CURIOUS INDEX, 5/5/08
by Orson on May 5, 2008 9:02 AM EDT
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The Kentucky football programwill use its own plane for recruiting after Wildcat bigwigs approved the measure to help Kentucky keep up with other programs in both basketball and football handshakin' and promise makin'. Sure, they could go the reasonable route and lease their own private plane, a reasonable time-share in the sky with some other contractor...or they could nut up and do the SEC proud by going the Iron Man route, getting a fly-ass private jet complete with stunning waitresses, disco lights, and retractable stripper pole. You know it's only a matter of time before LSU does just that and puts a deep-fryer in the galley. Or you could just go Google-luxe. Hammocks in space, bitches!
Nick Saban was at Kent State when four Kent State students were shot by National Guardsmen in the worst recruiting campaign for the National Guard ever. Saban says it gave him "perspective," a quote which makes you wonder why more sportswriters don't commit death by wall/head collision in search of meaningful quotes for stories. In other news, our morning dose of Tussin made us feel "Tussin'd." Jabu Lovelace will freak you from the bench. The EDSBS Heisman Candidate '08 based on pimpish name alone, Jabu Lovelace, is the subject of another "hey, there's lots of confidence and stuff about everyone around here because we're all confident and stuff" offseason article. Rutgers should be confident: a name like Jabu Lovelace practically guarantees scoring both on and off the field. His full first name? Jabulani. That little rush of pleasure you just felt? Only a hint of the freaky pleasures that await you and your adventures in love with Jabu. Strengths: ability to read defenses, take hits from linebackers and buildings. Live to win! Dartmouth qb Conner Kempe can't make kiteboarding any less silly than you think it is...but he almost died trying: Kempe was kiteboarding off the coast of Miami when he caught an unusually strong updraft. While updrafts are what give kiteboarders speed and time during a run, this current carried Kempe 60 feet in the air and flew him 300 feet onto shore, smashing him into the side of a building, dragging him to the ground, and throwing him into cars, poles and fences. Kempe was read last rites at one point before his astounding recovery, and will start for Dartmouth this fall. GRRRRR BARWIS. The cult of Barwis expands ever further. No, your 30 minute session on the elliptical machine does not necessitate the consumption of chocolate milk because you did not just do five sets of hang cleans followed by a ten minute plyometric vomit-circuit. |
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If Kent State gave Saban “perspective”, then why did he compare a football game to 9/11 and Pearl Harbor? That would equate the Kent State incident to a wind sprint.
P.S. If I sacrificed a bucket of KFC to Jabu, would he help me hit a curveball?
by ChemE93 on May 5, 2008 9:11 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
trying to think of a name for your firstborn? that’s right… Jabu
gotta have it
by Futbawl Fan on May 5, 2008 9:11 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
“That little rush of pleasure you (I) just felt? Sorry, I think it was the Bang-Bang Shrimp I had last night at Bonefish…and less of a pleasure rush than the urgent prodding of the two-minute warning which provides notice of the imminent need to facilitate…I think I gotta take a Jabu…
by sb on May 5, 2008 9:23 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Kentucky’s not even gonna buy a plane? They’re just gonna rent one? Then they should prepare to continue to get smoked by Nick Saban, who just bought NASA’s surplus Tu-144LL because he is a RECRUITING INNOVATOR.
by Doug on May 5, 2008 9:30 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I always love the spring “we’re confident ready to go” i wanna hear a coach be honest and say… we’re probably going to suck this year. like bad.
by ThreenOut on May 5, 2008 9:31 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I guess claiming Casey Dick as a hardship didn’t work for Bobby and Co.
by ThreenOut on May 5, 2008 9:52 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I guess claiming Casey Dick as a hardship didn’t work for Bobby and Co.
by ThreenOut on May 5, 2008 9:53 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2008/football/ncaa/05/02/mallett.arkansas.ap/index.html
Arkie gets b-slapped
by ThreenOut on May 5, 2008 9:53 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
crap. it kept not showing up. sorry Orson.
by ThreenOut on May 5, 2008 9:54 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
I know I’ve seen many a landing strip in Alabama.
by Crabapple Buck on May 5, 2008 10:30 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Here is video of the kiteboarding accident:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gv96Zromg8Q
by Mr Pelican Pants on May 5, 2008 10:31 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
#1
Will you please stop with that shit? He did not compare the ULM game to 9/11…I know you have a little bit seep out thinking about Saban misspeaking behind the microphone..but if one took the time to look at the whole transcript…you would see that no comparison was made..
/rant
by CapstoneAlum on May 5, 2008 11:39 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
That is pretty much exactly why I never go kiteboarding. That and those blood-thirsty carp! Those sons-of-bitches will eat you alive!
by JB on May 5, 2008 11:44 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
So, Saban was at Kent st. I always wondered what in the hell those guys were shooting at, now I understand.
by shane on May 5, 2008 12:37 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Thanks, Mr. PP, for not Rick-rolling me again, which I fully expected.
by NRBQ on May 5, 2008 12:42 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Capstone Alum
“He was not equating losing football games to those catastrophic events,” football spokesman Jeff Purington said in a statement to The Associated Press. “The message was that true spirit and unity become evident in the most difficult of times. Those were two tremendous examples that everyone can identify with.”
Wasn’t he using the difficult times during 9/11 and pearl harbor as metaphors for “difficult times” of losing two consecutive football games??
by SEC fan in B10 country on May 5, 2008 1:04 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
#20
1) “This is our 9/11.”
2) “In difficult times people come together.”
Can you tell the difference? I certainly hope so.
by CapstoneAlum on May 5, 2008 1:44 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Capestone Alum, you are biased enough to tell the difference. But using the difficult times of 9/11 and Pearl Harbor as metaphors is what everyone has objection to.
If the shoe was on the other foot and it was Tommy Tubberville saying these same lines, you would have shouted foul till you had lost your voice. So don’t try to convince people otherwise.
by SEC fan in B10 country on May 5, 2008 2:02 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
#19
Although I was tempted, I refrained…..kinda like H.I. in Raising Arizona, when he admitted he found himself “driving by convience stores that werent on the way home”………
#1
I think Nick Saban wasn’t comparing it to 9/11, I think he was saying he was dialing 911 cause during the ULM debacle, I am pretty sure he told the dispatcher that if we lost, he would kill somebody
by Mr. Pelican Pants on May 5, 2008 2:05 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Re Saban/911.
Please stop beating the shit out of Eight Belles.
by Tater Salad on May 5, 2008 2:45 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
If they’re going to rent planes, they ought to do it from the man that sang “Shake it Like a White Girl:”
http://www.marquisjet.com/home.html
For those who don’t know:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4J-xFMO-vM
Yes, that man founded a multi-million dollar company. Where da white women at?
by MCab on May 5, 2008 2:46 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
JABU LOVELACE. The running man with the cannon arm who won’t get any serious time unless Mike Teel gets injured. And if he does, then expect the rate of rocket-hard passes to the Rutgers WRs to increase three-fold.
I’m…a little worried for 2010?
by John F. on May 5, 2008 9:41 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
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