CORRECTIONS: 6/6/2008
by Holly Anderson on Jun 6, 2008 2:07 PM EDT
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PrintMonday's lead story reported that Florida quarterback Tim Tebow was instrumental in the weekend capture of terror mastermind Osama bin Laden. A US government spokeswoman informed us late last night that while Mr. Tebow has been an active participant in the manhunt, he has aligned himself with numerous federal agencies in a strictly advisory capacity. As of this posting, bin Laden remains at large. We regret the error.
Tuesday's post "SEXXAY TENDENCIES" included the phone number for the University of South Carolina, which was listed as "800-588-2300." This was accompanied by a chorus singing the phrase "EMPIIIIIIIIIIIIRE!" This is, in fact, the number for Empire Carpets, and not the South Carolina Gamecocks athletic department, who may be reached at 1-800-WIN-COCKS.
Get out of my head, earworm from hell!
Thursday's Curious Index was published with an inaccurate photo caption. This man is not former Texas A&M coach Dennis Franchione:
We regret the error.
On Wednesday, we repeated an error from the British paper The Guardian when we suggested, in our piece Notable Headbuttings in College Football History, that Gore Vidal had headbutted Norman Mailer, and not the other way around. We regret the error, but stand by our standing list of college football's most important headbuttings, including Holly Rowe on Ron Franklin (2004), Knute Rockne on Sister Mary Catherine Sanford (1930), and [NAME REDACTED] on no fewer than 32 snack and beverage machines in Ben Hill Griffin Stadium (2002-2004).
This week's edition of Fulmer Cupdate reported that Colorado River toads, which contain known psychoactive substances. We regret the error.
Tuesday's "Whe[REDACTED] Are They Now?" feature stated that Illinois coach Ron Zook will be basing all decisions regarding next year's main receiving target for Juice Williams on conversations with returning players' spirit guides. This was based on inaccurate sourcing. Although Coach Zook has had what he characterizes as "productive, positive discussions" with the animal projections, particularly with that of Arrelious Benn (a curious otter), he will not be making final slot adjustments until the Offense Vs. Defense Fire Walk in mid-August. We regret the error.
In this Friday's Corrections, we listed the number for the South Carolina athletic department as 1-800-WIN-COCKS. This has turned out to be an entirely different type of business and, for the family readers of this blog, an inappropriate one. We regret the error.
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I love me a good headbuttin’, that’s for sure.
by RaginCajunRebel on Jun 6, 2008 2:11 PM EDT reply actions
aye – any good listin of headbutting and such that does not include Erk Russell is a sad and limp little list
by Pirate Petey on Jun 6, 2008 2:20 PM EDT reply actions
I knew better than to call 800-WIN-COCK
SC is actually 866-WIN-COCK
by Jerkwheat on Jun 6, 2008 2:23 PM EDT reply actions
‘’Looky, looky, looky. Here comes Cooky. Cooks Pest Control.’’
Now if we could just get Coach F to dress up like John Wayne Gacy and murder those darshes from the freecreditreport dot com commercial we’d be set.
by EmotionalFescue on Jun 6, 2008 2:31 PM EDT reply actions
Just don’t dial any 900 numbers that end in COCK.
Trust me.
Emmmpiiireee!
by GamecockTony on Jun 6, 2008 2:33 PM EDT reply actions
The director of 1-800-Go-Cock is a Korean gentleman who is actually a USC bidness grad. A Mr. Hee So Hung.
by NRBQ on Jun 6, 2008 2:34 PM EDT reply actions
Not exactly related, but can we get a post/picture of Ned landing on Omaha Beach in honor of today, the 64th anniversary of the turning point-battle in WWII? I saw the “original” photo earlier and wondered where the hell Ned was. It wasn’t right.
by Aerobab on Jun 6, 2008 2:35 PM EDT reply actions
Nice correction to a correction. But damn your clown pictures!
by Brian O'Blivion on Jun 6, 2008 2:50 PM EDT reply actions
That old car might be worth money! Call Victory Auto Wreckers at 860-2000. Victory tows seven days a week, and you might get cash on the spot! Or save money by fixing up your car with used parts! Victory Auto Wreckers, 710 East Green in Bensenville, near O’Hare!
/shits pants
by El Hombre on Jun 6, 2008 2:55 PM EDT reply actions
pretty sure you’re going to have to correct the Franchione correction. look harder it’s him
by ThreenOut on Jun 6, 2008 3:08 PM EDT reply actions
zook rarely deals in the occult, he is a tried and true believer in PsuedoSciences, like Phrenology, Alchemy, and of course the glorious Kinoki Footpads for the offensive linemen.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exmEGrNqgcA
by Illini FTW on Jun 6, 2008 5:23 PM EDT reply actions
- Did you see the comment left after the article?
…Three cheers for WVU. So often our sports heros think they have a free pass. This starts in high school and is continued in college. It is time everyone has to follow the rules. This hard love will certainly make better men and women. Thanks WVU sports program…
A big ol’ thanks to WVU.
by blon57 on Jun 6, 2008 5:35 PM EDT reply actions
I concur with #12. I saw coach fran in the parking lot of the Capstone Sheraton when he first moved to Tuscaloosa. I initially thought the circus was in town (and upon further reflection, perhaps it was), but was later told by the night desk clerk that the colorful gentleman in the lobby was actually the new footamaball coach. Thus, your only error with regard to the subject photograph is that you thought you made an error when, in actuality, you didn’t.
by Bamaleg on Jun 6, 2008 5:57 PM EDT reply actions
Although Coach Zook has had what he characterizes as “productive, positive discussions” with the animal projections, particularly with that of Arrelious Benn (a curious otter) . . . .
Does this mean that Benn has a shot with Emma Watson?
by DevilGrad on Jun 6, 2008 5:58 PM EDT reply actions
You should just be happy that you didn’t grow up in the Chicagoland area. The Empire jingle haunts my childhood. I’m pretty sure the same Empire song has been around since the 70’s. That little Animatronic carpet guy was actually a real human and he looks exactly like that thing.
by Zook Line and Sinker on Jun 6, 2008 6:01 PM EDT reply actions
Where’s the bunda dude? Two Fridays in a row….really?
Is this your subtle way of coming out?
by The Stos on Jun 6, 2008 6:06 PM EDT reply actions
DevilGrad @ 20 – He’d have to fight his way through a legion of wand-waving (so to speak) fanboys, I suspect.
by DC Trojan on Jun 6, 2008 6:09 PM EDT reply actions
@The Stos
Friday cheesecake was officially killed off last week. See the comments on the Corrections post for details, but basically it was a chore for Orson and Holly to do every week.
by Year2-Dave on Jun 6, 2008 6:19 PM EDT reply actions
No wonder I can’t get any USChikin tix. I had been callin 1-800-LOSE2CU and always talked with George Bennett, who explained his supply was limited.
by yoyofutbawl on Jun 6, 2008 11:54 PM EDT reply actions
Now, to be fair, a lobotomized beaver with a little tenacity could get through WVU’s MBA program, so surely the governor’s daughter could have “earned” it eventually anyway. This just kept a sex scandal from brewing around a tenured professor who enjoys the more sophisticated carnal pleasures.
by GTSteve on Jun 7, 2008 1:34 AM EDT reply actions
- - Limited Supply?
Um, do what now?
Seeing as how we have owned South Carolina football since, well since the inception of football…
and seeing as we are, count them, dare I say, count them 10-2 in our last 12 interactions with our inferior fellow state school…
the word is, “infinite,” not limited.
George Bennett, on the other hand, well it is what it is…
by Coop on Jun 7, 2008 2:46 AM EDT reply actions
Coop-
All tongue in cheek, life is boring w/out the Chix (& webbles to pick on). In my first job out of collitch, George was the Exxon rep who handled the account. Saw him at the SC Athletic HOF awards 2-3 weeks ago, which was the first time in about 30 years.
by yoyofutbawl on Jun 7, 2008 8:49 AM EDT reply actions
Has Steeletide come for everyone yet? I just picked up the mag at Barnes + Noble in East Lansing.
by Ground0EastLansing on Jun 7, 2008 6:08 PM EDT reply actions
Finally tracked down a copy last night after a week of hunting.
(Did I sleep with it under my pillow? DON’T YOU JUDGE ME, INNERNETS.)
by Holly on Jun 8, 2008 11:55 AM EDT reply actions
Don’t forget that Ryan Perrilloux is still out there hunting for Mr. bin Laden, opting for a lower profile in Rural Alabama. Together with the Baby Rhino, they are the “I Spy” guys, the Robinson and Scott of this generation.
by Studley on Jun 9, 2008 5:28 AM EDT reply actions
Thanks for the correction of the correction. It’s about time! Now do it again! Every time!
by ChemE93 on Jun 9, 2008 9:57 AM EDT reply actions
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