POLL OF THE WEEK: SUGGESTIVE OFFENSES

by Orson on Feb 26, 2008 10:16 AM EST

Our poll question of the week is: which offense has the most suggestive name? As in, "sexually suggestive" name. The nominees are:

--The Spread Option"
--"The Wishbone"
--"Pro-style"
--"The Run 'n Shoot"
--"The Cock 'n Fire"
--"The Flexbone"

If you have any other nominations, please let us know and we will consider adding them. Don't try to add in Don Coryell's innovative "Thundercock" sets or John Mackovic's "Donghorn Stampede" formations, either, because they did not exist. Cast your vote in the sidebar to your right over there.

In the meantime, we demand that EA--when not gobbling up innovative video game studios producing some of the last remaining innovative sports games around--change the racist terminology in their games at once!

That's racist!

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Comments

Auburn is running the “Spread Eagle”

by NewAZTiger on Feb 26, 2008 10:21 AM EST reply actions

The “triple option” sounds French.

by 89Tiger on Feb 26, 2008 10:23 AM EST reply actions

When I was in HS, we had a short yardage/ goal line formation called “Pooh Bear”

by PW on Feb 26, 2008 10:25 AM EST reply actions

I will cast my vote for anything “double tight”

by gopherdroppings on Feb 26, 2008 10:25 AM EST reply actions

I always liked “Student Body Left” and “Student Body Right”, but those are plays, not base formations.

by crimson daddy on Feb 26, 2008 10:26 AM EST reply actions

Hands down The Cock n Fire. No contest.

by Stockman on Feb 26, 2008 10:30 AM EST reply actions

How about “HB Blast”?

by haybeav on Feb 26, 2008 10:30 AM EST reply actions

Not an offense, but the Arizona “Desert Swarm” defense sounds like an STD one might pick up during active duty in Iraq.

by Chips O'Toole on Feb 26, 2008 10:31 AM EST reply actions

You forgot the Notre Dame Box.

by sonofsamford on Feb 26, 2008 10:33 AM EST reply actions

Until Oregon State starts running the Beaver Spread, Cock ’n Fire is the hands down winner.

by Biggus Rickus on Feb 26, 2008 10:38 AM EST reply actions

BYU would like you to consider their missionary position.

by Eirishis on Feb 26, 2008 10:40 AM EST reply actions

You are required to add Jay Paterno’s “Spread HD” offense….

by The Big 11th Blog on Feb 26, 2008 10:43 AM EST reply actions

I personally like the Arkie QB draw:

Dick sneak up the middle.

by ThreenOut on Feb 26, 2008 10:45 AM EST reply actions

I can’t wait until we get to defenses. I pre-emptively nominate “8 in the box” for Champion.

by Brian on Feb 26, 2008 10:46 AM EST reply actions

If it’s any of the women I’ve been with, the “Statue of Liberty” is more than apt.

by Ground0EastLansing on Feb 26, 2008 10:51 AM EST reply actions

no one is considering the "spread and shred’?

If not, I’m with most everyone… cock n’ fire… priceless.

by dabearbus on Feb 26, 2008 10:54 AM EST reply actions

Cock-n-Fire…because for half the year, it’s impotent.

by robert on Feb 26, 2008 10:55 AM EST reply actions

For certain times each month, there’s Alabama’s “Crimson Option”. Similarly, Rutgers sometimes has to take the “Scarlet Option”.

N.D.’s “Irish Box” (what every young laddie is looking for)

Before roofies there was “Boilermaker Style”.

Defensively, Minnesota might employ the “Gopher Gap”

by J.J. on Feb 26, 2008 11:00 AM EST reply actions

At Georgia Tech, Paul Johnson will be implementing the Wishbone Triple Flex Offense…………….the WTF!! O

by NextTimeWearGold on Feb 26, 2008 11:01 AM EST reply actions

Im sorely disappointed that the “Inside Trout” didn’t make the list.

by Cincy on Feb 26, 2008 11:02 AM EST reply actions

I’m surprised there’s been no mention of the “Wildcat,” or when it gets close to closing time, the “Wildhog.”

Of course, if you’ve been drinking that much it probably just devolves into the Veer before the game’s over.

by JC on Feb 26, 2008 11:07 AM EST reply actions

Yale’s “flying wedge” was so dangerous it was outlawed back in the 1910’s, paving the way for modern football with 7 men on the line of scrimage.

I’m thinking anything called the “flying wedge” in the bedroom is similarly outlawed in most central plains states. Without the wedge, Oklahoma, Texas, and Nebraska were forced to innovate such great offenses at the: “split T”, the aforementioned “wishbone” and “flexbone”, and…. when you’re in a hurry, the “speed option”.

by Cincy on Feb 26, 2008 11:20 AM EST reply actions

I don’t know if it was a formal part of the 07 Notre Dame playbook, but it sure looked like they were running a Pump and Dump – like a Cleveland Steamer for lonely wankers.

by DC Trojan on Feb 26, 2008 11:21 AM EST reply actions

I agree with #20. Where’s the Inside Trout?

by Slacker on Feb 26, 2008 11:34 AM EST reply actions

I know it doesn’t count, but we had a great trick play in High School where I (center) snapped the ball between the quarterback’s legs to the fullback, called “The Backdoor Sneak”…

An assistant coach implemented “The Shocker” (guess the sign for this play), but when the head coach found out the double meaning he pulled it from the book.

by Excuse me Stewardess, but I speak jive on Feb 26, 2008 11:54 AM EST reply actions

Cock-n-fire easily takes the shortest leap for a dirty mind.

by TIGERinATL on Feb 26, 2008 11:54 AM EST reply actions

The Cock and Fire.

And on defense, it’s whenever a sportscaster says “Boy, they sure got good penetration that time!”

I never understand how they can say it with a straight face.

by Mr. Flibble on Feb 26, 2008 12:18 PM EST reply actions

How about the “hurry-up”?

by somedawg on Feb 26, 2008 12:59 PM EST reply actions

I still secretly wish for an annual South Carolina/Oregon St. tilt.

Cocks vs. Beavers…. it would never get old.

by Cincy on Feb 26, 2008 1:03 PM EST reply actions

You should have used the .gif of the Asian guy saying “That’s waisis!”

by TLH Gator on Feb 26, 2008 1:09 PM EST reply actions

Uber religious Ken Hatfield will be sending you straight to H E double hockey sticks for daring to derive any but the most pure of intentions for his Flexbone offense.

Me? I say fuck him. That offense sucked.

by drogue on Feb 26, 2008 1:12 PM EST reply actions