CORRECTIONS, 7/11/2008
Last week’s news wire ran an item from Reuters stating that Colombian politician and activist Ingrid Betancourt was freed from captivity by Colombian soldiers. New photographic information suggests that her release was orchestrated by a lone hero, whose photo appears below.

More information as it becomes available. We regret the error.
Monday’s Weekend Legal Wrap reported that Kentucky coach Rich Brooks had been spotted last week striding into the U.S. Supreme Court to deliver an impassioned argument against overturning the Washington, D.C. gun ownership ban. Coach Brooks has since informed us that while he has never visited the nation’s capital nor made any public statement regarding his feelings on the Second Amendment, he believes a good squirrel knife ought to be enough for anyone.
We regret the error.
In Thursday’s “Cookin’ With Coach” segment, we listed the ingredients for Nick Sabans famous “‘Nickerdoodles” inaccurately. The revised ingredient list follows:
* 1/2 cup butter, softened
* 1/2 cup shortening
* 1 1/2 cups white sugar
* 2 eggs, preferably crushed by a hand in an iron glove
* 3 tbsp rageberry
* 2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
* 2 teaspoons cream of tartar
* 1 cup, tears of underlings
* 1 teaspoon baking soda
* 1/4 teaspoon salt
* 2 teaspoons vanilla extracted from the bones of live, hand-pressed vanilla minks.
* 2 tablespoons white sugar
* 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
* 5 quarts whole mortal innocent human blood
“It’s the blood that gives it the chewy edge and spongy middle,” said Saban via phone on Tuesday. “The cream of tartar helps, too. But it’s mostly about the blood.”
We regret the error.
Tuesday’s Curious Index contained an inaccurate item. We reported that former Ohio State standout and current ESPN analyst Chris Spielman has gained offseason notoriety as an extremely proficient clarinetist. Mr. Spielman is, in fact, a world-class oboe player. We regret the error.
In Wednesday’s “ten best players you’ve never heard of,” we described division 1-AA defensive all-star and Appalachian State Mountaineer Cookieland Seasyde Hollyberry as “The most explosive and underhyped defensive end of his generation, a block-shredding menace with a stance like a waterbug’s and speed to match. How he fell to to the Mountaineers, we’ll never know. With Cookieland on board, however, Michigan won’t be the only big team to wind up on the snack plate for the boys from Boone!”
Cookieland Seasyde Hollyberry is not actually a football player, but is instead a prize pointer who placed second in the 2008 Westminster Dog Show.
We regret the error.
Tuesday’s profile of former Oklahoma quarterback Rhett Bomar contained several inaccuracies. Contrary to our reporting, Rhett Bomar does not sell Tennessee ham at a roadside stand on Highway 109. This is the plot of a hit Dixie Chicks single. Bomar is currently enrolled in Sam Houston State University, which, also contrary to our reporting, is an accredited university with an actual football program.
Bomar also has never killed a man he was in an abusive relationship and dumped his body in a lake. This is also from the plot of a hit Dixie Chicks song.
We regret the error.
Monday’s feature on contained a photograph that this paper admits was altered by the staff. The photo that should have appeared with the piece on comes from ’s official site, and is an unaltered photo of the coach.

The photo that appeared with “Tommy Bowden:Attack Dog for the American Football Establishment”, where Tommy Bowden was quoted at a recent boosters’ meeting as decrying “the anonymous slander and mindless mean-spirited BS of blogs.” This paper then answered his critique in hasty, unthinking fashion. It would not turn out to be a good decision on the part of management, and we acknowledge this.
The picture accompanying the piece follows below, and represents a sad and juvenile moment of poor judgment by our editors.

We apologize for any harm or hurt inflicted by the piece, and sincerely regret the error.









51
SpartanDan says:
Add another one to the “Coop is utterly, laughably wrong” camp. The recent Corrections haven’t been as good as the first few batches, but that’s kind of like bitching that after a first-round 59, you “only” managed to shoot 65 in the second. Most people’s best writing can’t match the worst I’ve seen here.
July 12th, 2008 at 12:26 am
52
Rob says:
Corrections = super lols
July 12th, 2008 at 1:21 am
53
Rob says:
Incidentally, is there a form I can fill out to opt out of being represented by cranky bastards with sand in their vaginas?
July 12th, 2008 at 1:22 am
54
Flatlander says:
Nickerdoodles. awesome.
Does this mean Tommy ‘Tuber’ville has a potato recipe for us?
July 12th, 2008 at 8:44 am
55
The Bengal says:
hunglikehussain @ 32
Was that Colonel Angus in that picture?
July 12th, 2008 at 9:56 am
56
bamacheryl says:
I absolutely think I’ll be trying out the Nickerdoodles for my kickoff party for the Bama/Clemson game. Should be a big hit!
July 12th, 2008 at 11:17 am
57
Pirate Petey says:
arrrr me little mateys… ye sure love to stir up a tempest in a teapot when there’s no pigskin topics to discuss
I have one question for whoever authored those photos… is someone photoshopping Tuberville’s ears onto Bowden’s head or is this just one of those ‘right after the shower’ moments?
wait… the photo is from LSUfreek – probably each ear is composed of thousands of pixels of Dumbo’s ears…loveingly assembled in the shape of a ‘D’ to resemble the NotreDame logo
and the tie is likely ’shopped from the bikini spread the “BearBryant twins” are doing for the upcoming Playboy spread on college girls
quite a work of art there ya swabby
July 12th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
58
hunglikehussain says:
@55
Could be, although the Cuhnal ’round ’bout these part is busy as a bee burnin’ the brush. Keeps the ticks and fleas at bay.
July 12th, 2008 at 7:06 pm