CURIOUS INDEX, 8/5/2008

by Orson on Aug 5, 2008 9:33 AM EDT

We prefer to think of them as an entrepreneurial youth group. Missouri redshirt freshman safety Gilbert Moye has interests including networking with other young urban youth, the color blue, and interpretive hand signal exchange. David Boren just told Bob Stoops to kick him off the team, and wants none of these excuses about him going to another university with an entirely different football team.

SMQ kindly points out to Stoops that no significant members of "the internet culture" called for Josh Jarboe's removal; in fact, prior to the day of Josh Jarboe's dismissal, neither did Stoops. The unsubstantiated but persistent rumor you will hear on the internets culture is that the order came directly from OU President David Boren, which makes sense. You would have to deliberate for days to come up with a response as harebrained and trigger-happy (get it?) as the decision to boot Jarboe; being a former Senator, bad decision-making and nitwit policy flow from him naturally.

(Big ups to Boren for the Boren National Security Language Fellowship, though. Let's not be totally unfair, here...just slightly unfair.)

I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS. All-Caps Mike Gundy ENJOYS THE TASTE OF RED BULL. He says he sticks to coffee until around 11 in the morning. We assume "coffee" means "espresso poured directly into eyeball because HE IS MAN 40 ETCETERA RAAAARRRGGH.

Ed Orgeron was the last coach we could remember being an avowed Red Bull drinker. If Gundy loses his job after the season, we'll call it a trend of two: declare love for Red Bull publicly as a coach, and then immediately lose job.

It also explains some things of course. Contrast exhibit A:

"When you combine those two together, you always have a risk," he said. According to Clemens, some major concerns with mixing these two drinks include, but are not limited to, cardiovascular risk, impaired judgment, shortness of breath, dizziness, disorientation and rapid heart beat.

Exhibit B:

It gives you STROOOOOOOOOOOOOKES!!!

Joel, who has a thing for fonts and logos, analyzes both the scariest (eep!) and the blandest of logos. Air Force really deserves better, but our suggestion of a mushroom-cloud font would have only flown through the approval process at the peak of the cold war.

Cocaine is funny except when it isn't. John Reaves, the one-time Gator great, is arrested for cocaine possession, but only after pointing a gun at two men in an altercation. How the hell do you get to 58 being a cocaine addict? Do you have a heart you use only on weekends and a removable septum?

George O'Leary speaks to the Orlando Sentinel for UCF's Media Day. That's so nice of him.

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“Do you have a heart you use only on weekends and a removable septum?”
Medical technology is incredible. Someday. Someday.

And, who did O’Leary go as to Media Day?

by GamecockTony on Aug 5, 2008 9:40 AM EDT reply actions

Boren tells Stoops to kick a player of Mizzou’s team. Big 12 is one f’ed up league.

by JD4AU on Aug 5, 2008 9:44 AM EDT reply actions

Nevermind about #2.

“2d Cup of Coffee” = “Increased Reading Comprehension Skills”

by JD4AU on Aug 5, 2008 9:52 AM EDT reply actions

the Sentinel should bring the AD from Barry University to media day (I don’t even know if they have an athletic program, but I really don’t think it matters for the purposes of this) and tell O’Leary that they were “tired of waiting” and “had to move on”

by rjsplow on Aug 5, 2008 9:56 AM EDT reply actions

Thanks for clearing up the situation with Jarboe. I should have known something was up. OU doesn’t just dismiss players unless they are under indictment for rape, cocaine distribution, etc.

by blon57 on Aug 5, 2008 10:16 AM EDT reply actions

Gilbert Moye + Myspace: Making Columbia’s Gang Task Force look like Scotland Yard since 2008.

Gary Pinkel? Not so much.

/Iowa City Police Department

by Der Schatten on Aug 5, 2008 10:37 AM EDT reply actions

O’Leary’s opening statement:

“Good morning, I’d like to thank everyone for being here today, particularly the folks from the Orlando Sentinel. Recent controversies aside, I hope there won’t be any lasting bad blood between us, because as someone who earned a master’s degree from the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism, I know how hard each and every one of you work, every day . . . "

by Doug on Aug 5, 2008 10:40 AM EDT reply actions

Orson —

Trying to e-mail you an interview request. I’m rolling craps with the “harrumph” thingy. Any suggestions?

Thanks,

gurn

by gurn on Aug 5, 2008 10:45 AM EDT reply actions

Orson – I don’t think it was hare-brained and trigger happy to dismiss Jarboe. We were the first to market in weaponry in our athletic dorms in the 80s. I see no need to lap the field in 2008. I also am stunned that I am not being considered a “significant member of the internet culture”.

by HeadThief on Aug 5, 2008 10:52 AM EDT reply actions

UK’s QB now?
Pulley is now off the team
Hartline, step right up

by SEC Haiku on Aug 5, 2008 10:53 AM EDT reply actions

I only argument I have against SMQ is that an athletic scholarship isn’t exactly a constitutional right. If OU does this purely for PR reasons, what is the big deal? Besides, he will end up at the North Texases or the East Carolinas of the world anyway, see Randy Moss.

by meatybob on Aug 5, 2008 10:58 AM EDT reply actions

Rollo – The article said that the police were looking for Dewberry to file criminal damage charges. Instead of actually being arrested, he agreed to make restitution. In exchange, the hospital agreed not to press charges. Sort of a pretrial diversionary program. I think 1 point is fair in light of the fact that the damages exceeded $2000.

If you are going to take out your anger on inanimate objects, it would be best to do it without the video camera rolling.

by hobeg8r on Aug 5, 2008 11:19 AM EDT reply actions

“Cocaine’s a helluva drug”…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kEryR5wj9o&feature=related

by Excuse me Stewardess, but I speak jive on Aug 5, 2008 11:21 AM EDT reply actions

It would also be best to post my response to the correct article.

by hobeg8r on Aug 5, 2008 11:21 AM EDT reply actions

#11

Jarboe should consider Okie St. They don’t seem concerned about players with past history, like sex with an underage girl. Guns are definitley not a problem.

by blon57 on Aug 5, 2008 11:22 AM EDT reply actions

Logos! Yes! I love logos!

The interlocking AF for Air Force isn’t the new PR-firm inspired one. They’ve got this crazy falcon zooming down with lightening bolts one too.

My personal favorite is the Zips. I have to say, a kangaroo is an awesome choice for a school in Ohio.

by Gen. Stoopnagle on Aug 5, 2008 11:31 AM EDT reply actions

“Missouri redshirt freshman safety Gilbert Moye has interests including networking with other young urban youth, the color blue, and interpretive hand signal exchange. David Boren just told Bob Stoops to kick him off the team, and wants none of these excuses about him going to another university with an entirely different football team.”

Ummm. David Boren has nothing to do with any Missery redshirt freshmen.
David Boren may or may not have asked Bob Stoops to kick Josh Jarboe off the team.

by OkieRover on Aug 6, 2008 9:51 AM EDT reply actions