CURIOUS INDEX, 3/25/08
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Karma’s a motherfucker. Clemson’s losing tailbacks just after they cut Ray-Ray McElrathbey. Make a snide laugh now, because this will all end up with Tommy Bowden running through the streets of Clemson handing out cooked goose on Christmas and embracing crippled children. The part with the ghost of Christmas Past featuring Jackie Sherrill in the role will be especially frightening, because Sherrill will be naked and drunk. Bears Necessity examines out of conference schedules and concludes that the Big East is the real out-of-conference road warrior–and that’s not just the Mountaineers calling in either with their traditional forty point bowl shootout. He also notes that business class on Singapore airlines rules. If it doesn’t come with a complimentary compulsory caning of a random passenger in coach for chewing gum too loudly in their seat, it’s NOT Singapore Airlines! Bill Callahan had them playing tag, dammit. We would kill for an uncensored spring practice audio of Bo Pelini in his first spring as Nebraska head football coach working with the defense. According to Pelini: Callahan wouldn’t call what he had the defense doing tag, exactly; rather, it was a “binomial game of optional tactical label transfer, with status dependent on pursuit, angle calculation, and escape strategies.” Or, yeah: tag. Heivaha Mafi: can haz hair. Heivaha Mafi, Juco transfer for UNLV, is your latest shock-haired raging Polynesian badass, according to the Runnin’ Rebels coach Mike Sanford: “(Mafi’s) got a lot of hair,” coach Mike Sanford said, “and he plays with it on fire.” Mafi’s playing for a starting spot at the hybrid DE/LB spot, marking yet another appearance of the Patriot end in college football out of a flexy 3-4 that can, in a snap, morph to a 4-3. They call Alabama The Crimson Tide, so call me Faggy McGee. The greatest hangover/sleep deprivation song ever helped us through a long, airport delay-ridden day yesterday. The story behind the chorus: It was originally speculated that the song was written about the Wake Forest University Demon Deacons, but in a Rolling Stone interview, Donald Fagen said “Walter and I had been working on that song at a house in Malibu. I played him that line, and he said, “You mean it’s like, ‘They call these cracker assholes this grandiose name like the Crimson Tide, and I’m this loser, so they call me this other grandiose name, Deacon Blues?’ ” And I said, “Yeah!” He said, “Cool! Let’s finish it!” Thank you, cracker assholes of Alabama, for making that song happen. Oh, and for beating us twice in 1999. That was awesome. |
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25
#13 has a point…
In-Conference games are always tougher than they should be.
Comment by CincySooner — March 25, 2008 @ 11:49 am
24
I mean it! I’m going to take this poland stick it up your…….
/wales aloud with laughter
Comment by hunglikehussain — March 25, 2008 @ 11:33 am
23
Steely Dan gargles my balls.
Comment by WarCardinals — March 25, 2008 @ 11:29 am
22
OOC@#9
Whoa, is it getting chilie in here or what?
/couldn’t resist
Comment by hunglikehussain — March 25, 2008 @ 11:01 am
21
The Nebraska spring conference was a hilarious mix of generic “rah rah rah spring ball” comments and “cleverly bash the previous goof of a coaching staff” comments.
Comment by Rob — March 25, 2008 @ 10:54 am
20
OC Phil #13 - next time use the sarcasm tag. You almost had me fooled for a sec there.
Comment by Out of Conference — March 25, 2008 @ 10:46 am
19
How’s come right after comment 17 is a “certified Christian” singles’ ad? Is this what Google ads connects with “dildo”?
Yikes.
Comment by Cock D — March 25, 2008 @ 10:40 am
18
Well I have a newfound respect for a band that typically makes my skin crawl.
Comment by Vol — March 25, 2008 @ 10:30 am
17
Only in the 70’s could you get away with naming a soft-rock band after a dildo.
Comment by jakldawg — March 25, 2008 @ 10:23 am
16
Donald Fagen also said that Koko’s not truly dead until smooth music is.
Comment by PW — March 25, 2008 @ 10:12 am
15
gerry@10
Your guiana make me mad if I hear another South American joke.
Comment by hunglikehussain — March 25, 2008 @ 10:09 am
14
That was an annoying song.
Comment by Anonymous IV — March 25, 2008 @ 10:02 am
13
I don’t care about conference chest thumping. But any methodology that assigns points to games with penalize the Pac 10 for turning the additional game into another conference game instead of a chance to feast on another cupcake, the way the other BCS conferences did.
I’d be amazed if any team can match USC’s OOC schedule next year. Virginia, tOSU, and Notre Dame.
Comment by oc phil — March 25, 2008 @ 9:56 am
12
Reason number 1 for bashing Alabama fans:
That fucking ugly ass hat that BEHAAARRR Bryant was always wearing, and the fucking stickers that pay homage to the resemblance of said hat on the back of their Chevy* Tahoes.
* Cuz that’s what Earnhardt drives!
Comment by ALGator — March 25, 2008 @ 9:52 am
11
“They low down, they dirty, and they snitches.”
Comment by Anonymous IV — March 25, 2008 @ 9:47 am
10
steely dan BALOOOOOOWS…but that is a good story behing the chorus.
aaaahhhh ‘99…those were good times. back before freddie milons faded into bolivia.
Comment by gerry dorsey — March 25, 2008 @ 9:46 am
9
Do I need to remind you motherfuckers about copyright infringement? It’s OOC©.
Comment by Out of Conference — March 25, 2008 @ 9:46 am
8
My brother and I are working on a look ahead at next year’s non-conference schedules - the prologue explaining the methodology and conference rankings are up now, but the rest should be coming in the next few weeks.
(end shameless plug)
The Big East should have a better OOC than everyone else, since they play 5 OOC games every year…
Comment by ehrenb — March 25, 2008 @ 9:34 am
7
It’s coming. We’re just waiting on a photoshop.
Comment by Orson Swindle — March 25, 2008 @ 9:31 am
6
Nothing on the latest Stephen Garcia bust?
http://www.thetandd.com/articles/2008/03/24/sports/usc/doc47e8285801e29587407496.txt
Comment by gurn — March 25, 2008 @ 9:27 am
5
“Grandiose cracker assholes.” Perfect.
Smart guys, Don and Walt. I tip my Cuervo Gold in their general direction.
Comment by Flibbetigibbet — March 25, 2008 @ 9:12 am
4
At least you can sympathize with Tennessee for losing to AU twice in 2004. Sorry Holly.
Comment by SEC Supremacist — March 25, 2008 @ 9:12 am
3
The asian fever in me says I need to watch Omaha news more often.
Comment by meatybob — March 25, 2008 @ 9:11 am
2
The tag joke would be funny if it weren’t true.
Nebraska would have been just as bad last year if it was touch football.
Comment by ThreenOut — March 25, 2008 @ 9:10 am
1
Steely Dan > Steely McBeam (if only by default)
Comment by Biggus Rickus — March 25, 2008 @ 9:02 am