ADVENTURES IN JUXTAPOSITION: OKLAHOMA NUT-RIPPER ON TRIAL
Perhaps you recall the Oklahoma church deacon and pastor who grabbed the testicles of a Texas fan and nearly ripped them from his body. Or maybe you forgot intentionally, since it involved one man RIPPING OPEN ANOTHER MAN'S FUCKING SCROTUM.
Well, he's on trial. Fun details follow!
When a pair of bar patrons tried to separate the two men, Thomas said he heard a popping sound, looked down and saw a lot of blood.
"I saw a tear and an exposed testicle," Thomas said. "I panicked."
Beckett's attorney said that Thomas was the aggressor and that his client defended himself only after the younger, bigger man went up to the bar to confront him.
And now, for no reason whatsoever, a picture of a heart-healthy pomegranate!

Oh, no reason. Why do you ask?
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cringe
I think the description of the “popping” is what did it for me. Before I even got to what the pomegranate meant.
shivers
by the croominator on Mar 27, 2008 3:49 PM EDT reply actions
a friend in high school kicked a guy in the nuts w/ a steel toed boot and caused some splittage. It looked about like that.
by ThreenOut on Mar 27, 2008 3:50 PM EDT reply actions
Dude…
This is, of course, my favorite blog, and this entry won’t change that, but…dude.
by CKGator on Mar 27, 2008 4:04 PM EDT reply actions
if anyone’s interested, here’s the link to the online court docket
no trial date yet – pretrial conference scheduled for april 16th – i’m going to try like hell to make the trial and give you guys updates
while i condone violence in general towards all longhorns, i cannot condone testicle ripping of any sorts – if there’s any justice in the world, the jury will all be oklahoma state fans (which is likely, since only aggies are too dumb to get out of jury duty)
by okiedomer on Mar 27, 2008 4:06 PM EDT reply actions
While this is an example of a psychopathic fan that, while I don’t know this for certain, has nor ever had any academic ties to the university. The “special” fans (and they’re group is accounted for at every major “southern” – Big 12, SEC, ACC) always seem to liven things up. One thing stands, though. OU texas is, without question, the most hate fueled rivalry in sports. I don’t give a rip if ESPN goes on and on over Yankees and Red Sox, Duke and UNC, Michigan and Ohio St. Have they ever ripped one another’s junk off? I think not. Regardless, as an alumnus, I refuse any association with said sack-ripper.
by them oklahoma on Mar 27, 2008 4:09 PM EDT reply actions
As a pansy-ass bleeding-heart liberal, I am very much opposed to the death penalty, but if ever there was a case that called for it, this is that case.
I am drafting a new constitutional amendment to be brought before the full U.S. Congress sometime later on this year: THOU SHALT NOT HARM ANOTHER MAN’S SCROTUM. Or something to that effect.
by Doug on Mar 27, 2008 4:12 PM EDT reply actions
I was flagging a little here until I read this post – now I’m awake, but not in a good way.
by DC Trojan on Mar 27, 2008 4:25 PM EDT reply actions
My testicles are hiding between my lungs now, thanks.
by Oops Pow Surprise on Mar 27, 2008 4:25 PM EDT reply actions
This whole story and especially that picture make me want to vomit – and not in a good way.
by Picture Me Rollin on Mar 27, 2008 4:41 PM EDT reply actions
Holly – do I detect a little Lorena Bobbit sarcasm tone there?
by Out of Conference on Mar 27, 2008 4:44 PM EDT reply actions
6….. I agree with you……………… you pansy-ass bleeding-heart liberal
by Tide Druid on Mar 27, 2008 4:51 PM EDT reply actions
2 Questions -
1) If he could see his testicles, much less an exposed testicle torn from the scrotum, where were his pants?
2) Wouldn’t ripping another man’s balls off be second nature to a federal auditor?
by Mark on Mar 27, 2008 5:57 PM EDT reply actions
Rest assured I won’t be writing any injury reports about that.
by Paragon SC on Mar 27, 2008 6:06 PM EDT reply actions
Let’ s just say that this won’t increase POM sales among the edsbs.com reader base. Not that they were too high to begin with.
by Chips O'Toole on Mar 27, 2008 6:17 PM EDT reply actions
do I detect a little Lorena Bobbit sarcasm tone there?
The hell? No. That was fucking queasifying.
by Holly on Mar 27, 2008 6:29 PM EDT reply actions
Jackie sherril wannabe
Suck – it Aggies!
by I'm a man, I'm forty on Mar 27, 2008 6:37 PM EDT reply actions
10 -
Is there a good way to “want to vomit”?
by WarCardinals on Mar 27, 2008 7:25 PM EDT reply actions
- -
1) The pants were white, which made it even worse.
2) Yes.
by Trojan Chica on Mar 27, 2008 7:36 PM EDT reply actions
the blueberry pom is delicious. At first i thought it was a cranberry topped cheesecake. Then I realized what was going on, and drove to the store to get a cup.
by Brian on Mar 27, 2008 8:00 PM EDT reply actions
Wonder what the Oklahoma guy would have done if the other one was wearing a Boise State t-shirt?
by ALGator on Mar 27, 2008 9:10 PM EDT reply actions
I just want to add: When you eat a pomegranate, you support terrorism and Totalitarian regimes. That is all.
by Brian on Mar 27, 2008 10:44 PM EDT reply actions
Wait a second, this guy is an Oklahoma PASTOR????!!!!
What kind of church is he running over there? I mean if he’s the pastor, I’d hate to see what the laity is like.
by Jeff from LA on Mar 28, 2008 1:48 PM EDT reply actions
When you eat a pomegranate, you support terrorism and Totalitarian regimes. That is all.
Is there anything that doesn’t do that? Aside from maybe shade grown coffee from a Nicaraguan syndicalist collective, transported north via organic burro?
by DC Trojan on Mar 28, 2008 1:48 PM EDT reply actions

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