ONLY BREAKS DOWN IN PRESENCE OF AUBURN KICKER

by Orson on May 21, 2008 3:12 PM EDT

RCR sent us these this morning, and we vow to have a duplicate no matter how many alligators we have to boom stick in the dead of night in forgotten bayou somewhere in Central Florida. As the headline suggests, it really only has trouble if you're wearing a kicker's cleat and Auburn jersey, in which case you will hear engine sputtering, disturbing rattling noises, and then run out of gas just shy of the gas station.

Dig the recessed headlight. (HT: RCR.)

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McFadden-esque in both style and quality.

by suicidewatch on May 21, 2008 3:14 PM EDT reply actions

2 HTs in one day. Shit…if only I could be this productive with my job.

by RaginCajunRebel on May 21, 2008 3:16 PM EDT reply actions

oh…and war eagle.

by suicidewatch on May 21, 2008 3:18 PM EDT reply actions

We’re really glad they didn’t choose to do this with a Bulldog or a Tiger. Though if you do see a Tiger, be sure to follow it: there’s an exotic pets trafficking ring at the end of wherever it goes.

by Orson Swindle on May 21, 2008 3:19 PM EDT reply actions

Georgia rides bitch.

by Allahver Fist on May 21, 2008 3:24 PM EDT reply actions

I guess I’ll go ahead and get the obvoius joke out of the way then:

Mike Vick loves his Georgia themed bike.

by RaginCajunRebel on May 21, 2008 3:24 PM EDT reply actions

How fast was that gator going when he swallowed that bike?

by Crabapple Buck on May 21, 2008 3:25 PM EDT reply actions

if Tebow rides out onto the field on this thing to start the season for the Gators with his Heisman in hand, i might just root for Florida…just out of pure respect for something so awesome and ridiculous.

by suicidewatch on May 21, 2008 3:27 PM EDT reply actions

nice

by CincySooner on May 21, 2008 3:44 PM EDT reply actions

So does the fish sing when you walk in front of it?

by crane on May 21, 2008 4:07 PM EDT reply actions

- Agree all around. And we don’t play them this season (until the SECCG bitches!)

by WarCardinals on May 21, 2008 4:08 PM EDT reply actions

This should be filed under- items only men can appreciate.

And people ask me why I’m not married…

by blon57 on May 21, 2008 4:26 PM EDT reply actions

Let’s see the Notre Dame version!

by Jester on May 21, 2008 4:43 PM EDT reply actions

Jester, they don’t have one…they just use the Pope-mobile

by Ryno on May 21, 2008 4:46 PM EDT reply actions

Knowshon and Rennie Curran look forward to kicking that gaytor’s ass……again.

by Dawg Pound on May 21, 2008 4:47 PM EDT reply actions

#8:
And in the other hand the freshly circumsized foreskin of a third-world child, held just as triumphantly as the Heisman.

by Teddy Dupay on May 21, 2008 4:50 PM EDT reply actions

“Knowshon and Rennie Curran look forward to kicking that gaytors assagain.”

OMG THAT IS SO FUNNY:GAY!!!!! ARP! ARP!

by Orson Swindle on May 21, 2008 4:57 PM EDT reply actions

@16 Teddy

Dr. Tebow used said foreskins later on during his missionary trip. Seems there was some other kids in the area who because of a genetic defect, they were born without eyelids.

Using the foreskins to make eyelids, Dr. Tebow again showed his humanitarian side.

The kids are great now, just a little “cockeyed.”

by hunglikehussain on May 21, 2008 5:01 PM EDT reply actions

Think how much cooler it would look with a little pair of jorts on the gator.

by Vol on May 21, 2008 5:02 PM EDT reply actions

The eyelids also swell when you rub them. Touchy problem there.

by Orson Swindle on May 21, 2008 5:02 PM EDT reply actions

Orson, the gator in question likes having a motorcycle shoved up its ass… we have to at least assume it’s possible he’s gay… not that there’s anything wrong with that.

by PeterPumpkinhead on May 21, 2008 5:03 PM EDT reply actions

How many circumcisions to the gallon?

by Kilgore Trout on May 21, 2008 5:04 PM EDT reply actions

@ Orson:

Could be worse. He could have tried to work in "jorts’ somehow. It’s almost as if they WANT to be stereotyped as homogenous mooncalves.

by Not You on May 21, 2008 5:04 PM EDT reply actions

We would all put aside our differences and root for Florida for at least a day or so. Though the number of hot, long showers taken the day after to wash away the sins of that Saturday would only exacerbate that drought you guys have got down thar.

Shit, we need to get a petition (or a variant of a petition that has both meaning and weight – which I don’t believe exists) to get this Gatorcycle shindig going. ’Twould be fucking awesome.

by poguemahone on May 21, 2008 5:06 PM EDT reply actions

“Mooncalves”

Oh, ONE HUNDRED COCKTAILS to you for using Pliny the Elder.

by Orson Swindle on May 21, 2008 5:07 PM EDT reply actions

Hmmmm…I always wondered how Orson’s “law of natural selection” worked.

by hunglikehussain on May 21, 2008 5:08 PM EDT reply actions

Don’t pretend otherwise, you would snicker if the owner wore jorts when he drove it.

by Dawg 05 on May 21, 2008 5:13 PM EDT reply actions

“This Motorcycle’s Protected By Smith & Wesson And The Fish & Wildlife Commission”

by Bagger Douche on May 21, 2008 5:17 PM EDT reply actions

@12: False. I’m a lady, and born anew in its genius!

by GatorAM on May 21, 2008 7:38 PM EDT reply actions

only in Florida

by DawgInFLa on May 21, 2008 10:45 PM EDT reply actions

Dawg Pound @ #15…just can’t resist your own version of homo-eroticism, can you? What or who did you run into in Gainesville? I’ll stick with my memories of coed dawgs and “…the girlshapedlovedrug…” I encountered repeatedly in Athens…

by sb on May 22, 2008 9:03 AM EDT reply actions