EDSBS LIVE: THE NARRATIVE EDITION
EDSBS Live returns! Listen here as we decide what the narrative will be for this year, summed up nicely in our patented (not quite) four questions below.
1. What is the best stolen storyline for your team this year? For Florida, this would be the exact storyline of the first 45 minutes of Blow: new comers improve our coverage, apply pressure to the opposition, and then make magic happen resulting in gold-lame speedo victory and beachside mansions in Mexico.

Just like that, but with Tim Tebow instead of Pervy McFondles there.
2. What is the worst stolen storyline for your team this year? The remainder of Blow. Newcomers, after initial success, spiral out of control on their own cockiness and end up in football lockdown.
3. If you could wish one storyline on another team……it would be Texas Tech reading the script of Yellowbeard all season long, with the Red Raiders taking us all on a half-cuddle, half-rape on the way to a national championship. Mike Leach with burning hair twists would be boss, too.
4. The plotline of your life was stolen from……a Wes Anderson movie. There’s strange doctors, a rapidly changing array of vocations, an odd lack of demonstrated emotion between family members, a decent but too coy soundtrack, and garbageloads of unnecessary allusions.
Talk to you tonight through a cold medicine-induced haze. (Seriously: tonight we really will be on that purple drank, but strictly for medicinal purposes.)












19
move=movie.
Comment by Pants McPants — June 4, 2008 @ 8:53 am
18
1) Dazed and Confused- the character of Pink. School stud who has Joey Lauren Adams in his back pocket but still has to smooch a brunette on the side.
2) Dazed and Confused- character of O’Bannion. Bully who won’t go away, who paddles the Big Ten unmercifully only to have paint poured on him by the SEC in a bowl game. We will still “kick your fucking ass right here” though. Dammit,
3) Dazed and Confused- I wish the character of Joey Lauren Adams on Oregon’s cheerleaders. Get them some cutoff jeans shorts and helium voices, stat!
4) Dazed and Confused- character of Mitch- skinny geek who hangs out with the cool kids and dates older women. Only I had weed.
Come to think of it, there’s just a myriad of possibilites for this move, Wooderson, Slater, Adam Goldberg….
Comment by Pants McPants — June 4, 2008 @ 8:52 am
17
#13- Wake Forest = Ewoks………..100+ cocktails
It has everything. They’re small, cute, cuddly and if you aren’t careful they’ll crush your superior firepower.
Comment by macker — June 4, 2008 @ 7:57 am
16
1. Batman Begins - a hero takes it’s licks, then comes back and kicks some serious ass in a hurricane of awesome.
2. DareDevil - should have been awesome, but somehow, . . . it just imploded in an awful, predictable way (USF = Rutgers, DareDevil = Ben Affleck)
3. Mission to Mars - WVU gets billed as pure awesome and starts good but turns out to be totally mundane and uninteresting and anti-climactic.
4. Confidence - It may seem like life has gone to total shit, but in actuality, I’ve actually got that shit under control and running according to plan. Even if that plan is totally on the fly.
Comment by That 5.0 Guy — June 3, 2008 @ 10:12 pm
15
What gave you that impression?
Comment by Holly — June 3, 2008 @ 8:12 pm
14
Orson, are you doing EDSBS Live tonight?
Comment by Zone Left — June 3, 2008 @ 7:29 pm
13
1. Take your pick… a) Return of the Jedi where a bunch of young fighters (Florida) defeat once and for all a crumbling empire of evil (FSU… and Wake Forest can be the Ewoks) or the end of Ghostbusters where a group of heroes (Florida again) blow up a giant man made of marshmallow (Phil Fulmer).
2. In keeping with the theme, Empire Strikes Back where a rejuvenated evil empire (FSU) takes its revenge on the young fighters (Florida) and put the dashing, manly hero (Tebow) out of commission in a block of carbonite.
3. For UCF, my mother’s school and my non-BCS rooting interest, Major League: despite incompetent management, the team attains glory by making the BCS.
4. A Beautiful Mind, minus the imaginary people and groundbreaking new theory in economics. I use spreadsheets to do college football stat analysis in my spare time… for fun… *hangs head*
Comment by Year2-Dave — June 3, 2008 @ 7:19 pm
12
1. Revenge of the Sith: Emperor Weis and his prodigy Darth Jimmy exert their will upon the football galaxy with some losses and tragedy but ultimately the solidification of the empire.
2. Requiem for a Dream: an endlessly downward spiral of failure culmiating in the double ass pounding by USC.
3. Godfather II: Playing the part of Fredo, as always, is Boston College.
4. ,Crossing the Bridge: good natured guy with best intentions misses out on some opportunities due to lack of balls but saves his ass and that of his friends by making wise choices in the end. But with a much better soundtrack.
Comment by AllWhoYonder — June 3, 2008 @ 5:28 pm
11
1. Best storyline (Florida) - Tebow’s the Man of the Year.
2. Worst storyline - Something like this after watching the secondary for another year.
3. Storyline for another team. Florida State in Requiem for a Dream.
4. Plotline for my life - Point Break - got into way too much trouble, all for a woman, and she wasn’t worth it. And I shoulda been an EFFF BEEEE EYE agent, but I got high.
Comment by Brian O'Blivion — June 3, 2008 @ 5:21 pm