HULK APPRECIATE NEED FOR INTERNET SATIRE
Hulk love his lawyer Murray Abramowitz of Abramowitz, Hagen, Howard, Stern and Kern. Murray always send birthday card, remember birthday. MURRAY MAKE HULK RAGE WITH HAPPINESS for good service. HULK APPROVE AND PAY PROMPTLY!
Murray do too good of job sometime. Like Hulk when he mean smash bad man with meteorite and accidentally poison city block with radiation. HULK VERY SORRY ABOUT THAT!!! Hulk direct inquiries to ACE ATTORNEY MURRAY ABRAMOWITZ. Hulk decline further comment.
Murray send Hulk pic. Hulk view with new iPhone 3G. HULK RICH! Hulk smash first two typing email before getting hang of it. HULK FINGERS BREAK PHONE! Hulk get hang of it, though.
Murray say this actionable. Hulk look.
Murray be like Hulk! Want smash fair use of image for satire. HULK LAUGH! Hulk appreciate use of image for purposes make laugh. Also like comparison between Hulk, Les Miles. Les Miles also able live through being bombarded with nuclear radiation! Hulk make Stillwater Oklahoma joke! HULK PUNCHY TODAY!
Hulk tell Murray relax and have colada. Murray say abuse of image. Hulk know value of image! HULK NOT TOLERATE OVEREXPOSURE! Hulk show Murray real worry for Hulk. Hulk see on gas pump this weekend. HULK SMASH GAS STATION AND TAQUITO ROLLER WHEN HULK SEE IT! Blame agent, not Hulk.
HULK WANT FIRE AGENT AFTER SEE THIS! Icy sugar juice flavored with corn syrup. Hulk not approve of American slavery to corn lobby. CORN FOR PIGS NOT MEN! Hulk also disapprove of HFCS as sweetener.
Radiation not funny, either! Radiation turn nice man Bruce Banner into ME! HULK ANGRY AT COMMERCIAL OVEREXPLOITATION, MISUNDERSTANDING OF GAMMA RADIATION! Classroom need moment of science! Hulk support education reform along with close celebrity friends Laurence Fishburne, George Clooney. Fundraiser later this month in Aspen! THIS NOT HELP!
Hulk also not believe gall to offer free taquito with three. WHO BUY THREE TAQUITO AT 7-11! Hulk think if want to die, faster ways, like fight with The Abomination or bullet through head. HULK DISAPPOINTED IN USE OF NAME AS VERB! HULK MEAN “SMASH!,” NOT “EAT FOUR TAQUITOS WHILE DRINK GREEN CORN SYRUP IN CAR!”
Hulk not this angry since Ed Norton write boring drama script. Try turn Hulk into dramatic vehicle. HULK HATE WRITER/ACTOR/DIRECTOR COMBOS! Specialization key to all industrial success. Why not Yale man understand? HULK HATE POMPOUS ASSBAG YALIES. He lack definition in American History X, too. Hulk needed work at time! Could have personal trained!
Hulk conclude. HULK TALK WITH AGENT AFTER GET BACK FROM TURKS AND CAICOS! First Hulk enjoy last day with date for week on beach. HULK NOT KISS AND TELL! Hulk totally tell: Lauren Conrad. Hulk finally find woman to accomodate special size requirement! Hulk now slightly daunted!
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1
OrangeRedBlueBlack says:
I appreciate the comparison to Les, but wouldn’t the more appropriate comparison be Joe Kines?
“GOTTA FINDA WAYA STOP DINSYDE TRAP! OFFENSIVELY YAW HAW BALL IN THE ENDZONE YAW! SMASH!”
June 17th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
2
DC Trojan says:
Hulk should talk to Murray about the ramifications that Lauren Conrad has a wizard’s sleeve, or perhaps more of a canyon than an arroyo. She might not be pleased for that to get out. As it were.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
3
DC Trojan says:
Of the ramifications of revealing that…
dammit.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
4
OrangeRedBlueBlack says:
Honorable mention: Will Muschamp (BOOM) and Ed Orgeron (OY OY OY FOOTBALL)
June 17th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
5
Chips O'Toole says:
Hulk read Omnivore’s Dilemma and Hulk support sustainable farming?
June 17th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
6
Holly says:
Hulk read Omnivore’s Dilemma and Hulk support sustainable farming?
+many
June 17th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
7
Orson Swindle says:
Hulk keep his own chickens, and approve of sustainable farm!
June 17th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
8
Maize n Brew Dave says:
Holy crap that was funny.
“Hulk not approve of American slavery to corn lobby.” – Best. Hulk. Line. Ever.
Hulk Lobby Congress. Hulk smash corn subsidies provide sustainable farming platform. Send money HulkPAC. Hulk no get office on K Street. Promise.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
9
Out of Conference says:
I think only the Heisenberg uncertainty principle can properly be used to explain Hulk/Les’s position on the corn lobby with regards to corn dog loving LSU fans.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
10
John says:
Awesome post! The education fundraiser part killed me.
And 7-11 taquitos are a top guilty pleasure of mine.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
11
Coop says:
@ 9 – Nice. Favorite Gamecock, by far.
Pollan merely came to the same conclusion Thomas Jefferson did over 200 years ago, but for different reasons.
Anyway, call me when everyone’s boss cuts their workweek in half so they can grow and kill their own breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
Until then, he made some rather large assumptions about the American population, at large, that I don’t think are true.
People have an overall understanding of how that #4 value meal arrived on their plastic tray, they merely don’t care.
And, as someone who worked on a farm a couple of summers in high school, raising cattle for slaughter, I know exactly what it is I am cutting into to at dinner, and it does not bother me in the least.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
12
Harris says:
Clearly Hulk is a proponent of organic and sustainable farming, but what is his position on genetically-modified crops for use in marginal agricultural areas? Would Hulk smash ADM?
June 17th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
13
Brian O'Blivion says:
The first Hulk movie was 2 hours I’ll never get back. It was really bad, like Catwoman bad. Chronicles of Riddick bad.
Now they bring back CG Hulk, with the as-if-the-first-one-never-happened title. Not this time fellas.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:52 pm
14
OhioDawg says:
READER LAUGH HARD AT PUNY POST! NOT SMASH TV ON DESK!
June 17th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
15
Bama_Buck says:
What’s going on in this clip?
The hulk (Miles) is holding something, he does a pelvic thrust and a huge object shoots out of his stomach knocking Saban against a tree?
June 17th, 2008 at 1:16 pm
16
jakldawg says:
Would Agriculture Secretary Hulk approve of increased irradiation of foods in order to lessen the outbreaks of food poisoning? All I know is that delicious drink has inspired me to drink a Mountain Dew in the radioisotope lab and see what happens. I’ll either be sternly reprimanded, or turn more awesome.
June 17th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
17
carlinthemarlin says:
Hulk’s going to get real pissed when the corn-lobby-influenced permeation of corn related substances in our food jacks up the price of everything in about two months here after the Iowa flooding. Here’s to paying [insert locally relevant inconveniently high price here] for beef come football season. Needless to say, free taquitos will be out of the question.
June 17th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
18
Signal to Noise says:
Headline: “Hulk running on platform of change, against Washington insiders.”
Top campaign officials are concerned about a trend of voters noting at the exit polls that skin tone does play a part in their voting decisions,and those voters are largely going to Hulk’s opponent, Tony Stark. Stark’s campaign plans to use this as a case why he should be the Marvel Party’s nominee against Batman, who has already sewn up the DC Party’s nod.
June 17th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
19
UgasTexan says:
Sorry, can’t post now… I’ve got to get to Sam’s to load up on beef.
June 17th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
20
DevilGrad says:
“HULK HATE POMPOUS ASSBAG YALIES.”
Devil join Hulk in hatred. Devil completely understand this.
June 17th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
21
Studley says:
DC Trojan @ 2 – The depth of Lauren’s canyon may be too much even for the Hulk. The Ron Jeremy Test should be applied for proper reference (since it is understood that if Ron can tap it easily, anyone can).
+11 to you, sir, for the arroyo reference.
June 17th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
22
rudy (not the guy from notre dame) says:
the flying dollar bills really made that animation.
June 18th, 2008 at 12:37 am