FIxed to reflect typical American dining habits.

While all of that sounds like one tasty gut-bomb of a breakfast, I still have to give it to the Bloomin’ Onion. The reasoning behind this is simple: the people who run Outback Steakhouse fully expect you to continue eating after downing that behemoth of an appetizer. Never mind you just ate an entire day’s worth of calories, and probably 3 days’ worth of carbs, cholesterol, and fat, go ahead and order a porterhouse, maybe a side of potato slices and a large Coke. I just hope someone is there to jump start your heart with a car battery after attempting to move away from the table with any reasonable speed.

Coincidentally, for breakfast this morning I had two medium eggs fried in extra-virgin olive oil, 2 pieces of whole wheat toast, and a glass of water. The grand total? Around 300 calories. I guess I’m trying not to collapse from massive heart failure before the age of 25.

It must be from the flour and butter milk that I’m guessing the use to make the batter? Although that still seems a little high, but they would have no reason to lie when they’re still publishing the rest of that heart-numbing stat-line.

let the record show that i eat them anyway b/c they are just so damned tasty.

http://www.recipetrove.com/component/option,com_mtree/task,viewlink/link_id,122/Itemid,26/

Listen, i found various recipes on how to make these marvelous motherfuckers, and in no way can I figure out how the hell there’s 35 grams of protein in one.

That sounded a little strange to me too. I looked it up, and one raw onion only has 2 grams of protein. So even if one Bloomin Onion contained 3 onions, that means the batter and mayo mix has some mega protein in it.

Add an Outback porterhouse to that and a loaded potato and one of their desserts, and call your cardiologist and bariatric surgeon in the morning.

If you wanted to act like an English person and substitute baked beans for the black pudding, I suppose you could.