NOTRE DAME GETS THEIR TWEAK ON
Every now and then Notre Dame’s administration does something so absolutely bitchwhittled it boggles the mind and forces us to do things like make up completely fake words like “bitchwhittled” to capture just how stupid, misguided, and heavy-handed said thing is.
This? Astonishingly bitchwhittled. The litmus test for something being bitchwhittled is imagining Betty White, and then imagining Betty White seeing the event/affair/concept in question, and then imagining if she would discharge bullets into said thing.
For the record, Betty White thinks this thing is utterly bitchwhittled.
Big ups to fate for making us defend something a Clausen didn’t even clearly do, though it’s probably a good guess he’s drinking beer there, which underage college students do frequently. Though, it should be noted, they usually don’t have a special garment for beer drinking, though that is kind of a cool idea. “Beersworthy! Fetch me my drinking jacket!”
(HT: Deadspin, which is kind of like shouting out the water company for your last glass of H2O, but there we are.)
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lawya1:
“My firned got caught “in the act” by a Nun no less at a girl’s dorm on campus (McGlinn) and they were both expelled. He enrolled at Miami and reapplied a year later.”
That they got caught both a) breaking parietals AND b) “in the act” is what did them in, as premarital sex is also against the student code of conduct, as you would expect at a Catholic university. Only a) or b) would have gotten them merely tossed from their dorms.
Used to room with a Student Honor Board member. Learned all the fine shades of crime-and-punishment in regards to ND and SMC……
Comment by GeronimoRumplestiltskin — August 6, 2008 @ 11:56 am
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ND in regards to being in opposite sex’s room after midnight:
The rules for ND’s dorms are called parietals. Simply, you cannot be in a dorm (past the lobby) of the opposite sex (ND does not have co-ed dorms) after midnight on weeknights and after 2am on weekends.
If you are caught, a hearing is held. Occasionally, if the infraction was less than a half hour or if the student can convince the rector that it was a pure, 100%, swear-on-a-Bible accident, the student may not get booted out of his dorm. This rarely happens, and usually the student is forced to find off-campus lodging for the remainder of the school year. He/she may petition for dorm re-admittance for the next school year. No student, to my knowledge, has ever been expelled from the school for a parietals violation.
Parietals violations have cost ND on the football field, which, I believe, is what Expat Ohioan is referring to. Up until recently, ND had a rule that any athlete playing a varsity sport had to live on campus. Therefore, if an athlete got kicked out of his dorm, he was no longer allowed to play varsity sports. This is what happened to RB Randy Kinder prior to the 1996 Orange Bowl, and Tony Driver (?, or Tony Fisher, I get my Tonys mixed up) also missed most of the 1999 season due to being kicked off campus for a parietals violation in late September. However, neither player was dismissed from school.
Of course, some players would clandestinely get around the “varsity athletes must live on campus rule”: they would have an off-campus apartment (unknown to his dorm’s rector or to the University), but still maintain their dorm residence - get their mail there, show up for dorm meetings, etc. The ones that did this were pretty good at it, too: Justin Goheen (captain in 1994) “lived” in my dorm that year, and I didn’t know that he didn’t actually “live” there until around February, and only because I heard it from his “roommate”. However, if you were officially kicked out, the university would no longer be in the dark as to your actual residence, and for an athlete, that was the end of their season.
The “varsity athletes must live on campus rule” was altered a few years ago to allow varsity athletes in their senior year to live off-campus.
Comment by GeronimoRumplestiltskin — August 6, 2008 @ 11:50 am
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Fair enough, mq. I just thought I was in for another round of “look how mean the Tribune is being to us!” martyrdom on the part of ND fans, when in fact, the overwhelming majority of ND coverage in that paper is of the positive variety (Avani Patel’s coverage could accurately be described as “fawning” when she was on the beat).
Also, when your head coach/SID routinely punishes reporters from other outlets whose coverage he doesn’t like (by pulling credentials, etc.), it tends to make other writers on that beat more adversarial, too. Just a thought.
I guess I just come from the position of a fan of a team who’s closest metro daily (the Indy Star) won’t even send a beat writer up to our home games — a whopping 50 miles away — and can barely be bothered to run a boxscore and a two-sentence recap of our games half the time. Meanwhile, whenever there’s a hint of crime or scandal on campus, they camp out for weeks. Comparatively, I’m not sure ND fans appreciate just how good they have it with the Tribune.
Comment by Papa Lou BSU — August 5, 2008 @ 4:32 pm
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@30,
Note that I don’t blame TBL, Deadspin, EDSBS, or any other blog for having fun with it. Where I take issue is with the particular “journalist” who “broke” the story and, I have a hunch, alerted ND admins while getting quotes for his new-found story, gets to continue covering ND as a paid-in-actual-money-beat-writer while thus far displaying less actual knowledge of the football program or the school than your average deaf, dumb, and blind 90 year old Iraqi.
It’s non-news. It’s great blog fodder. But the Tribune’s essentially given up on using whatever access they have with the program to develop actual stories.
Comment by domer.mq — August 5, 2008 @ 3:27 pm