THE TEN MOMENTS OF PURE MALICIOUS FATE, 2007: BRUINS BLOCKED

by Orson on Jan 10, 2008 12:57 PM EST

We're counting down the most malicious strikes of evil fate of 2007. Do you have a fever? Man, that could be anything.

It's a beautiful day DAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY...and the cd starts skipping wildly when UCLA, playing inspired comeback football against BYU with an interim coach and nothing to lose, drives down the field for a sure game-winning field goal that soars off the gilded toe of UCLA's kicker and into the...hands of a huge Samoan, Eathyn Manumaleuna.

The block ended the comeback, preserved a 17-16 win for BYU, and ruined the script. Now we won't be able to sell it for anything! WHAT THE HELL DID I GET MY FUCKING M.F.A. FOR ANYWAY, HUH! YOU'VE RUINED EVERYTHING!

To be continued, because they get much, much worse. Do you ever worry about how many unsecured nuclear weapons there are in this world? Because you should.

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Special Ed Orgeron + 4th down against Miss State = much, much worse.

by Allahver Fist on Jan 10, 2008 1:03 PM EST reply actions

the last thing anyone wants is to be taunted by 1000 mormons.

by gerry dorsey on Jan 10, 2008 1:09 PM EST reply actions

So anyways….

by Bobby Decatur on Jan 10, 2008 1:20 PM EST reply actions

- they don’t taunt but in exchange for getting beat you have to let them pitch to you for at least 15 minutes.

by Signal to Noise on Jan 10, 2008 1:28 PM EST reply actions

This annoyed me. I actually watched the whole 2nd half with nothing better to do and I grew to loathe BYU. All the announcers kept saying is how the team is made up of 24 year olds and they’re married. How is that fair? Fuck Mormons.

by Edsall is God on Jan 10, 2008 1:31 PM EST reply actions

I think rogue black holes are a much larger threat than silly nuclear weapons:

http://www.space.com/scienceastronomy/080109-aas-rogue-black-holes.html

by Gator03 on Jan 10, 2008 1:53 PM EST reply actions

Of course that ending delighted a bunch of doofus UCLA Bruin “fans” who were rooting against their own team out of fear they would end up with another black coach.

by oc phil on Jan 10, 2008 3:40 PM EST reply actions