YOU'RE NOT VERY TOUGH.

by Orson on Aug 19, 2008 12:18 PM EDT

Hey. YOU!!!

You're not very tough, or at least that's what the Dapper Don thinks.

Texas always has a very polished team that has great talent, but they arent tough, they arent a physically tough team...My defense will get to a point where they will be mean, nasty and ornery bastards and thats what you need for Texas. Texas will move the ball with tit-for-tat, screens and options, but well make them pay a price whenever they catch one of those dinky passes. Well put three hats on them and make them not want to get up, thats the way to beat Texas."

Schnellenberger just called you a man too afraid to wear suspenders, Texas. Or he did this, like, a week ago and we didn't notice. FAU does play hard--their first half against Florida last year was feisty, and only the inevitable talent differential landslide buried them. The knock against Texas not being physical seems odd, though: a top ten run defense, a 17th-ranked run offense, both harbingers of what we would dub a "physical" football team.

We mean, um, YES SCHNELLY. We bring you offerings of our finest retiree-grade rum and Marshall's menswear in tribute.

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Are we sure that’s not a picture of Bela Karolyi yelling at Haley LeFontaine to “stop cryign and act like a man?”

I loved Howie at Louisville, and I am thoroughly enjoying his batshit loony later years. FAU provides real value every time.

by jon on Aug 19, 2008 12:31 PM EDT reply actions

“We bring you offerings of our finest retiree-grade rum and Marshalls menswear in tribute.”

Jobu politely asks Schnelly to stop stealing from him. It is very bad to steal Jobu’s rum. Very bad.

by The Song of Hiawatha Francisco on Aug 19, 2008 12:45 PM EDT reply actions

Howard is like 80 and he’s a man!

by croc on Aug 19, 2008 12:51 PM EDT reply actions

Smellsofbourbon v. Texas…

Can I vote for “Black Sunday blimp”?

by Soonertruth on Aug 19, 2008 12:59 PM EDT reply actions

I bet all the land thieves remember the infamous quote, “They’ll write books and make movies about my time here.” And then he became a bond salesman for a while.

Do I need to say more?

by blon57 on Aug 19, 2008 1:02 PM EDT reply actions

@2-

+ 1.

Hey bartender! Jobu needs a refill…

by Tater Salad on Aug 19, 2008 1:10 PM EDT reply actions

The last thing FAU wants is a motivated Texas team. This does not bode well for our owl friends.

by ClemsonHorn on Aug 19, 2008 1:13 PM EDT reply actions

A motivated Texas team would be a lovely site in Austin. For all the talent we had, at times it seems that they were just phoning it in last year. We lost one we shouldn’t have and came close to losing a few others. Well, we had two loses that shouldn’t have happened. Texas was a better team in both cases.

by blon57 on Aug 19, 2008 1:32 PM EDT reply actions

…a lovely sight…

I’ve been typing the word web site all morning. It stuck.

by blon57 on Aug 19, 2008 1:34 PM EDT reply actions

This blog is trurning into Every Day Should Be Schnellenberger’s.

by yoyofutbawl on Aug 19, 2008 1:45 PM EDT reply actions

It takes a real man to stroll around in a pink, button-down collar.
A man who fears no mortals.
A moonshine-swilling, no-mortal fearing, pink button-down wearing man.
And Howard IS. THAT. MAN.

by GamecockTony on Aug 19, 2008 1:47 PM EDT reply actions

@6: /Tater Salad Takes Thrown Bat to Skull

@10: Every day is Schnellenberger’s.

by The Song of Hiawatha Francisco on Aug 19, 2008 1:57 PM EDT reply actions

I’m afraid Texas is going to make those poor FAU boys pay for Schnellenberger’s remarks in blood and bruises.

by Brewdog on Aug 19, 2008 2:26 PM EDT reply actions

Remember, this guy played for Bear at UK, where he would routinely pelt his players senseless with lumps of coal if they blocked or tackled poorly, then send them to clean stables laden with horseshit all night long.

by yoyofutbawl on Aug 19, 2008 2:43 PM EDT reply actions

Says right here on my pay-stub that I’m the defensive coordinator of the Texas Longhorns.

Ole’ Schnelly’s Alzheimer’s must be kickin’ in. We’re bringing the Boom and the Motherfuckers.

by Will Muschamp on Aug 19, 2008 3:00 PM EDT reply actions

@15: Just bring the Boom. Schnellenberger is the only motherfucker on the field. (No, seriously. I’m pretty sure he fucked all of our mothers.)

by The Song of Hiawatha Francisco on Aug 19, 2008 3:51 PM EDT reply actions

“The knock against Texas not being physical seems odd”

Outside of 2004 and 2005, in the last 10 years, when hasn’t the knock on UT been their Charmen softness? Chris Simms in woman’s panties? Rose in the front, big guy? Have we forgotten already?

by meatybob on Aug 19, 2008 4:49 PM EDT reply actions

2005 and 2006, that is.

by meatybob on Aug 19, 2008 5:01 PM EDT reply actions

- he’s said that everywhere he goes – get with the program

as for texass…yes, other than vince young, they are heartless giveups who make excuses when they lose and who never live up to their talent or expectations – it’s kindof what they do

by okiedomer on Aug 19, 2008 8:03 PM EDT reply actions

#19

And OU was stupid enough to hire him. And John Blake.

by blon57 on Aug 19, 2008 8:24 PM EDT reply actions

The dream lives on.

The Owls won the New Orleans Bowl.

by Bradley on Aug 19, 2008 10:48 PM EDT reply actions

I have it on good authority that Schnellenberger had the FAU players doing wind sprints on the beach with jellyfish stuffed in their jocks during while tropical storm Fay was passing by yesterday.

He, of course, was there in a tie, blazer and $800 shoes. Never got wet, either.

by Gator on Aug 19, 2008 11:38 PM EDT reply actions