FRIDAY CHEESECAKE: CHEESECAKE EDITION

by Orson on May 23, 2008 3:22 PM EDT

You might not want to check this at work, or at home, or at any place in the known universe. Why? Because human skin begins to burn at 140 degrees fahrenheit and ignites somewhere around 1600 degrees, and this collection of cheesecake photos far, far exceeds the capacity of mortal men to handle them properly. In fact, we don't even know what they look like because we've only heard the lore of their hotness secondhand; we fear their heat, an intense warmth we feel typing this from seven computers removed from the xenon-cooled hard drive where the files sit.

You are warned and aware of the dangers. Proceed only under the understanding that you act of your own volition and understand that EDSBS bears no liability in the matter.

With that, proceed. Good luck, soldier.

Marisa Miller Cheesecake. Visible femoral arteries roaaaarrrrgggh.

Been working on her squats and hamstring curls cheesecake. YEAH! LIMES!

RUB THAT SAUCE INTO THE STAGE BABY! THEN THE RABBIT IN A HAT TRICK! WOOOOOO!

Higher, baby! Higher!

Dim the lights, baby. Hot tub cheesecake not safe in soaks longer than six minutes at level 8.

Wedgie cheesecake really isn't taking this off, but rather tugging for the camera.

Guys in track pants make my cheesecake warm!

Tasetful IKEA-clad bedspread lounging cheesecake.

WHEW! We need a cigarette and some Gatorade after that!

Enjoy your Memorial Day weekend from the entire EDSBS staff.

Tweet Comment 35 comments | 0 recs |

Do you like this story?

Comments

wtf??

by brian on May 23, 2008 3:27 PM EDT reply actions

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…………….

by NRBQ on May 23, 2008 3:28 PM EDT reply actions

The cheesecake is a lie?

by Klak on May 23, 2008 3:28 PM EDT reply actions

Sometimes you get what you ask for. And it turns out that you did not want it in the first place.

DO NOT WANT!

by BamaTaxMan on May 23, 2008 3:30 PM EDT reply actions

i think lime cheesecake is now my favorite cheesecake

by formerlyanonymous on May 23, 2008 3:33 PM EDT reply actions

Somehow that’s kinda how I would’ve imagined Sara Lee in the buff.

by MorningBeer on May 23, 2008 3:33 PM EDT reply actions

I ate the whole thing and I’m still not full. Damn, low cal stuff.

by MassDad on May 23, 2008 3:36 PM EDT reply actions

MMMMMMMMMmmmmmmm…………………..

3,7-dihydro-3,7-dimethyl-1H-purine-2,6-dione

by NewAZTiger on May 23, 2008 3:45 PM EDT reply actions

ok then, can we get some bunda?

by dawgaddict on May 23, 2008 3:58 PM EDT reply actions

i hate you so much right now.

by scythia on May 23, 2008 4:02 PM EDT reply actions

Follow up to BamaTaxMan’s #4 – “be careful what you wish for… and be VERY specific!”

by Andy on May 23, 2008 4:04 PM EDT reply actions

Ok, how about just some plain ol Sorta safe for work, somewhat revealing cleavage, like in the old days, but not on old chicks from ’63?

by Mr. Pelican Pants on May 23, 2008 4:08 PM EDT reply actions

Happiness in not getting what you want, it’s wanting what you get.

by Bamaleg on May 23, 2008 4:12 PM EDT reply actions

I actually found this just as entertaining as the normal cheesecake because of the comedic value.

No, I’m not gay. Shut up.

by Mätt on May 23, 2008 4:18 PM EDT reply actions

That guy in the blue sweat pants must be really hungry because it looks like he might be starting to sport wood. . . not that I was look at his crotch or anything. What with a nice looking piece a pie there and all.

by Plucky Purcell on May 23, 2008 4:18 PM EDT reply actions

Perfect.

by oc phil on May 23, 2008 4:20 PM EDT reply actions

this makes me enjoy marissa miller more…funbags = tastycakes

by swampchomp on May 23, 2008 4:22 PM EDT reply actions

Nobody likes a smartass.

by Vol on May 23, 2008 4:24 PM EDT reply actions

Does LSU Freek have a hand in this? If so, all compliments are taken back…

by Last Dragon on May 23, 2008 4:36 PM EDT reply actions

Shouldn’t the guy in the track suit be seeing a cherry cheesecake?

by ChemE93 on May 23, 2008 4:53 PM EDT reply actions

I don’t think she is really a cheerleader.

by Picture Me Rollin on May 23, 2008 5:27 PM EDT reply actions

Picture Me Rollin @ 20 – I don’t know, she might be a real cheerleader, based on her pudendal confidence.

Or should that be her puddin-al confidence?

by DC Trojan on May 23, 2008 5:36 PM EDT reply actions

As good sirs #4 and #10 have pointed out, this is basically the same plot as that movie “bewitched” no? Be careful what you wish for? At least there was no Brendan Fraser appearance here.

by Chips O'Toole on May 23, 2008 5:37 PM EDT reply actions

I got quite jealous of my 17 year old cousin when up on his facebook popped a picture of him with marissa miller. Still no idea how he ended up in the same room as her, just some random day.

by Brian on May 23, 2008 5:47 PM EDT reply actions