KENTUCKY IS SLOWER THAN YOU RECALL
Been to Kentucky? We have. The barbecue is underrated, the weather eats our ass, and combine Tennessee provincialism with Ohio squalor and your math for the place is complete. In other words, it’s so bad you’d rob a cop just to get a thrill.

This is actually from the Redneck Games in Georgia, and has no relation to this story. Carry on.
This is a worse idea than you might realize:
Murray State quarterback Jeff Ehrhardt was charged with pushing a campus police officer and taking his ticket book. The athletic director called this “a prank gone bad.”
Ehrhardt, a 20-year-old sophomore, was arrested Wednesday and charged with second-degree robbery. He surrendered to the campus public safety office and returned the ticket book after a witness identified him.
Your moment in insane judicial overkill is sponsored by: Kentucky, the Bluegrass State. Second-degree robbery for robbing a cop? What is this, Soviet Russia! We now instantly award ourselves points for doubling up on a conservative blogger’s version of Godwin’s Law (first to mention Soviet Russia in comparision wins!) and for opening up the logical “In Kentucky, you rob cop. IN SOVIET RUSSIA, COP ROBS YOU!”)
No Fulmer Cup points awarded due to Murray State not being a division one team. But it’s cute and sad nonetheless.









1
Stephen Colboar says:
I demand that the rules be changed to allow D1AA teams to garner points in the Fulmer Cup.
Murray State will be our Appalachian State.
April 15th, 2008 at 9:52 am
2
Diallo says:
What’s higher? That guy in the pic’s IQ or Mizzou’s Fulmer Cup points?
April 15th, 2008 at 10:15 am
3
sb says:
I second #1…some of the most creative and pointless efforts are initiated by our brethren in lower athletic divisions. We should applaud their ability to shout out and rise above the noise generated by D1, and credit them the accolades they so richly deserve…wow…I feel so, so altruistic. Never mind…fuck ‘em.
April 15th, 2008 at 10:16 am
4
hunglikehussain says:
#1
Get with the pogrom!
April 15th, 2008 at 10:36 am
5
mambajack says:
If you let the D1-AA (or whatever they’re s’posed to be called now) in, then you’ll have the DII apologists demanding to be included. It’ll end up going all the way down to the NAIA. Do they still have NAIA? Hell, it’ll probably have intramural guys included at some point. I have a dream. A dream where all crimes are equally considered for the Fulmer Cup. You are not judged by the level of your college. Or something like that.
April 15th, 2008 at 10:41 am
6
Dawg 05 says:
Is that guy levitating?
April 15th, 2008 at 10:46 am
7
Kenny says:
Dawg 05 @ 6: Yes, just like Richt a while back.
Remember how the voting folks let Appy State be considered after beating UM? They were 25th for a week.
So should these young Fulmer Cuppers, who are insuring that local prosecutors in out of the way places earn their keep.
April 15th, 2008 at 10:51 am
8
Ground0EastLansing says:
Well, Murray State could be like Appalachian State, except that that gesture would be, at most, a token one. Appalachian State was in the AP poll for all a few weeks until their loss to Wofford, and, generally speaking, it usually takes something spectacular for a 1-AA school to make the blotter. A 1-AA school will never win the Fulmer Cup, and in true 1-AA fashion, I feel a four-team playoff should be made, starting in August, of the most egrigious offenses in 1-AA to determine a LEGITIMATE champion.
Also, recognizing that other CFB divisions produce offenses that are just as outlandish and spectacular as DIvision 1, I propose that an Ellis T. Jones be made for divisions 1-AA under, in order to recognize their contributions. This would be called the Mitch Cozad award. Any objections?
April 15th, 2008 at 10:53 am
9
Dave says:
In Soviet Kentucky, bullshit thinks you’re Rich Brooks!
April 15th, 2008 at 10:53 am
10
jon says:
+100 Dave
Tennessee provinicialism and Rust Belt ennui. Sounds about right, except Louisville is a more interesting city than either The Cleve or Nashville.
April 15th, 2008 at 11:01 am
11
AlanInDC says:
As a Kentucky native, I feel I have to stand up for my state. We gave the world tobacco, horse racing, college basketball, and whiskey. Oh… and Ashly Judd. You’re welcome.
April 15th, 2008 at 11:05 am
12
Excuse me Stewardess, but I speak jive says:
In Soviet Capstone, This Shit doesn’t have time for Nick Saban
April 15th, 2008 at 11:05 am
13
Stephen Colboar says:
8, you’re proposal is quite the appropriate one.
April 15th, 2008 at 11:07 am
14
Brian says:
Don’t forget that mutton barbecue!!!
I went to a Kentucky sorority semiformal thing once, it was aight, nothin spectacular (trim wise). “Better than up north” is how id characterize it.
April 15th, 2008 at 11:46 am
15
August West says:
Arrested for robbing a cop?
Wut tha hell mahn… I thouht this wuz Ameruka!?
April 15th, 2008 at 12:49 pm
16
sb says:
#11, you only gave the world tobacco when you were a part of Virginia…since then, you, too, have grown it, but don’t go re-writin’ history an’ shit when VA and NC were the true culprits.
But credit where it’s due…the Kentucky Mint Julep is certainly better than the Virginia equivalent…I’ll take bourbon over brandy every time.
April 15th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
17
Excuse me Stewardess, but I speak jive says:
hell- i’ll take Ashley Judd over booze…
April 15th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
18
Excuse me Stewardess, but I speak jive says:
wait a minute- i’ve seen what Wynona looks like- maybe i’ll keep the sauce…
April 15th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
19
drewky says:
Hold on.
We supply the world with delicious oak-aged bourbon and are the US’s number one supplier of dank weed (inside the states) and we get this kinda treatment?
sheesh. thanks alot.
/murray state grad
April 15th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
20
Cookie Monster says:
Sounds like a member of devilgrad’s family.
April 15th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
21
Jody says:
#14
Obviously you’re a turd hanging out with the fat-girl greeks. Any fool with decent vision knows Kentucky girls take a backseat to noone. Try Keeneland one Saturday and you’ll see what I mean. Until then, say hello to the rest of the Cameron Crazies for me dork.
April 16th, 2008 at 3:55 pm