says:
afc scout at practice compares julio to randy moss, says he might be the best wide receiver to come along in decades:
http://today.sportingnews.com/sportingnewstoday/20080819/?pg=22&pm=1&u1=friend&search=%22julio+jones%22+%22matt+hayes%22&cookies=1
August 20th, 2008 at 11:43 am
19
InsaneCoachPosse says:
Damn those NCAA ‘09 people for letting Auburn’s super secret “Flubber Offense” out of the bag!!!
August 20th, 2008 at 11:43 am
20
The Song of Hiawatha Francisco says:
@16: I vote HOO-lee-o HO-nays. It’s a vote for consistency. Joe Morgan would approve.
August 20th, 2008 at 11:51 am
21
John says:
#17, The Booth was closed long before JJ got to campus. And the pussy be chasing him. Or so I’ve heard.
August 20th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
22
decemberist says:
I think it should be shortened to JuJo (& pronounced Hoo-Jo).
Certainly JuJo will be a household nickname across Alabama by the Arkansas (pronounced Arkansaw )game??
August 20th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
23
Anonymous IV says:
#16, the answer to the last question is that hacienda is a Spanish word and the name of Mexico is derived from Nahuatl.
According to the Real Academica Española hacienda comes from the Latin facienda.
The closest approximation on how a native English speaker should pronounce the name Julio, without using the International Phonetic Alphabet, would be “Who-Lee-oh.”
I am not a linguist, but I suffered through linguistic courses as both an undergrad and grad.
August 20th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
24
matt says:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLkSOWqVz-o
August 20th, 2008 at 6:37 pm
25
Wes says:
Tony Franklin system bitches! Only $2,965 on Ebay. Julio Jones can certainly do that, once he gets a little bit of that Jimmy Johns product in him right around week 4, is arrested in Tuscaloosa, and is promptly suspended for pre-game warm-ups in accordance with Saban’s discipline policy.
August 20th, 2008 at 6:43 pm
26
hunglikehussein says:
@23
Never in my wildest dreams would/should I hear a “rap sonnet” combining the words…..mafia, “lot to ya”, opera and tilapia (fish).
Btw, excellent stiff arm.
Anon4… if you are interested, an excellent source for pronunciation is…http://www.research.att.com/~ttsweb/tts/demo.php
August 20th, 2008 at 7:50 pm