CURIOUS INDEX, 4/29/08

Why is it that every time the tarnished dome of ND gets further corroded, my heart grows warmer?

And after losing 8 games, slick rick becomes “Coach Dorrell’s Successor”

Mario Kart Wii has been awesome so far, except for the suspiciously frequent occurrence of getting trucked by bullet or invincible computer cars every time I spin out on a banana peel on 150CC.

You heard that right; entire cars that are bullets. Eat that, GTA IV.

Notre Dame cracks me up. As if their slice of the BCS pie isn’t disproportionately large, they’ve got to milk everyone else’s gate for all they can?

Hey Domers, guess what? You’ll never get that deal with an SEC team. And when you walk blindly into another bowl game against one with your over-rated team, that SEC team will make another potato famine look like Mardi Gras. Or, perhaps, the rancid draft beer at the Linebacker Lounge (aptly matched by the bad draft beer at Athens, Georgia’s own Georgia Theater) seem like the elixir of the gods.

You will notice they haven’t called tOSU either and our AD is a Domer. I guess they want to avoid a slaughter at all costs. Syracuse is about their speed. Fuck those overly pious pricks.

I was the world’s biggest Taylor Bennett fan last summer. Early in the season, based on his performance, and first hand anecdotes of his shoddy attitude (RE: Drinking every day of the week before a road game and skipping class) were brought to light.

apparently sarah jessica parker wilson does pee sitting down?

what is unreported is that tony soprano and charlie weis wrestled for the right to a home and home and Weis lost. Soprano has his way w/ Mrs. Weis and smoked a cigar afterwards.

ND balked afterwards.

an ND/SEC six year deal would never happen because you couldn’t get an SEC team to go that far north three times.

Besides, ND can play “regional” games like Washington State in San Antonio instead!

New Jersey sucks all around, so why would ND want to play in the Meadowlands? They should have asked to play in Yankee stadium.

I wish the Big East would grow a set and tell Notre Dame once and for all that they are either all the way in or all the way out. No more of this “just the tip” stuff.

There’s something hilarious about a 3-9 team making those sorts of “proposals.” It’s kind of like a Beirut hostage demanding that the Hezbollah terrorist holding a gun to his head bring him hot towels and an extra pillow.

We brag to women that we can piss on a tree, then bitch at them when they pee in a bay? What kind of two-faced nonsense is this?

Seriously, though, raise your hand if you’ve never peed in a large body of water.

That’s what I thought.

the original mario kart still stands as one of the greatest video games ever made.

Erik – I never proudly pissed on camera with a smile on my face. Well except for that cameo in the final scene of Golden Rain Love IX.

Judging by the prevalence of STD’s in Louisiana and its informal title of “Highest Number of Loose Women per capita,” Mr. Bennett has just entered a sexual dimension of such trashiness that he’ll be bangin’ ho’s in his low rider while munching some Johnny’s Pizza and bustin’ a sag in his hammer looped Hilfigers.

1. - hear hear. Although obviously no-one told this young lady that when marking your territory in the great outdoors, squatting and pissing through cloth is not the way to go.

Set yourself free, Bama Urinatrix!

@ erik,

large body of water?? hell i’ll piss in the shower without batting an eye.

If there are any big hurricanes that brew in the Gulf this summer, I blame her. Those tropical waters just got a bit more tropical.

Hell, I pissed in a diaper for years, and I plan on doing so again when I retire.

She’s got a lanky Laura Dern-prolly freaky in the sack- thing going on. I like it.

Welcome to Perdido Ass.
Notice there is no “P” in it.
Please keep it that way.

@18 gerry dorsey

Pissing in the shower? I used to do it all the time until I got busted by the wife due to the previous evenings consumption of asparagus. She was pissed.

#16…Dont ever take Johnny’s Pizza’s name in vain again sir.

Well, it seems as though “old” Orson made it from Vegas to Orange Beech.

http://img230.imageshack.us/img230/9648/045bx8.jpg

#16:
Highest number of mentally unstable women per capita, methinks.

Correction….Beach as in seashore not the tree.

she’s so disappointed that Girls Gone Wild wasn’t there, she was just determined to get on the damn interweb somehow!
 
and i’m calling total bullshit if anyone on here tries to claim one or both of the following:

1) you have never pissed in a pool, ocean, lake, or shower.

2) you wouldn’t be standing there with a nice cool miller lite when she got back, just tryin’ like hell to hit that.

All southern belles know that if you have to piss at the beach, you wade out at least waist deep and just stand there rather than obviously popping a squat in ankle deep water. The former is a much klassier approach.

Seriously, someone had to have met this chick at Mullet Toss, does anyone know her name?

Fish fuck in the water and people are squeamish about a girl peeing in it? What, is pee some magic homeopathic substance that works best at a 1000000X dilution?

Here’s a nugget of joy for everyone— all that lovely pollen we’re breathing in right now is, basically, armored tree semen. Enjoy!

TCOAN @ #30…“armored tree semen”…nice; hadn’t thought of it quite that way…although those frickin’ trees ought to be a little more discriminating in where they choose to “spread their seed”…my sinuses don’t appreciate nor wish to participate in arborphilia.

TCOAN @ 30 – I’m saying if she’s going to be obvious about taking a pee in the ocean, she should own it.

As for armored tree semen, it’s less unappetizing than imagining the fine particles of fecal aerosol surrounding us all. Up the nose or not.

Also found in the Ocean….Ambergris or Sperm whale vomitus.

Used in perfumes, it is sold for approximately $15/gram. Sperm whale gastrointestinal expectorant to seduce a man……..Yeah, I can see that.

@32

DC Trojan, the olfactory physiology of humans and other mammals is fascinating. In a nutshell, actual molecules of any scent are deposited on nasal receptacles to be interpreted by the brain.

When you smell a fart, actual molecules from the intestine of the purveyor have migrated into your nose.

FWIW, the Orange did win the first game of that three-game series with ND back in 2003, and we were pretty bad then (though not as bad as we are now).

Also worth noting, the 2007 Orange, while being a supremely awful team that only managed to win two games, one against Buffalo, were quite capable of moving the ball on bad defenses. So don’t be too shocked if GRob beats ND as part of the 5-7/6-6 season he needs to save his job; Coach P did.

Damnit, after cussing Nintendo for the Gamecube for years (mostly for a lack of NCAA football), I have now determined that I must get a Wii.

How humble of Notre Dame to have visited Ronald Reagan in the Rose Garden at the White House on Jan. 18, 1989, resisting all temptation to call for a meeting at a neutral site more to its grandiose liking.

Comments like this almost compensate for the NYT’s employment of a Neo-Keynesian Op-ed Writer. Almost.