CORRECTIONS, 6/13/2008
Monday’s feature “At Home With The Big 10″, profiling Iowa Hawkeyes coach Kirk Ferentz, listed “sensitivity” and “soft hands” among his most commonly recognized qualities. Our editorial staff has since been contacted by Ferentz’s wife, Mary, who reports that he is a cold and unfeeling lover. We regret the error.
A late-night breaking news bulletin quoting Alabama Crimson Tide coach Nick Saban as saying he had “no surprises” for his “extra” scholarship players was incomplete. The blurb failed to include Saban miming the twirling of a mustache he does not possess, and should have been accompanied by the following photo of a little-used Tuscaloosa practice field:

We regret the error.
Tuesday’s interview with Arkansas quarterback Ryan Mallett stated incorrectly that his future aspirations include “becoming the Ozarks’ answer to Sutton Foster” and playing the title role originated by Foster in a national tour of Thoroughly Modern Millie. Mallett’s ambition is, in fact, to own his own business, and the fetching bob haircut he has sported in recent weeks appears to be a mere coincidence. We regret the error.
This morning’s scores and highlights roundup report that Mike Stoops blew a 24-point lead at home to Boston last night was factually inaccurate. Although the extent of his culpability for last night’s humiliation is unclear, it is generally accepted that Mike Stoops loses football games, not basketball games. We regret the error.
Wednesday’s Fulmer Cupdate on Virginia cornerback Mike Brown contained several inaccuracies. Brown was previously reported to have been charged with DWI and refusing to take a blood/breath test, and our latest sources gave an account that the altercation began much earlier in the evening at a Charlottesville lounge, where Brown jumped over the bar and began pummeling a bartender after being served a Manhattan instead of the appletini he had ordered. More credible sources now report that Brown did, in fact, receive his appletini, but that his outburst arose when he discovered the rim of the glass had been coated in pink sugar, not green as he had requested. We regret the error.
Thursday’s recap of the annual ACC Coaches Pageant stated that Duke’s David Cutcliffe took home the coveted Atlantic Tiara Trophy awarded to the winner of the talent competition. In fact, Coach Cutcliffe won Most Congenial. Miami’s Randy Shannon was the winner of the talent competition in a clean sweep of all judges following his fire baton routine. We regret the error.










1
NCT says:
Too few people toss out “fetching” these days, and that saddens me.
June 13th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
2
Oops Pow Surprise says:
Our editorial staff has since been contacted by Ferentz’s wife, Mary, who reports that he is a cold and unfeeling lover.
Says she.
June 13th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
3
Mr Alabama says:
That pit is where Dreamland Bar-b-q got started….
Basically some linemen were put there as punishment, and to survive, they started cooking the other players, mainly discipline problems and walk ons, who fell in, since its located in an “undisclosed” location…..and I am quite sure they havent changed their recipe…not gonna go there with the light meat/dark meat jokes…
June 13th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
4
Freak Power in '08 says:
Obviously the first Mike Brown story was wrong–there’s no way anyone gets served a Manhattan in Charlottesville by accident, because few people there know how to make them at all. Appletinis, though? No one would ever fuck one of those up.
WAHOOWA, motherfuckers!
June 13th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
5
CincySooner says:
YOOOOOOUUUU!! Crank dat Hurricane! YOOOOOOUUUU!!!
June 13th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
6
The underrated Sorola Palmer says:
Kudos on the Randy Shannon photoshop picture.
However, I think you put too many people in the OB for a U home game.
June 13th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
7
Year2-Dave says:
I sweat I saw Mike Stoops sitting behind the Laker bench. I think he got his ticket through Brennan Carroll as a thank-you gift for the three fumbles in last year’s game.
As an aside, kudos to Holly for following proper netiquette and not hotlinking pictures from other websites. Bandwidth stealing is not a crime, but it’s not cool either.
June 13th, 2008 at 1:37 pm
8
beckett says:
Corrections have quickly become my favourite part of EDSBS…
June 13th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
9
Joshua says:
Cincy beat me to it.
I like the flaming baton ’shop. But how you can look at that pic and the firstest and bestest thing coming to mind not be Soulja Boy is surprising.
June 13th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
10
Holly says:
@Joshua–I’m operating under the assumption that was the music for his routine.
June 13th, 2008 at 2:04 pm
11
The Great Barstoolio says:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHA!
Holly, you delightful hussy.
June 13th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
12
plastic paddy says:
Thoroughly Modern Millie = the WORST night of my life, I admit I am a sick man and will do anything to get laid, even go to the theater.
Please feel free to think I am gay, I would do the same to you if you admitted you had been to a play like some yankee girly man.
June 13th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
13
Bamaleg says:
One must be careful of what one wishes for. In days gone by, we fretted over a minimum of mention and discerned such slights were indicative of a grand plan gone awry. Now, the commentary comes on a daily basis and one is hard pressed to constantly offer thoroughly considered replies. Respect anew is directed to those who labor to create the content and thanks abound for inclusions, both great and small.
And the little used practice facility – technically, it’s in Northport.
June 13th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
14
NCT says:
Going to a play doesn’t make you gay. Going to Thoroughly Modern Millie, specifically? Yeah, that just might do it.
June 13th, 2008 at 3:24 pm
15
Mr Pelican Pants says:
Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu……………………….
June 13th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
16
hunglikehussain says:
@12
Plastic, I once fell asleep during “Cats”. Wife was enthralled.
However, I saw “Parsifal” in Bayreuth and was blown away. Never mind that I was sitting on a bench ala “Sanford stadium”, this opera was amazing. Almost as good as some Pink Floyd concerts in the 70’s.
June 13th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
17
marcillac says:
I got nothin’.
Multi Brava La Holly!!!!
June 14th, 2008 at 8:56 am
18
marcillac says:
hunglikehussein@14
You’re a pussy. I STOOD through Parsifal in Vienna – with Dame Gwyneth Jones singing Kundry at somewhat less than her best at the end of her career. This was after waiting in line for 3 hours for the standing room tickets. And I ddin’t even end up marrying the gril.
Bayreuth is quite the sauna though and adjusted for temperature quite a bit more uncomfortable than the benches at Stanford in late November (which I had the opportunity to…um…enjoy during my days at Cal).
(FWIW we’re in Vienna just now to see a couple of operas but my standing room days are gone – though with the current value of the $ they could be coming back in short order)
June 14th, 2008 at 9:06 am
19
TAFKAtOSUB says:
Let me make sure I have something right.
Since the crowning of the mythical recruiting national champion, Alabama has lost a 4* WR in Melvin Ray and Ohio State has gained the #1 recruit in the ENTIRE COUNTRY…yet Alabama fans are still beating their chest about Saban’s recruiting class and claiming it is still the #1 class in the country.
What is it with Alabama fans and things of a mythical nature…is that all you ever have to claim?
June 14th, 2008 at 9:18 am
20
CapstoneGrad06 says:
# 19
Not that it matters, because recruiting never does for two to three years, but based on Rivals.com’s formula, they only count the top twenty rated players on any team’s board. Losing Melvin Ray and Destin Hood still leaves Alabama with twenty guys that are ranked among the top three hundred players coming out of high school. While Ohio State will rise in the rankings, Alabama should not fall from their top spot, mythical as it is, based on the formula.
June 14th, 2008 at 1:11 pm
21
war eagle says:
LOL @ TAFKAtOSUB.
You sir, have joined the Alabama-led delusion of bragging about recruiting when your team’s on-field performance leaves you unfulfilled.
You should be better than that, however. OSU may lose a third MNC to an ESSS EEEE SEEEEE school (in a row!) this year, but at least you still win your conference and go to a relevant bowl game.
June 15th, 2008 at 9:41 am