CURIOUS INDEX, 2/28/08

by Orson on Feb 28, 2008 10:47 AM EST

Good: Fighting on Bourbon Street. Better: Fighting poorly on Bourbon Street. Best: getting shoved around by a tiny little UGA girl after getting repeatedly pwned by a Georgia fan who tosses you to the ground several times in a row.

(We opted, per a request, to take this video down. In its place, we give you the underwater fight scene from Top Secret. Apologies.)

The Auburn fan in questions baffles us: he doesn't throw a punch, doesn't really even attempt to fight, doesn't even really attempt to score. Oh, wait, he's just internalized Al Borges' 2007 offense. That answers all of our questions nicely. (DAMMIT THREE POINTS! THREE FUCKING POINTS! IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK FOR, CRUEL GOD?)

Arizona State is looking to extend the contract of Dennis Erickson with a one-year contract extension, meaning that they not only understand Dennis Erickson's talent as a coach, they also understand his attention span. If they're especially wise, they'll have little fidgety things like Kooshes and stress balls all over the table when they begin negotiations.

TCU is so banged-up they're moving practice back to give people time to heal. This may happen to EDSBS after we go to cover the first weekend of mad wagering in Las Vegas for the NCAA tourney, since caffeine+alcohol+blogging+gambling+the city that sleep forgot=multiple possible sprains of the ACL, medulla oblongata, and soul.

Picture Me Rollin' looks at 40 times in the combine by conference and comes to a conclusion about the Crimson Tide in recent years: they're quantifiably slower than other SEC teams.

Finally, EDSBS Live is not dead. We're just learning how to use the new NowLive interface today, and getting all three people in the same place to do so is a challenge indeed. Your weekly dose of high-end profanity and football will return shortly, with all-new fresh added suck and rank amateurism.

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*sigh*

by kleph on Feb 28, 2008 10:52 AM EST reply actions

Hannah there had a look in her eye like “I am not bailing my boyfriend out of jail again, so I have to get this guy away from him.”

by Brian on Feb 28, 2008 10:57 AM EST reply actions

The Auburn fan should have had his arm us a cow’s ass instead of being on Bourbon Street.

by haybeav on Feb 28, 2008 11:02 AM EST reply actions

again

http://www.theauburner.com/ryan_boochback.html

by Wregl on Feb 28, 2008 11:03 AM EST reply actions

Is that coach Muschamp?

by sonofsamford on Feb 28, 2008 11:05 AM EST reply actions

The barner was obviously too drunk to realize he was alone and needed a friend to effectively perform a chop block…

by Greenie on Feb 28, 2008 11:06 AM EST reply actions

I keep waiting for Auburn fan’s friends to chop block those GA SOB’s.

by Last Dragon on Feb 28, 2008 11:07 AM EST reply actions

The Bourbon Street gutter is no place to end up face down in; the unmistakable smell, the black stuff it leaves on your shoes…just…ugh.

by jakldawg on Feb 28, 2008 11:09 AM EST reply actions

Dude had no chance. Hannah was wearing her black jersey.

by somedawg on Feb 28, 2008 11:12 AM EST reply actions

That was the best runblocking I’ve seen by someone named Hannah since the Patriots retired #73.

Heading to New Orleans for a conference — sure hope I can party with those guys. -JBF

by Fesser on Feb 28, 2008 11:15 AM EST reply actions

Damn… how far do you have to go out of your way to make UGA fans look like good people?

This is the reason Alabama should be caged off and dropped into the gulf, just like a squirrel trap.

by EffinDane on Feb 28, 2008 11:17 AM EST reply actions

That was basically a microcosm of the ’07 Georgia-Auburn game — Georgia beats Auburn down for a few minutes, Auburn gets back up just long enough to be beaten back down and humiliated by the black-clad Dawgs.

Boom, MF’er, indeed.

by Doug on Feb 28, 2008 11:18 AM EST reply actions

For most of the video it doesn’t look like the UGA guy is trying to FIGHT the AU guy.

by MiseanAuFan on Feb 28, 2008 11:29 AM EST reply actions

That’s BS- I closed italics after “FIGHT.”

by MiseanAuFan on Feb 28, 2008 11:30 AM EST reply actions

And Hannah handles it all without spilling her drink or losing her cigarette. Now that’s a great role model!

by SEC gal on Feb 28, 2008 11:31 AM EST reply actions

I dont know….im kinda ashamed of the fellow dawg fan.

I mean….why did you let it go that far?? And why didnt you just deck his ass the first time he got in your face!!

What is this….WWF…dude hip tossed on him..lol

by Joe on Feb 28, 2008 11:32 AM EST reply actions

Is that what you people do in your spare time?

by EZ on Feb 28, 2008 11:32 AM EST reply actions

jakldawg,

that black stuff on your shoes and jean bottoms is a little something i like to call “party gravy.” sure, you can get it at many local watering holes, no party gravy is in the same league as that found on boubon street. piss, beer, hurricanes, hand grenades, vomit, diesel fuel, lucky dog juice, horse shit, and generally blood all mixed into a sweet smelling, clothing staining concoction.

by gerry dorsey on Feb 28, 2008 11:36 AM EST reply actions

1 Cocktail
The other 999 Cocktails.

I recognize that guy. He’s the “I’m gonna kick your butt looks around … As soon as my fraternity brothers get here!” guy.

And that’s the story he gets to go home and tell people about.

by Kenny on Feb 28, 2008 11:38 AM EST reply actions

#10
I would cut my arm off to have another one @ Alabama like John Hannah. Good man, and great player.

by CapstoneAlum on Feb 28, 2008 11:40 AM EST reply actions

gerrydorsey@18

Since its NOLA, it should be ‘party roux’.

by Crabapple Buck on Feb 28, 2008 11:47 AM EST reply actions

The only thing missing from the Bourbon Street video was Hannah the UGA gal dancing the Soulja Boy in celebration after blocking the Auburn fan into Metairie . . . followed by the Auburn guy whining about Hannah being a poor sport.

by Doug on Feb 28, 2008 11:52 AM EST reply actions

I had about 12 funny comments all ready to go after watching the video ( most involving Hannah’s dexterity and the toxicity of Bourbon Street gutters) but I’ve been beaten to the punch on all of them .

by Middle America on Feb 28, 2008 12:13 PM EST reply actions

Alabama players are still 4x as fast as a Big Ten All-Star team.

by justanotherbuckye on Feb 28, 2008 12:15 PM EST reply actions

That was a pretty pathetic all-around fight. The original UGA guy was a pussy until his buddy got the AU guy in a hold. Have to say, though, very poor showing from my Auburn brethren. All the preceeding comments about it being like this past year’s UGA/AU game are spot on.

by WarCardinals on Feb 28, 2008 12:19 PM EST reply actions

Ugh. Watching someone roll around on Rue Bourbon makes me want to take a Lysol shower.

by tOSU_radar on Feb 28, 2008 12:21 PM EST reply actions

Someone get the girl on a sled!

by ChiDave on Feb 28, 2008 12:25 PM EST reply actions

Were those two f#ckin’ or fighting? I can’t tell…

by Touchdown74 on Feb 28, 2008 12:35 PM EST reply actions

#26, agreed.
Bourban street has a film on it that I’m quite sure Katrina couldn’t erase. It made my skin crawl just watching that.
The Georgia dude gets 2 points for a takedown, and an additional 2 for “ride time”. That guy must have just watched Vision Quest.

by Scalz1 on Feb 28, 2008 12:38 PM EST reply actions

those “bama” bangs were cloudin’ the poor auburn guy’s vision .

good thing that didn’t happen in gainesville — ronnie wilson would have pull out his shotgun on the auburn guy and shown him a different version of the “cock n fire”

by foley on Feb 28, 2008 12:55 PM EST reply actions

How come I can’t find a guy like that Barner pussy when I’m in a fightn’ mood…? I coulda won one by now.

by Sundawg on Feb 28, 2008 1:42 PM EST reply actions

if that was Jeremy Elder, he wouldve pulled a pellet gun on his ass

If it was Rashad Johnson, he wouldve tackled the bouncer and not gotten suspended for it

by Wregl on Feb 28, 2008 1:52 PM EST reply actions

Just say no to Pussy on Pussy crime.

by MIke on Feb 28, 2008 1:52 PM EST reply actions

Hannah doesn’t have time for this shit!

by MIke on Feb 28, 2008 1:53 PM EST reply actions

Looked like they were kissing at the very beginning

by humbaba on Feb 28, 2008 2:29 PM EST reply actions

Yeah there were a couple of parts there that looked like gay porn.

by oc phil on Feb 28, 2008 2:33 PM EST reply actions

36:

How do you know what gay porn looks like?

by Tater Salad on Feb 28, 2008 2:54 PM EST reply actions

That is my brother Wilson that got punked out by the uga fan.

by Gaines on Feb 28, 2008 2:56 PM EST reply actions

So I see you’re trying to get around the “mandatory disclosure of public appearances” statute by slipping your March Madness trip into a note about TCU spring practice.

I’ll be looking for you, Orson. Or you can save yourself the trouble of apprehensively looking over your shoulder the whole weekend and find our group. I’ll be the Red Raider with the group of SMU fans*.

If you will deign to autograph my “Professional Tailgater” t-shirt, I will fund your alcohol consumption for the evening, or as long as it takes for you to do something Youtube-worthy. I might also throw down a small wager for you.

A more diehard group of fans I’m not aware of. Sure, it’s easy to be an “Ess Eee See Speed!” fan. But these SMU guys have their tailgate set up and alcohol flowing by 9:00 sharp for an evening SMU-Tulane matchup. That’s dedication.

by Raider Red on Feb 28, 2008 3:07 PM EST reply actions

Oh, and that dude in the video has a nickname for life: “Blocking Sled”

by Raider Red on Feb 28, 2008 3:16 PM EST reply actions

proud day for you and your family Gaines. It is just so out of the ordinary for a Thomas boy to lose his cool

by Corry on Feb 28, 2008 3:21 PM EST reply actions

- Yea good call, I probably wasn’t the only one who skipped over the TCU news. Leave it to the former SWC dude to pick that one over with a fine toothed comb.

by Brian on Feb 28, 2008 3:26 PM EST reply actions

38:

Laughing so unbelievably hard.

41:

CG???

by Tater Salad on Feb 28, 2008 3:30 PM EST reply actions

Tater salad it is me

by Corry on Feb 28, 2008 3:32 PM EST reply actions

SEC Foreplay

by Dr. Cruz on Feb 28, 2008 4:03 PM EST reply actions

Top Secret – criminally under-rated; the clip in the “binocular and periscope” montage is as close at that film is ever getting to Oscar glory, alas.

by DC Trojan on Feb 28, 2008 4:20 PM EST reply actions

I spend all goddamned day reading comments about the fight video I can’t see due to a YouTube blocker, only to get home to see it’s been changed. FUCK!

by Allahver Fist on Feb 28, 2008 6:27 PM EST reply actions