Blogtoberfest: for when ADD is too slow.

All five parts of J. Leman Saves the World are now available at BHGP. Watch, savor, and thank your lucky stars there's men like like J Leman between you and the dark forces that plot at night to slaughter you in your bed.

The Feldblog has at least four things of necessary quality: Auburn's o-line enters the season banged up, Charlie Weis won't drink in public and he's not alone among coaches, UCLA's o-line attrition is plagueriffic, and Alex Mack, Cal center, personifies the colloquial definition of his name. Digest in total, and yes, we'll take care of your creeping desire to hear "Return of the Mack" by Mark Morrison in return.

Florida allegedly has the easiest schedule in the SEC, which is a relative term, but we'll take it after the horrorshow of recent slates for Florida.

The Red Raiders defense gets the mandatory "improved, improving, excited" trifecta fluff piece here.

House of Sparky digs out more fun news for Arizona State: their center has gone down with a concussion, which is really unfair since that's Rudy's job on the Sun Devils, not his.

Mike Barwis for President. Making this nation stronger and safer through weighted sprints and Olympic lifting.

After the jump...horror. We warned you: courtesy of tipmeister Dave, the nastiest concoction we've ever seen lies after the jump. If you dare, fair reader. If. You. Dare.