DELAYS. WE OFFER UP GOLD IN APOLOGY.

by Orson on May 14, 2008 10:24 AM EDT

Today is nine kinds of catastrophically overbooked: freelance pieces, two SN pieces, and a mounting sleep debt we're not entirely enjoying. (Less giddy sleepy, and more zombiedrooling stupor.)

We'll get the CI up ASAP, but in the meantime accept comic gold. Warning: the chorus of this song is:

Why you comin' home
at five in the morning?

Something's going wrong,
Let me smell yo dick.

You may recognize it from Lord Byron's epic poem Manfred. You may not. Either way, it's awesome.

Note: always wear rhumba panties and a corset to bleach your cheating man's clothes. (HT/Blame: OPS.)

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Was that written by Mrs. Mike Price?

by Crabapple Buck on May 14, 2008 10:29 AM EDT reply actions

Well, I think I’ve found my new ringtone.

by Mr. Wrong on May 14, 2008 10:34 AM EDT reply actions

“Lemme smell yo d*ck” – from the Tyrese classic, “Baby Boy”?

by Domer Guy on May 14, 2008 10:38 AM EDT reply actions

+100 cocktails to crabapple buck. so genius.

by Last Dragon on May 14, 2008 10:42 AM EDT reply actions

Is is me or have others noted a slight degradation in lyrics lately?

This is one of those tunes that is blaring from the “tump” beside you in traffic – you roll up the window hoping it will go away, only to notice your 14 year old daughter is singing along. Jesus!

by Sundawg on May 14, 2008 10:47 AM EDT reply actions

I thought that if you could get with a white girl, and you’re black, that its pretty much like a free pass? I guess that’s incorrect. Do white girl’s poons smell different? What’s going on with that?

by Brian on May 14, 2008 10:58 AM EDT reply actions

Her boyfriend has a fine rebuttal, though. GIve him credit.

by Darkknight on May 14, 2008 11:00 AM EDT reply actions

That won’t work, he gave the fuck lion a bird bath.

by Brian O'Blivion on May 14, 2008 11:09 AM EDT reply actions

What lyrics. I’m in the wrong business. This is the kinda shit we used to do as kids to get laughs and be crude. And this bitch will be on Cribs next month with an 8,000 sq foot LA villa with 3 Bentlys, a theatre room, a 14 foot wide Sub Zero fridge and Dick shaped pool. All for “Let me smell yo Dick”. God, if I knew then what I know now.

by shovel pass on May 14, 2008 11:18 AM EDT reply actions

I’m so happy that Smell Yo Dick has finally found its way here

by Jerkwheat on May 14, 2008 11:29 AM EDT reply actions

arrrrgh… me lassie said the same thin’ to me in the wee hours of last Saturday ….

why, I just slapped the wench in irons for a few hours to teach her good manners… then went straight away to give the little feller a good scrubbin’

no way Pirate Petey was going to be keelhauled for a bit of sloppy hygiene

by Pirate Petey on May 14, 2008 11:30 AM EDT reply actions

“smell yo’ dick”… effective and understandable, though I cannot believe I would ever be asked to allow my wife to whiff the wood…besides, I’m such a bad liar all she’d have to do is ask and I’d fuck up. Of course, since marriage my courting tackle has been in what she calls her “hope chest”. Shit.

by sb on May 14, 2008 11:59 AM EDT reply actions

I smell your dick! I SMELL IT UP!!!

by Grimey on May 14, 2008 12:31 PM EDT reply actions

I’m trying to think forward to a time, 40 years from now, when this is on the Golden Oldies channel.

But it just ain’t happening.

by Kenny on May 14, 2008 2:10 PM EDT reply actions

#13, Grimey

+100 Dicktails.

by Allahver Fist on May 14, 2008 2:36 PM EDT reply actions

Personally, I’d just call Joey Greco rather than inhale deeply of smegma-laden trouser eel.

by CockofAges on May 14, 2008 3:15 PM EDT reply actions

Umm, yea, that’s a great tune, with profound lyrics. I’m sure her mother is so proud.

by Stockman on May 14, 2008 4:33 PM EDT reply actions

Cockofages @ #16…“smegma-laden trouser eel”…you are worthy…

by sb on May 14, 2008 5:04 PM EDT reply actions

If she’s “smellin my dick” then doesn’t that mean that my Johnson is right by her mouth?

I have no problem with her request.

by JohnInHsv on May 14, 2008 8:32 PM EDT reply actions

And we wonder what is wrong with the black female community…..and while you’re down there investigatin’ , go ahead and “toss my salad”…and wash my “schweaty ballzack” ….sheesh…..I know one thing, you aint gonna ever have a male rap song requesting to “smell yo monkey”…..
I am sure they will let them keep that one to themselves…..
Husbands Attorney: " Ms. Jackson-Williams-Drew-Jones,
How did you find out your husband was having an affair?"

Ms….—“Yo’ honor, I smelleded his dick”

The defense rest your honor, no further questions……this proves this bitch is fuckin crazy..

by Mr. Pelican Pants on May 15, 2008 3:27 PM EDT reply actions