CURIOUS INDEX, 2/8/08

by Orson on Feb 8, 2008 9:34 AM EST

The voting for the CFBAs has been postponed until Monday to get the voting widget prepared. Plus traffic is heaviest on Mondays anyway, since the dedicated United States workforce typically enters the work week at a full stumble rather than a sprint.

Mike Stoops apologizes for calling Arizona State "a junior college." Booooooooooo! Rivalry never apologizes! Then again, Mike Stoops has lost three straight to Arizona State, so rivalry may be a strong word at this point. (Remember: for the ADD-stricken, two's a trend, three's a fact.) The verbiage:

"Yesterday in my annual signing day news conference I regretfully made some comments about sister institution Arizona State University," Stoops said in a statement. "These remarks were dutifully reported by the media, and not necessarily taken out of context -- which was within some of my heartfelt observations about the recruiting process and what it entails for individuals and college football programs. But it was a personal mistake and one for which I apologize."

Again: booooooo!!! Though calling them a "sister" institution could be interpreted as a proper use of the terminology and a dig at the same time, if you're just looking for a dig somewhere in there.

Dienhart says Florida co-DC Greg Mattison is gone, gone, gone. The storyline is that Mattison, one half of the defensive coordinator spot at Florida along with Charlie Strong, wants to bank a few years primo NFL salary before retiring. Mattison's a very good recruiter, and that's a loss, and also served as a good mentor of defensive linemen, his specialty. It's leaving a hole, and the timing blows goats. If only the decision had been made earlier, we could have had a shot at...you know.

Ah, but for the timing.

Recruits receiving fake letters telling them Ohio State was withdrawing their scholarship offers?

"I looked at them like, 'What the heck? This is fake,' " Mobley said last night. "There were all these misspellings, and you couldn't even read the signature, it was like, 'Jim, scribble-scribble.' ..."I sure hope the person who did it wasn't 30 years old or something, because it's embarrassing," he said.

No, Brian's not 30, and he wouldn't misspell anything, either. so take him off your suspect list.

Number one, twenty-four. Whatever, dude. Scout analyst Miller Safrit says that when it comes to recruiting rankings, he's pretty Ecclesiastes-ish about the whole thing. "All is vanity! Vanity!"

"For us, the difference isn't very significant," said Scout's Miller Safrit. "When you're combining mathematical formula with opinion, it's not really something where you can say, 'We are better than you.' We could tweak the rankings tomorrow and end up with Southern Miss ahead if we wanted."

That may be, outside of references to Armageddon and Genesis, the only other Biblical reference we're comfortable throwing out, since we spent most of our CCD time looking up dire, Old Testament God-threats like "YOUR CHILDREN WILL BE EATEN" and drawing modern stores and businesses into the maps of Jerusalem in the back. Besides that, if it wasn't mentioned in a Faulkner book or other piece of modern lit, we won't recognize it.

(Oh, and Song of Solomon, but only because it will totally get you laid with Bible literate bookish types. "The joints of thy thighs are like jewels?" Works every time.

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Comments

I rilly thot that wood work.

by Ann Arbor 4th Grader Mikey Sills on Feb 8, 2008 9:45 AM EST reply actions

So if two’s a trend and three’s a fact, what does that say about Alabama for losing 6 in a row to Auburn and 5 in a row to LSU?

Mississippi State could become the truth this coming season too…

by Billy in Baton Rouge on Feb 8, 2008 9:46 AM EST reply actions

I dunno…. the earth swallowing children and all was kinda cool, but i was always more partial to the “twins of a gazelle which feed among the lilies” (or was that twin Giselles ).

http://gossipgalore.files.wordpress.com/2007/05/giselle_bundchen-gisele-says-good-bye-to-victoria-may-1-2007.jpg

by Berdingo on Feb 8, 2008 9:48 AM EST reply actions

Timeline:
Tuesday PM: Omar Hunter receives call from a rival coach saying Mattison is leaving.

Wednesday 8-9 AM: OH calls Urban and asks, says he is concerned, and delays signing LOI. Urban reassures him saying Mattison is not accepting offer.

Wednesday 11 AM: OH signs LOI to Florida.

Wednesday afternoon: Mattison agrees to offer from Baltimore Ravens.

Urban is slick, man.

by Andy on Feb 8, 2008 9:49 AM EST reply actions

Other adjetives describing Meyer besides “slick” come to mind, Andy.

by Aerobab on Feb 8, 2008 9:53 AM EST reply actions

Anyone catch Coach O on the Scout show NLOI Day? He was there with Lemming and one other host. What a train wreck. He even asked Saban a question, and Saban had to ask him to repeat it.

by Geaux Irish on Feb 8, 2008 9:56 AM EST reply actions

You know mike wasn’t going to appologize unless he was allowed to call them “sister”…I read in the local paper the prepared apology actually refered to ASU as “that little bitch in state school who always steals my hair ties” but, you know, everything has to be PC now.

http://thebigeleventh.blogspot.com/

by big 11th blog on Feb 8, 2008 9:58 AM EST reply actions

yawyawyaw, Urban Meyer.

OS, what would happen in your universe if Coach was actually employed by the Universty of Florida in some capacity as a football coach?

by Hang up & Listen on Feb 8, 2008 9:59 AM EST reply actions

What? After the time Satan spent at LSD he can’t speak Coonass? He just doesn’t have time for that shit, I guess.

But, Lemming should have known better and had voice recognition software installed before scheduling The Orgeron.

by yoyofutbawl on Feb 8, 2008 10:09 AM EST reply actions

I took a class in Columbia (SC, not the cocaine-fueled country) that covered the entire Book of Revelation over the course of a semester. Different societies, relegions and artists interpretations of it.
That shit will blow your mind.

by GamecockTony on Feb 8, 2008 10:10 AM EST reply actions

/start threadjack

The Rooney Rule will now apply to college HC searches:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/02/07/AR2008020704232.html

end threadjack/

by maskedavenger on Feb 8, 2008 10:14 AM EST reply actions

Motion before the council:

Cheaty McSweatervest’s new DJ name is “Jim Scribble-scribble”

by JC on Feb 8, 2008 10:25 AM EST reply actions

Christ, it’s getting so a white man can’t oppress nobody these day. Where have you gone Bull Connor?

Too racist?

by Biggus Rickus on Feb 8, 2008 10:27 AM EST reply actions

a) this blog never would have been able to handle the o wearing blue and orange. its like the guy who wins the lottery and pisses it away in month and turns to meth.

b) i’m a saints fan, so stop coveting my new d line coach.

by gerry dorsey on Feb 8, 2008 10:32 AM EST reply actions

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s bat-shit insane coach?

by Biggus Rickus on Feb 8, 2008 10:38 AM EST reply actions

Song of Solomons = Softcore Bible porn

Christianity should be marketing the hell out of that book. The pre-pubescent numbers would be through the roof, I tells ya.

by NoleinTexas on Feb 8, 2008 10:39 AM EST reply actions

Sorry, but if you’re using the Bible to get laid, your trying to hard. Unless your taking a class on the subject and you are using “study” time.

by Charlestownecock on Feb 8, 2008 10:41 AM EST reply actions

“Dienhart says…”

Hello Football Fans,

I would like to invite each of you to Arkansas for the LSU game this year.

I will be coaching both teams.

Regards,
Tom Tuberville

by Tommy Tuberville on Feb 8, 2008 10:45 AM EST reply actions

“Softcore Bible Porn”

Do you think the Baptists discussed this at their convention last week – I mean after the heavy debate on converting Jews?

by Picture Me Rollin on Feb 8, 2008 10:50 AM EST reply actions

In Solomon’s Song I had real problems with the “…your teeth are like the sheeps in the field…” or some such, although I can’t argue with the effect…that and the old Billy Joel song “…catholic girls start much too late…”, throw in song of solomon and “Only the good die young” and watch those competitive juices begin to crank up for you in rapid fashion…religion and love…what a concept! Well it worked most of the time anyway…

by sb on Feb 8, 2008 10:54 AM EST reply actions

I swear to Allah that I had nothing to do with the lettter to Mobley.

W~i~~S~~~dR~c~~~~r

by WhiteSpeedReceiver on Feb 8, 2008 11:16 AM EST reply actions

I, for one, am shocked that Meyer would be accused of orchestrating such a move to ensure he did not lose any recruits, besides the ones that Michigan and whomever poached, via Mattison leaving.

The timing was obviously coincidental.

Is Tebow excited about playing as a Will this upcoming year?

by Coop on Feb 8, 2008 12:04 PM EST reply actions

Coop, Coop, Coop…please understand, Tebow is looking forward to playing as a Will, as a DT as an Ol, as a wr, rb, db and sometimes as a qb…the man just wants to play football. The real ND (not the new and improved fatboy version) had the four horsemen…well the Gators have the four horse MAN. Yes, there are genetic upgrades involved.

by sb on Feb 8, 2008 3:51 PM EST reply actions

LSU opens against App State August 30.

by Tricky Dick on Feb 8, 2008 3:58 PM EST reply actions

The joints of thy thighs are like jewels…

Thy bunda is rotunda….

Come by and seeth me next afternoonda….

Orson

by hunglikehussain on Feb 8, 2008 6:22 PM EST reply actions

Sorry… “a pig’s a pig.” Meyer might have f’d up the Hunter situation, maybe not. No question that his trickbag is deep and he requires heavy sedatives. scumbag move (repeat)

by RyderCup on Feb 8, 2008 11:02 PM EST reply actions

Im partial to the “your breast are like Gazelles boucing thru the lillies and off your tongue rolls milk and honey”
or some shit, damn Solomon and his 400 concubines, I’d have some kinky songs too

by Mr Pelican Pants on Feb 9, 2008 1:18 AM EST reply actions