MALLETT APPEALS TRANSFER PENALTY

by Orson on Feb 6, 2008 12:05 PM EST

I'm so hood: Mallett

You know what I was thinking?

I'm never gonna pay taxes. Never, man. Look at Wesley Snipes. Blade made like a zillion dollars, didn't even file a tax return for years, and then when the IRS came after him beat the rap like he was back in Passenger 57. Hell yes, I'm betting on the black--as in Ryan Mallett, professional athlete, being in the black when he doesn't have to pay all those taxes to the asshole IRS. That's totally what I'm gonna do.

You know what else? I'm parking in that handicapped space. Like the crippled don't need exercise, too? Have you been to a casino lately? Cripples are fat, dude. They need some PT, if all the fatties I saw rolling in and out of the Golden Nugget are any indication of cripple buffness levels.

I'm also not using my turn signal. You know what turn signals are? They're Total Pussy Alarm Indicators, as in "Hey, total pussy coming through?" That's why you have brakes, man: to let awesome drivers like me over. Otherwise, you might as well drive blindfolded, right? Idiots.

Oh, and that whole "wait a year before you play after a transfer" bullshit? Yeah, up your ass with that. I mean, I'm in Arkansas now. That's not even in the same country at Michigan, because Michigan is in Canada. Everyone knows that.

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Comments

Homeboy just wants to play while Petrino’s still coaching there. For that reason alone it should be a slam dunk.

by Allahver Fist on Feb 6, 2008 12:15 PM EST reply actions

Parking in the handicapped spaces?

Ryan Mallett and Cade McNown need to stop hanging out.

by CAJason80 on Feb 6, 2008 12:16 PM EST reply actions

As a native Arkansan who went to college in Michigan, I agree with Mr. Mallett’s sentiment that Michigan is, in fact, Canada.

However, as a Razorback fan, I appreciate the effort to get the year off waived but I also realize it would set a precedent that could bite a lot of folks in the ass in the future.

by Jerkwheat on Feb 6, 2008 12:18 PM EST reply actions

I wonder if they’ll take into account the fact that the new Michigan coach said on ESPN he didn’t want Mallett’s ass there anymore… nah.

by Adam on Feb 6, 2008 12:27 PM EST reply actions

Ryan Mallett is an asshat

by Michigan Gator on Feb 6, 2008 12:27 PM EST reply actions

wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. Canada is a part of Michigan, not the other way around. In fact, it’s a suburb of Detroit.

Duh.

by Anon on Feb 6, 2008 12:28 PM EST reply actions

R-Kansas is technically a 4th world country so I can understand el Douche’s request.

by Your Mom Loves LSU on Feb 6, 2008 12:58 PM EST reply actions

this is one of the best posts i’ve read in a long time. awesome.

http://thebigeleventh.blogspot.com/

by big 11th blog on Feb 6, 2008 1:42 PM EST reply actions

Let’s face it. The only reason Arkansas is pushing this is because they have Dick at QB.

by Jthomas666 on Feb 6, 2008 3:10 PM EST reply actions

And Dick lost both his Nutts, making him impotent.

by yoyofutbawl on Feb 6, 2008 3:34 PM EST reply actions

http://threenout.blogspot.com/2008/02/in-middle-of-all-recruiting-news.html

I’m shameless self hoing. What can I say?

by ThreenOut on Feb 6, 2008 3:43 PM EST reply actions

Not that it matters, but I feel for the kid. You think you are going to a school known for classic drop back pocket quarterbacks and then all of a sudden you are trapped on a team that uses a wideout at your position. I feel his pain but he is going to have to sit like everyone else.

by Dash on Feb 6, 2008 5:02 PM EST reply actions

See a video of recruit Justin Feagin from South Florida

http://www.palmbeachpost.com/news/mplayer/pbpost sports/61775

by UMSofla on Feb 6, 2008 9:26 PM EST reply actions

Dash, did you watch Henne in the Capital One Bowl? Best game of his career, from a passing-based spread the whole game. And he’s less mobile than Mallett.

by Noah on Feb 7, 2008 5:24 AM EST reply actions

Well said Noah – Mallett sallied out. He could have put up excellent numbers out of a shotgun read spread.

Did RR chase him out the door for a shot at Pryor?

From Mallett’s quotes after he left it does not sound like it, it was more like – he says he can adapt the offense for me, but I don’t believe him because its a OMG SPREAD and Pat White is not me.

Mallett wanted to leave Michigan the second he walked on campus, and this was a pretext.

If the NCAA lets him have another year it will basically a Terrell Owens show of free agents every year when a new coach comes in.

Mallett had to know that Lloyd was not long for the coaching world, but Lloyd may have convinced him that DeBord or Loeffler would be the next coach. Okay, can undersand how the ninja offense might have taken him by surprise, but I think Mallett will regret it after watching Threet have success in the system next year. Get the ball to fast guys in space and let them pad your passing stats. Mallett is ten times the talent Shaun King is. I have very little sympathy for the guy.

by jlichty on Feb 7, 2008 11:58 AM EST reply actions