The SEC is the speediest conference because all the slow mothers in the South abort their babies.

Awww mannn!!!!!!! He got that published? The same journal turned down my mathematical analysis of recruiting. Here, I’ll give you the abstract:

X + Y + 300Z = RL (recruit likelihood)

where X = campus location

Y = rooting interest of recruit

Z = miscellaneous. This includes, but is not limited to money, girls he meets at the campus visits, text messages from coaches, money, cool nods from the staff assistant coaches during his pre-contact period, bowl success, money, ability to major in sports management/general studies/criminal justice, money, size of athlete tutoring center, size of weight room, size of stadium, money, quality of dining hall, ability to sell back books at the end of semester, whether books are necessary in the first place, money, number of luxury boxes in the stadium, quality of fake radio broadcast with recruit scoring the winning touchdown, and money.

I’m currently working on a cross-validation study. Regardless, this formula, like all other products of genius will only be appreciated years in the future.

Mangino based his college choice on proximity of the athletic dorm to the nearest Burger King.

Allahver Fist-

Interesting theory, but unlikely; they’d need to be able to run to a blue state to access an abortion provider.

I thought “300Z” referred to the likelihood that a booster would give the kid a sports car.

Not that the Devil Children are likely to be athletic recruits, but early returns suggest that distance from home is likely to be a critical factor in their college choice.

The Economist is also the holy grail for foreign freelance reporters. get that string and you are set, baby.

It’s one of the reasons we can’t believe Omar Hunter’s going to Florida

This will now be the “insider source” on thousands of recruiting message boards, creating another feeding frenzy. Nice job!

Re #6: Until you get busted for plagiarizing a Ugandan newspaper. (See the Economist’s corrections from a few weeks back.)

Ah The Economist – magazine of choice to read in public places if you want to attract a more discriminating gold-digger type.

I’m pretty sure that somewhere the answer to solving recruit decision making lies in bits of riddle buried in songs on the albums, Whisper Tames the Lion and Death Row’s Greatest Hits.

TCOAN, do you really want to go toe-to-toe with the 1995 St. Johns County High School District Junior Achievement Economics Champion? Those tightwad fuckers at Nease High (that’s Tebow’s Nease, motherfuckers) wouldn’t fund a trip to State, which is why I’m currently not getting my toes sucked at Wharton these days.

Please address me as Dr. Professor Fist.

Not really, Dr. Fist, though a debate between a frustrated Econ Champion and a former Latin club historian/2-time Academic Team MVP would be fascinating, I’m sure. ;)

Due to the Fulmer Cup popularity, I’m sure these guys will be updating their formula to incorporate “my hosts got busted for pot on my recruiting visit and I didn’t”..remains to be seen whether it’s a positive or a negative in the formula.

My high school did not offer Latin, and I am still angry about it.

Obsolete and lost language, my white ass.

Where does English come from?

As a Domer, then, I have to ask: how does ND have the kind of success recruiting that Weis has had for the last two years, and that Holtz enjoyed previously? I’m assuming here that ND is about as corrupt as any other given college that’s competing for the recruits, and the facilities are about as nice, maybe slightly worse than others. (Except Oregon. We can’t hold a candle to Oregon. Holy shit they have a sick locker room.)

I mean, let’s go through this list:

Whether the athlete made an ?official visit? to a specific college: Most of the recruits did this.

Whether the school is in a BCS conference: No

The distance from the high school athlete?s hometown to a specific school: Generally pretty far, given the remote northern Indiana location.
          
Whether the recruit is in the same state as a specific school: Usually not.

The final AP Ranking of a specific school in the previous year of competition: Unranked
            
The number of conference titles a school has recorded in recent years: None

Whether the school is currently under a ?bowl ban? for violating NCAA rules: No
                    
The current number of scholarship reductions a school faces for violating NCAA rules: None
             
The size of the team?s stadium (measured in terms of seating capacity): Average

Whether the school has an on-campus stadium: Yes
                       
The current age of the team?s stadium: Fairly old

On the whole, ND doesn’t seem to hold up very well. So what’s the explanation?

#14
The only Latin I know, I learnt from “Tombstone” via
Doc Holliday

This former 4th grade elementary school geography winner would like to point that he has been known to read The Economist on occasion (the occasion when we get it for free or are really, really bored in an airport) and that he totally got hosed by the refs in the 6th grade middle school geography bee.

#15
Its the Holy Grail of colleges for Catholic kids….and there are a shitload of Catholic kids running around since Catholics have no birth control, especially the Irish kind…..and you get to meet up with other Catholic school girls, get naked, then go to confession the next day and start all over with another chick. At least thats what Donnie McDougal and his 5 brothers told me before going to ND……

#18
Trust me, I’m well aware of the Irish phenomenon…I’m working on my 14th year of Catholic education right now. But that still doesn’t explain the recruiting.

And also, That Dog thinks that all black people are Catholic but dont know it, they just dont go to confession as much and sing louder during Mass

Re #14: Where does English come from?

http://www.cam.ac.uk/admissions/undergraduate/courses/asnc/index.html

“On the whole, ND doesn’t seem to hold up very well. So what’s the explanation?”

Um, that sweet-ass ethanol plant smell?

It’s either that or Macri’s. I’m stumped.

Proximity + School standing + Cadillac = Committed Recruit!

I think that used to be the equation.

“Also, those schools that are members of conferences affiliated with the Bowl Championship Series (BCS) are found to have a significant recruiting advantage compared to other institutions.”

Whaaa? The guy who presented the trophy at the BCS title game told me that all 11 1-A conferences were part of the BCS. You mean… You mean to tell me that some of us AREN’T part of the BCS? That there’s some sort of inequality there? Well, this is shocking…

1. - Recruiting rankings are made by recruiting magazines to sell….magazines. ND will always be in the top 10 because the fanbase is large enough and stupid enough to believe recruiting rankings.

Please understand most people with economics degrees like me look at something like Freakonomics and laugh and say: “Wow what an asshole, he made a book out of doing simple linear regressions and then assuming causality out of correlation.” AKA: he threw some numbers into excel and wrote a book about it – which is as lame as Glen Dorsey after a particularly nasty chop block.

Well, as someone that was once offered $5 a question in school by his econ professor to come up with questions for a textbook on econmics he was co-authoring, I still say it has a shitload to do with how much weed, ass, coin, and ride a recruit thinks he can get on his way to the NFL.

Oh come on now Brian, he may have used SPSS!

Why are recruits going to ND? It seems there’s a sizable chunk of Top 150 players that are just dying to be featured on NBC’s “Hey our production values are straight out of the 80s, early 90s” broadcast 7-8 times a year.

“Every game you play looks like ESPN Classic” says Frontbutt Charlie.

Explain ND’s ranking in 04/05 then 25. here they are:

Class 2005 Rankings
1. Southern California, 2. Florida State, 3. Tennessee, 4. Oklahoma, 5. Nebraska, Tie 5. Michigan, 7. Iowa, 8. Miami-Florida, 9. Georgia, 10. California, 11. Texas A&M, 12. Ohio State, 13. Auburn, 14. Florida, 15. Virginia Tech, 16. Texas, 17. Alabama, 18. Virginia, 19. Arizona, 20. LSU, 21. South Carolina, 22. Clemson, 23. Maryland, 24. North Carolina State, 25. Penn State, Tie 25. Arkansas, Tie 25. Purdue, Tie 25. UCLA.

Class 2004 rankings
1. Southern California, 2. LSU, 3. Florida State, 4. Miami-Florida, 5. Michigan, 6. Oklahoma, 7. Georgia, 8. Florida, 9. Ohio State, 10. Texas, Tie 10. Tennessee, 12. Texas A&M, 13. Oregon, 14. Penn State, 15. Michigan State, 16. Alabama, 17. Maryland, 18. Washington, 19. California, 20. Purdue, 21. Missouri, 22. Washington State, 23. Kansas State, 24. Auburn, 25. Boston College

Wow. They got paid money for that study???? I should have gone into economics instead of web/graphic design.

1. Mine did. I was lousy at Spanish (hate the language, my state (Texas) being over run with it…I’m a badddd liberal), but loved Latin. Great stories and you only had to translate, no pronunciation. Latin is extremely helpful when you are in the art museums and you need to read the writing on all the old silver. Also, I easily impressed my friends at UT because I could read and translate the words on the buildings around campus. Some of my friends played football at UT so it didn’t take much to impress them. (‘Hope they don’t read this blog…) The rest of us actually got in because we were in the top 10% of our class at competitive high schools and not because we could run the 40 in 4.5, bench press 350, etc.

Until you get busted for plagiarizing a Ugandan newspaper. (See the Economist’s corrections from a few weeks back.)

this, i hate to inform you, is the way foreign journalism is done.

1. My ex-wife was going to take Latin in high school as an independant study, but the teacher got busted for murdering another teacher and her kids. And the principal got taken down for armed robbery of a Sears.

It was apparently quite a school.

#26, please understand, Mr. Levitt thinks about people like you, laughs, then returns to counting his money.

TCOAN:

It’s all about the STATA9. Or R.

Brian @26. I do not think Levitt put that much effort in his analysis. In reading his book, I am pretty sure he inserted his hand into his large intestine via the anus opening, and gently tugged. His leaps of logic in the conclusions are wider than the Grand Canyon.

We’ve all had a good laugh over Freakonomics and the people who quote it.

Robert and TCOAN: As a good, pompous PhD jackass, I must point out that SPSS and R are statistical software packages. And, as everyone knows, real researchers use SAS.. :)

Check out “Super Crunchers” by Ian Ayres, a buddy of the guy who wrote “Freakanomics”. It’s a good discussion of the regression movement.

Took Latin in high school as a freshman and was knee deep in hot senior girls for the whole year.