A FAREWELL TO AMOROUS BIG CATS
Orgeron. Perrilloux. SLOCUM? One by one, our best material has gone gently into that good night of jucos and position coaching, and today we hear rumblings that an EDSBS Most Favored Son is an academic casualty and a Wolverine no more.
In his own words, we give you Marques Slocum, remixed in sonnet-ish form. Read, remember, and mourn.
got a fuck lion now come fuck wit me
i hope my wife know ima be man! fuck dat spider
I like 2 licky licky licky licky
My mom CARLA i think she da realest bitch alive
im fuckin wit a rock or a pit just so it can cha cat
yea, beerfest bitch! im ready 4 da boot!
come on now! what type of question is dat?
why da fuck am i doin dis interview
shit i at least get a bird bath but yea i shower everyday
opera- no, musical- no, play- no, performance- fuuuuuuuuuuuck no
come on now i wanna fly i hate walkin dat shit overrated
u just fucked up da mood, i guess i aint sayin no more jokes
i dont give a fuck i just want 2 get on
sprint/nextel bitch! dey got da best phones
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40
Doug @ 36 - Cocktails!
Comment by OhioDawg — July 18, 2008 @ 1:16 pm
39
SocalBrian, you can find the original by clicking the link “in his own words”. I thought that’d be pretty elementary, it’s just that this is too difficult to believe it’s not; i didn’t know anyone could be that stupid.
Comment by Ninja Football — July 18, 2008 @ 11:40 am
38
@28
You answer with “the Power of TROOF”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwsWskgKe5E
Comment by hunglikehussain — July 18, 2008 @ 10:10 am
37
shoot, change that major from ‘pre-business’ to ‘advanced urban floetry’. Problem solved, fuck lion & CARLA can keep it REaLZZ.
Comment by decemberist — July 18, 2008 @ 9:51 am
36
And it seems to me you lived your life like a Wolverine in the wind
Never knowing who to licky licky when the spiders came in
I would’ve liked to have known you, but I was just a kid
Your candle burned out long before
Your fuck lion ever did.
Comment by Doug — July 18, 2008 @ 9:34 am
35
Farewell Marques,
May your future be full of milk and cookies,… and be free of performance art.
Comment by CincySooner — July 18, 2008 @ 8:19 am
34
“I like 2 licky licky licky licky.”
Can you all make sure that’s on my headstone?
Thanks.
Comment by GamecockTony — July 18, 2008 @ 7:56 am
33
Does Slocum smoke real cigarettes? I think he may have been with this kid.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLeVlBca5lg
Comment by socalbryan — July 18, 2008 @ 12:58 am
32
where can i see this guy’s original statement? it’s just that this is too difficult to believe; i didn’t know anyone could be that stupid.
Comment by socalbryan — July 18, 2008 @ 12:50 am
31
aye mateys - tis a sad thing to see the merry clown leave the stage
but me experiences says there’s plenty more where that came from… just start laying microphones in the bushes near the dorms of Florida or Kansas State… next thing yanno, wonderful witicisms are recorded and translated for our amusement
now where’s my midget in a suitcase?
Comment by Pirate Petey — July 17, 2008 @ 8:45 pm