CURIOUS INDEX, 3/20/08

by Adam Jacobi on Mar 20, 2008 12:33 PM EDT

This post is brought to you by Three Inches of Bloodsport (WARNING: Pops directly to loud audio, workers beware), the greatest concert you will attend today. Click the link, leave it open for 15 minutes, and bask in the glory. There's nothing you can pay money to see that's half as entertaining. Nothing.

Goodbye, gorgeous: Those of you who are still members of the Virginia Tech Hokies, please raise your hands. Not so fast, Brandon Ore. Or Marcus Vick (What's he still doing here? Security!!!). Ore was unceremoniously dismissed from the team by Frank Beamer yesterday, citing factors that, though comprising dozens of words, all sound exactly like "tired of his shit." Ore is a redshirt senior, which means he's about to make a I-AA team very happy next fall. Until they tire of his shit too, of course, but whatever. In the meantime, SMQ breaks it down harder than the fifteen seconds before Hammer Time.

Nothing going on today: Boy, it's just a lazy Thursday, isn't it? Football's over five months away, most teams aren't in on the spring practices yet, baseball's a few days away... not much to talk about in sports at all, is there? Nope.

Oh, that: Yes, it's the greatest day for college basketball, and here I am running EDSBS. This makes so much sense. Orson has taken the correct approach to filling out his bracket: a massive dose of firearms. Good luck with Belmont!

Hey look, the trustees think they have a say in the matter!: Penn State trustees have announced that they'll be looking at the Joe Paterno situation at their next meeting, which is adorable. Joe Paterno will take the field at Happy Valley next fall, either under contract or by Napoleonic force. Mock his diminutive stature and zoological classification of "mangoblin" if you must, but Paterno has the resiliency that only comes from absurd science fiction, like Rocky or Rudy or The Little Engine That Could (in real life, all three would have been sold for spare parts). Plus the last time PSU AD Tim Curley tried to talk to JoePa about leaving, his marriage was ruined.

Tweet Comment 20 comments | 0 recs |

Do you like this story?

Comments

In depth article, OPS. How long before this becomes a Bama-Barner threadjack?

by Out of Conference on Mar 20, 2008 12:35 PM EDT reply actions

Leaving an Iowa fan in charge of EDSBS is a horrible horrible mistake. OPS won’t be able to post fast enough. But the ones that do get put up will be much smarter.

by WhiteSpeedReceiver on Mar 20, 2008 12:50 PM EDT reply actions

i listened/watched 29 seconds of 3 inches of bloodsport and then went out and committed a hate crime.

by gerry dorsey on Mar 20, 2008 12:55 PM EDT reply actions

There’s only one thing that could get Paterno to leave Happy Valley, and that is an unplanned bowel movement. If someone ever tells him about Depends, God help us all.

by Ground0EastLansing on Mar 20, 2008 12:59 PM EDT reply actions

Had the volume turned up too loud when it started. That was a mistake.

by Brian on Mar 20, 2008 1:03 PM EDT reply actions

I just did a split across two office chairs.

by Allahver Fist on Mar 20, 2008 1:05 PM EDT reply actions

I wouldn’t be surprised to see Ore enter the supplemental draft. It worked for Dave Brown!

by ChemE93 on Mar 20, 2008 1:31 PM EDT reply actions

OPS, Bammers, and Barners – my apologies for my first comment. I posted as a wiseass when OPS had only the title “Orson Swindle’s Curiosities…” scroll heading with no article text. My comment now makes no sense, which doesn’t mean I think any of my intentional comments do either. Carry on, gentle people.

by Out of Conference on Mar 20, 2008 2:04 PM EDT reply actions

Want a peek at scholarship offer letters?

http://www.barkingcarnival.com/henryjames/letters-we-get-letters-lots-and-lots-of-letters

by Orangeblood on Mar 20, 2008 2:38 PM EDT reply actions

Nebraska fan is super-duper sad about Brandon Ore. Honestly.

by Albino Tornado on Mar 20, 2008 2:54 PM EDT reply actions

- my sister made one of those pages. They seem to work. Except on this kid’s I didnt see anything regarding his academic prowess, if any.

by Brian on Mar 20, 2008 3:04 PM EDT reply actions

But, O!

Where’s the ’stache?

by NRBQ on Mar 20, 2008 3:22 PM EDT reply actions

Don’t feel too badly about it—you’re still right on the threadjack that will surely come any post now…

by CKGator on Mar 20, 2008 3:34 PM EDT reply actions

#10

The sadness is overwhelming, let me tell you.

*Sadness brought to you by the sweet and spicy taste of Dorothy Lynch.

by Rob on Mar 20, 2008 3:36 PM EDT reply actions

If you go to Forcier’s photos section in the “Tate on Tour” collage, there’s a picture of him at Happy Valley shaking hands with a man who appears to be Rick Neuheisel. That takes “slick” recruiting to a whole ’nother level.

by George on Mar 20, 2008 3:42 PM EDT reply actions