TUBERFIELD STRIKES!
From the Auburner comes a story of horror so overblown and provincial, it must be about the Auburn/Alabama rivalry. Overblown and provincial, however, is just our speed, so here you go:
The inclusion of the “Angels With Filthy Souls” line is a nice touch, as is the Golden Flake ad. Right now, Nick Saban is doing dips shirtless in a dark prison cell he calls home while watching this video to prepare for 2008.
Filed under: Alabama man! he can drink he can bowl he can drink some, Blog Buddies, Coaches, the BCS, scandals, arrests, and other eccentri, College football, Southeastern Conference by Orson Swindle
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1
Fear the Toe
Comment by citizencrane — March 28, 2008 @ 9:45 am
2
Come back when you got 9, the series record, more SEC championships that GA Tech, more than 1/2 a NC.
Yes, I am bitter. But I know this won’t last forever, just like I know that football didn’t begin 7 years ago.
Comment by Sad State of Affairs — March 28, 2008 @ 9:55 am
3
@ #2 –
Fear not, we Aubs know that it isn’t going to last forever …
But …
It’s been a hell of a run, don’t think its quite over yet, and having suffered through my pre-teen years in South AL in the 70s, am sure as hell gonna enjoy it while it lasts.
Comment by JeffAU — March 28, 2008 @ 10:10 am
4
@2, You’re right, it ended 7 years ago (for alabama).
Comment by Unhappy Monkey — March 28, 2008 @ 10:18 am
5
A “Click! Clack!” sound bite would have been icing on the cake as Tubby brought the team out.
Comment by J5 — March 28, 2008 @ 10:19 am
6
The curious chop block conspiracy kids may be interested to know this tidbit gleaned from gtsports.blogspot.com on Tech’s spring practice:
“By the way, the D-Line has to wear mandatory knee braces during spring. Why? Well, the O-Line is all about more cut-blocking. Legal blocking mind you, but blocking that is more prone to lead to injury. So need to protect those D-Linemen.”
Cut block: the gentleman’s chop block.
Comment by Brian — March 28, 2008 @ 10:23 am
7
only an aubie could come up with something so stupid
enjoy your glory days while they last
Comment by mr awesome — March 28, 2008 @ 10:39 am
8
Go Warhawks… Louisiana Monroe is some kinda football team.. I mean they lost to North Texas last year, but come on.. North Texas is a JUGGERNAUT!
Comment by ALGator — March 28, 2008 @ 10:40 am
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“enjoy your glory days while they last”
Will do… Now go home and get yer fuckin’ shinebox!
Comment by sonofsamford — March 28, 2008 @ 10:50 am
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8 - Yeah, we lost that one. I’m sure your team has never incurred an embarrassing loss. Especially never before 1990, which is when football started, right?
These last 10 years have sucked and we’ve had some shitty times, but it sure will make the rise to the top all the more fun. Not guaranteeing that we’re going to just dominate, but I think you’ll see Bama teams more like 91-94 than 2000-2007 in the coming years, and I’ll take that.
Comment by Sad State of Affairs — March 28, 2008 @ 10:56 am
11
Sonof @ #9
That’s a great comeback.
Just remember that the Terry Bowden look alike that uttered those words ended up beaten to the point of death and buried in a cornfield.
Comment by Picture Me Rollin — March 28, 2008 @ 11:02 am
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11 - Or shot in the back of the head when he thought he was getting made.
Comment by Sad State of Affairs — March 28, 2008 @ 11:15 am
13
Billy Batts resurfaced as Phil Leotardo, who, in my opinion, bears no resemblance to Tot.
Comment by sonofsamford — March 28, 2008 @ 11:15 am
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Ever since I can remember, I wanted to be a bammer.
Comment by lawtool — March 28, 2008 @ 11:20 am
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Apologies- I fucked that all up. I credited Pesci’s character in “Goodfellas” with the line but it was Batts speaking to Pesci’s character (as you correctly pointed out Sonof). Then to make it worse I continued my faulty character development line and credited JP’s death in “Casinso”.
The point was, with either character, it ended badly after running off at the dick sucker.
Comment by Picture Me Rollin — March 28, 2008 @ 11:24 am
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#10 - You guys sound like Florida State fans.. “We’ll be good one day like back in the 90’s!!!! Just you wait and see!”
Comment by ALGator — March 28, 2008 @ 11:29 am
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@ 10
I for one don’t need the 90’s. I’d be happy with October 1, 2005.
That’d be just fine with me.
Comment by Picture Me Rollin — March 28, 2008 @ 11:40 am
18
FSU will not be good until Bowden retires and either Mark Richt has a “Momma Called….” moment or Jimbo Fisher can mind-meld with Bobby and extract whatever he can from circa 1990 - 2000.
Comment by Techie — March 28, 2008 @ 11:40 am
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I meant @ 16, ALGator
It’s been a long week. I’m just gonna take the next few plays off.
Comment by Picture Me Rollin — March 28, 2008 @ 11:41 am
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Auburn has played football longer than Alabama. We also didn’t open against a high school team. We also didn’t change our name after tying a rival. We also didn’t adopt an elephant after beating a 3-5-1 Ole Miss team.
Turdision - a celebration of mediocrity.
Comment by NewAZTiger — March 28, 2008 @ 11:44 am
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#17 - and I’ll take a national championship ring, and a heisman trophy since that date. I’ll also take an asswhipping from Auburn two years in a row as long as I keep filling the trophy case
Comment by ALGator — March 28, 2008 @ 11:51 am
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20 -
Yes, but Alabama didn’t take a hayride and make fake national championships when it went undefeated.
Comment by Sad State of Affairs — March 28, 2008 @ 12:14 pm
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Fake national championships?!??!??? A Bammer talking about Fake National Championships??!???!??
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! *snort*AAAUUURRRGGGGGGHHH!!! Diet coke in the nose.
You’re not serious, are you?
Comment by NewAZTiger — March 28, 2008 @ 12:27 pm
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This from the Huntsville paper - from someone who has WAY too much time on their hands, I’ll add….
“After researching head-to-head games since 1980 when both teams were nationally ranked heading into the Iron Bowl, here’s what he found:
“Auburn is 7-1 over the last 28 years when both teams were ranked,” notes Bobby, “and in four of those games, Alabama was the higher-ranked team. So it would seem that when Alabama’s good, Auburn can be good as well, and better at least half the time.”
There’s more. “Looking at the games Alabama has won in those years suggests that, quite the opposite to conventional wisdom, Alabama seems to be good when Auburn is down,” says Bobby.
He points out that in the 12 years Alabama won the Iron Bowl since 1980, Auburn has been down half the time. The Tigers finished 5-6 in 1980 and ‘81, 9-4 in ‘84, 8-4 in ‘85, 8-3-1 in ‘90, 5-6 in ‘91, 5-5-1 in ‘92, 9-1-1 in ‘94, 8-4 in ‘96, 3-8 in ‘98, 5-6 in ‘99 and 7-5 in 2001.
“The facts seem to indicate that since Bear Bryant, Alabama’s usually only good when Auburn is down,” Bobby writes. “But why let facts ruin a good myth?” ”
But - Screws up our MO of being the underdog and flying under the radar, so don’t tell anyone!
Comment by ATL AU Tiger — March 28, 2008 @ 12:46 pm
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23 - I posted this earlier. Take the time to read it and get back to me with a response. Seriously, I want to know what you think about this.
Taken from a poster named Alacyclone on Rivals (from different posts, so some repeats). Anyway, this could maybe shed some light once and for all.
How many should they claim?
The 7 AP and / or UPI Titles from 1961 (AP and UPI), 1964 (AP and UPI), 1965 (AP), 1973 (UPI), 1978 (AP), 1979 (AP and UPI) and 1992 (AP and UPI)? Do they count?
What about the 3 Undefeated, Untied Rose Bowl Championship teams before the AP Era (1936) from 1925, 1930 and 1934? Do they count?
That’s 10 right there.
So, 1926 and 1941 are questionable, but ‘Bama has two more Undefeated, Untied Bowl Championship teams in the AP (1936) / UPI (1950) Era that Alabama DOES NOT CLAIM (1945 and 1966).
Alabama claims 7 AP and / or UPI MNCs: 1961 (AP and UPI), 1964 (AP and UPI), 1965 (AP), 1973 (UPI), 1978 (AP), 1979 (AP and UPI) and 1992 (AP and UPI)…Auburn claims 1: 1957 (AP).
Alabama claims 4 MNCs from the Pre-AP Era…
THREE of those teams were Undefeated, Untied Rose Bowl Championship teams (1925, 1930 and 1934)…Auburn has ZERO Undefeated, Untied Bowl Championship teams from the Pre-A.P. Era.
One of those was an Undefeated, once tied Rose Bowl Co-Championship team from 1926
Alabama claims ONE Mickey Mouse MNC during the AP Era (1941)…
On top of all of this, Alabama has two Undefeated, Untied Bowl Championship teams (1945 and 1966) that are not claimed as MNC teams
Alabama was declared and claims MNCs from 1925, 1926, 1930 and 1934 in the pre-AP days by selectors of their time. Those are not retroactive.
If you go by Undefeated, Untied Bowl Championship teams ONLY, Alabama has EIGHT (1925, 1930, 1934, 1945, 1961, 1966, 1979 and 1992),
Comment by Sad State of Affairs — March 28, 2008 @ 1:57 pm
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I’ve only got one word for all of you Iron Bowl trash talking bastards…
eat my shit bastards
Comment by dave — March 28, 2008 @ 3:34 pm
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The only thing that would have made that even better, would have been to have Forrest Gump, matted in the crowd like he was in several shots of the movie, and him standing there with his blank look as Saban walked through…the crowd.
Comment by Havok — March 28, 2008 @ 4:05 pm
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This sent to me a while back from a friend -
1930 National Championship- The Davis poll says that Bama tied Notre Dame for NC this year. This was the only one to award it to Bama. Notre Dame was named NC in 6 polls! Parke Davis is another retroactive system! He (an individual, not an organization) did his in 1933!
1934 National Championship- Alabama says they share this with two other teams. The awarders are Dunkel, Williamson, and Football Thesaurus. Dunkel was an individual who came up with his own system. Williamson was a geologist who came up with his own system. Football Thesaurus first appeared in 1946!
1941 National Championship- The AP ranked Alabama 20th in the nation with 14 teams with better records in the top 20. Once again it is the Football Thesaurus that retroactively awards it. Alabama finished 3rd in the SEC that year. Mississippi State won the SEC title..yet Bama claims a National title!
1961 National Championship- Finally a legitimate NC. .
1964 National Championship- While the AP did award the NC to Bama (10-1-0), Arkansas had the better record, 11-0. Alabama played Texas in their bowl and LOST. The AP final poll was before the bowl.
1965 National Championship- The AP gave this to Bama. That year there were three teams with better records than Bama. Bama 9-1-1, Michigan St 10-1-0, Arkansas 10-1-0, Nebraska 10-1-0.
1973 National Championship- AP puts Bama 4th after their bowl game loss. Bama claims a NC from the UPI poll that was taken before they met Notre Dame in the bowl game and lost. There were 3 teams with better records than Bama that year. The embarrassment of naming Alabama number one caused the UPI to name champions after bowl games.
1978 National Championship- AP gives this to Alabama(11-1-0) even though USC (12-1-0) had the better record Guess who Alabama lost to that year? USC! UPI gave the NC to USC.
1979 National Championship- Their second legitimate NC. Their first Unanimous NC.
1992 National Championship- Their third legitimate NC. Their second Unanimous NC.
Comment by ATL AU TGR — March 28, 2008 @ 4:34 pm
29
#17,
You’d be happy with the day that ended Tyrone Prothro’s career? You’re kidding, right? (I still taste a little vomit in the back of my throat when I remember the picture of “The Break” appearing in the Tuscaloosa News)
I’ll take everything else, right up to that one play (when Shula should have pulled him).
Comment by the croominator — March 28, 2008 @ 4:39 pm
30
Prothro aside, that has been Alabama’s most complete game against quality competition in quite some time. Obviously I wouldn’t wish injury (especially of that nature) on anyone, even Tennessee or Auburn. The comment was directed to my Gator friend comparing Alabama to Florida State longing for the glory days. I’m just ready to win again in the manner that Alabama should be capable of when it shrugs off all the irons. Hopefully in another season or two (this one would be fine as well, it’s just hard to get too excited when there is so little experience on defense) they will do just that.
Football is so cyclical and anyone who believes that it will stay a certain way, good or bad, just isn’t being realistic. All the things are in place at Alabama for them to return as a power. If LSU, Oklahoma, USC, and dare I say Auburn can do it, so can Alabama. Everyone is just so impatient and wants to indicate that any stumble is a sign that things are not getting better and that’s double for most Alabama fans. That just simply isn’t the case.
Comment by Picture Me Rollin — March 28, 2008 @ 4:51 pm
31
NewAZTiger -
Guess not, huh?
Sorry I let facts get in the way of your hilarious, though grossly ignorant, joke.
I’m pretty upset, though, b/c I really was looking forward to your response. Please let me know how many championships you think that Bama should have, backing it up with facts.
Or, I guess, just shrug all this aside and pull the inevitable “Bama cheats!” “6!” etc. response. I’m sure that’s easier AND keeps your Aubren fan prerequisite of constantly denying Bama’s unapproachable accomplishments intact.
Comment by Sad State of Affairs — March 28, 2008 @ 5:21 pm
32
Don’t pull a muscle patting yourself on the back just because you can repeat yourself multiple times in a single post. Even your slant can’t sugarcoat how “unapproachably” wrong the ‘41 claim is. Your information is inconsistent. If 36 and 50 were undefeated and untied years, then why don’t you list them with the other eight? You also never gave a final tally. I think you mean 8 or 10 are actually legit by one form of reckoning or another, so I don’t see how you pwn3d NewAZTiger. More importantly, when are the ‘Got 12?’ shirts getting recalled?
None of it really matters anyway. A few different periods in the last century, Alabama was a good football team. It’s doing wonders for them right now.
Comment by weagle251 — March 28, 2008 @ 5:44 pm
33
29 -
Man, there’s so much I’d like to respond to in that last post, so bear with me.
If nothing else, I’ll take the undefeated, untied seasons. I know Nebraska has 7, USC has like 5, ND like 5, and so on, and I’m not sure if anyone has anymore than that (though I’m not by any means saying Bama has the most, and I could be wrong about the other school’s totals, but I think they’re close). That being said, no matter how you shake it, Bama is near the top of all time, and, by counting much like ALL THE REST OF THE SCHOOLS IN THE FREAKING COUNTRY, Bama easily has 12, but could count more. If you’re so hung up on the 1941 season, then just replace it with the 1966 season.
In all honesty, I don’t know why they claim them the way they do, but the irrefutable truth of the matter is that Bama is near the very top of all time and could easily claim more than it does, but, at minimum, the 8 untied, undefeated seasons, which, if that was the measuring stick for everyone, Bama would still remain at the top, if not at the top.
Also, do you not see the incredible lameness of saying “well, you should have ONLY 8, 10, 11, etc championships” when your school only has at best 2? It certainly is ironic that in diminishing your rival’s accomplishments as best you can, you still can only bring the total down to roughly 4 times that of your own team.
Also, why these successes “don’t matter anyway?” If these successes don’t matter, then why be a fan of your team, or of college football for that matter? If they don’t matter, then why are there multi-million dollar contracts to televise games, especially championship games? Do you think LSU, Florida, etc. think those titles they just won don’t matter? I’m having a hard time understanding why success wouldn’t matter and, in fact, it simply comes across as yet another sorry way to try to diminish successes of your rival that you know will never be eclipsed by your own team. You know damn good and well that, had the teams’ successes been reversed, you would think they mattered and would have enjoyed the hell out of those seasons. As it is, comments like that just come across as sour grapes.
And, yes, all those good seasons from long ago apparently do mean something to about 30 18 year olds who happen to comprise the highest rated incoming freshman class in the nation. In many of their interviews, they stated that they knew of Bama’s great tradition and how they wanted to be the ones to restore the team to prominence. It certainly means a lot to the 92k fans who poured into Bryant Denney for a spring game (tremendous fan support - another reason cited by these recruits) and who come in week after week to see the Tide play.
Those past successes also will translate into more national TV appearances, favorable poll positions, etc. that are enjoyed perennially by the top 10 all-time programs and whoever is doing great at the time. Take Notre Dame, for example. Again, huge successes in recruiting, NBC contract, and will always get the benefit of the doubt in anything from poll position to Heisman finalists. But wait, they haven’t won it all in an even longer period than Bama. How do they enjoy all of these things if they haven’t been good lately?
Comment by Sad State of Affairs — March 28, 2008 @ 7:10 pm
34
TT-
The dark fucking knight.
If you cut the man’s chest open, you would find nothing but black coal that leads towards an endless abyss. Staring intently into the abyss you will start to see the rough hewn image of a little fucking bowden in sneakers yelling “undefeated, again”
All the torn ACLs in the Southeast won’t make that little undefeated bowden fucker shut up.
Auburn goes 2-2 in September. Croom’s a’comin…
Auburn goes 2-2 in October.
Augurn goes 2-2 in November.
6 loses will beat-out the over/under on Nationally Televised Chop-Blocks (which is four). Place your bets.
WARRRRRRRRRR EAGLE !
Comment by I'M A MAN, I'M FORTY — March 28, 2008 @ 8:07 pm
35
Alabama has exactly 0 NCAA recognized national championships.
Comment by NewAZTiger — March 28, 2008 @ 9:18 pm
36
Correction: Alabama has 0 NCAA recognized national championships in men’s sports. If men play it, and the NCAA arranges for it to be settled on the field, Bama doesn’t win.
So, we’re left with opinon polls, hand wringing, and Bammer-math that gives Bama 700 MNCs (with some we decided not to “claim”) and a convenient excuse that no-one else can use the same methods.
Auburn’s undefeated seasons
1891 (a year before Bama played Birmingham High school) AU 1-0 - road game, vs UGA.
1893 - 2-0-2.
1897 - 2-0-1 Gave up 4 points. Heisman’s last year.
1913 - 8-0-0. Bammer-quality MNC. Gave up 13 points all season. (Oops, would that be an undefeated untied pre-AP AU team? I know, I know… Don’t confuse the issue with “facts”) Billingsley MNC.
1914 - 8-0-1. Bammer-quality MNC. 17 games without a loss. Gave up 0 points all season.
1932 - 9-0-1. Another Bammer-quality MNC.
1957 - 10-0-0. AP MNC. Called “1/2″ by Bammers, despite the fact that the majority of bammer’s MNCs are split.
1958 - 9-0-1 Another back-to-back undefeated season. Bammer quality MNC, but post A-P. 20 games without a loss.
1983 - 11-1-0 Bammer-quality MNC team. Played 4 top 10 teams, lost to Texas at the opener. Went into the bowls #3, #2 and #1 lost, but Miami got the votes - going from #6 to #1. Some minor polls give AU a MNC.
1993- 11-0. Bammer quality MNC team. Only undefeated team in the nation. Best team on radio. Can’t play in a bowl because of a 400 dollar steak. Awarded MNCs by minor polls.
2004 - 13-0. Bammer-quality MNC Best team in the land. Snubbed on BCS game. Beat 5 10+ win teams, 6 9+ win teams (more than the Big 12 and Pac-10 Conferences combined). Only second team in College football history to beat 5 10+ win teams and 6 9+ win teams. Was a last-minute pass by Iowa vs LSU away from being the only team in CFB history to beat 6 10+ win teams. (Nick Saban’s last game and he left points on the field)
That’s 8 Bammer-quality MNCs. 1 AP MNC, and a couple of great teams with bad luck in an opinion poll. All the while, AU has a winning record vs Bama vs all Bama coaches not named Bryant, and the series lead is only 9 games for Alabama - the smallest lead that any major state school has over the land-grant school in the state. And Auburn has done that while playing 66 games of the series in one of Alabama’s home stadiums. Auburn is 11-2 on campuses, and has a 3 century winning streak in Tuscaloosa.
Alabama, to this very day, celebrates it’s tie with Auburn. That Napoleon complex is pervasive in Alabama’s culture, and it is why they feel the need to overindulge their record, and laugh at others who use the same methods to come up with “extra” MNCs.
So Roll Tide, Roll. Remember, the Crimson Tide started the day you tied Auburn. Before that, you were just a thin red line.
Comment by NewAZTiger — March 28, 2008 @ 9:44 pm
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#34 - did you really just misspell your home team’s stadium?
Let me tell you Bama’s problem - Nick Saban can’t defend the spread. There are 9 spread teams on Bama’s schedule next year. Two that aren’t just have more talent - UGA/LSU. The third- UT - is an away game.
Comment by NewAZTiger — March 28, 2008 @ 9:48 pm
38
Again, huge successes in recruiting, NBC contract, and will always get the benefit of the doubt in anything from poll position to Heisman finalists.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAA.
I’ve won as many Heisman trophies as Bama has.
Comment by NewAZTiger — March 28, 2008 @ 9:49 pm
39
how about SEC championships? theres only one per year, and it’s decided on the field. Bama has 20, how many does aubie have? anything close to 20? double digits even? didn’t think so.
Comment by tempebamafan — March 28, 2008 @ 11:41 pm
40
answer to my own question just for the record. Aubie has 4 outright SEC championships, 2 “co-championships” (there goes my whole point about one per year, but whatever) and I stand corrected about bama as well. Bama has 16 outrught SEC championships and 5 “co-championships” (the co-championships were pre 1991, before the SECCG came into play) so were looking at either 16 to 4 or 21 to 6. either way aubie doesn’t come close.
Comment by tempebamafan — March 28, 2008 @ 11:48 pm
41
Sad State -
I meant that arguing over mythical nat’l championships on the internet doesn’t matter and makes no difference, but thanks for the entertaining tangent.
Comment by weagle251 — March 29, 2008 @ 7:33 am
42
oh yeah baby… that’s the kind of hate I’m talkin bout!
like a shark smelling blood, this shit makes me twitchy thinking about the first kickoff next August
BTW…how many of you ex-jocks still twitch every time you are about to see a good lick on TV? Man, my head bobs and my forearm tightens in the most wonderful Pavlov fashion
Comment by Futbawl Fan — March 29, 2008 @ 7:59 am
43
How many chop blocks just Bama have on National Tv? By the same player in the same year?
What every one else sees is that Auburn has had the chance to be better in the past, but never lives up to the hype or potential? Why? Auburns coach just doesnt give a shit. Why? The admin at AU dont give a rats ass about him. Therefore, Auburn will never win a MNC as long as Tubbs is there under that Admin, ever since JetGate. The losing of both coordinators on a loaded upcoming year for the defense should be the equivalent of jumping off of the Titanic before it hit the iceberg…..and that Iceberg was Alabama having the best ever recruiting class while Auburn has a great “character class”……Yeh, Auburn has had a good run, but I am telling you, the payback will be painful….
and I’ll take National Championships over Heismans everyday……..at least Georgias last Heisman winner got them a Championship ring
Comment by Mr Pelican Pants — March 30, 2008 @ 9:23 am
44
#43 - Bama had a player chop-block Dorsey in the Bama-LSU game. He was called for it. Chop-blocking is part of football, because cut-blocking is a common technique, and if you’re cut blocking and the guy next to you hits the wrong assignment, you get called for chop-blocking.
The AU line was called for 1 major chop-block all year - during the Clemson game - and it was by the left side of the line. The missed chop-block call was by the right side of the line.
AU’s chop-block was only memorable because the CBS announcer went on about it for about 15 minutes, then ESPN carried it.
And if you can’t remember that, I’m going to chop-block you, for Afganistan, of course.
Comment by NewAZTiger — March 30, 2008 @ 2:17 pm
45
I am selling the newest and freshest invention to get in shape since jogging. Its called Hip Hop Chop Block.
You and your sparring partner simply try to chop block one another several times in a 2 hour period, all to the sounds of Hip Hop artist “Choppa”. It has already been included in Auburns “4th quarter” program in the past offseason with great results.
Comment by Hip Hop Chop Block — March 30, 2008 @ 2:52 pm
46
Simply amazing that any discussion of the current streak rapidly reverts to a discussion of ancient football history as soon as a bama fan can figure out his keyboard. Yes, you were great once. Get over it and talk about something that happened after your current players were born.
And at least get your facts right. (Auburn does have more SEC titles than GT.)
Comment by ChemE93 — March 31, 2008 @ 8:16 am
47
Dang, y’all. This was fun. Now when do we get to see a handful of Georgia and Georgia Tech fans show their asses?
Comment by NCT — April 1, 2008 @ 12:02 am