THE TEN MOMENTS OF PURE MALICIOUS FATE, 2007: BRUINS BLOCKED
We’re counting down the most malicious strikes of evil fate of 2007. Do you have a fever? Man, that could be anything.
It’s a beautiful day DAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY…and the cd starts skipping wildly when UCLA, playing inspired comeback football against BYU with an interim coach and nothing to lose, drives down the field for a sure game-winning field goal that soars off the gilded toe of UCLA’s kicker and into the…hands of a huge Samoan, Eathyn Manumaleuna.
The block ended the comeback, preserved a 17-16 win for BYU, and ruined the script. Now we won’t be able to sell it for anything! WHAT THE HELL DID I GET MY FUCKING M.F.A. FOR ANYWAY, HUH! YOU’VE RUINED EVERYTHING!
To be continued, because they get much, much worse. Do you ever worry about how many unsecured nuclear weapons there are in this world? Because you should.
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1
Special Ed Orgeron + 4th down against Miss State = much, much worse.
Comment by Allahver Fist — January 10, 2008 @ 1:03 pm
2
the last thing anyone wants is to be taunted by 1000 mormons.
Comment by gerry dorsey — January 10, 2008 @ 1:09 pm
3
So anyways….
Comment by Bobby Decatur — January 10, 2008 @ 1:20 pm
4
#2 - they don’t taunt but in exchange for getting beat you have to let them pitch to you for at least 15 minutes.
Comment by Signal to Noise — January 10, 2008 @ 1:28 pm
5
This annoyed me. I actually watched the whole 2nd half with nothing better to do and I grew to loathe BYU. All the announcers kept saying is how the team is made up of 24 year olds and they’re married. How is that fair? Fuck Mormons.
Comment by Edsall is God — January 10, 2008 @ 1:31 pm
6
I think rogue black holes are a much larger threat than silly nuclear weapons:
http://www.space.com/scienceastronomy/080109-aas-rogue-black-holes.html
Comment by Gator03 — January 10, 2008 @ 1:53 pm
7
Of course that ending delighted a bunch of doofus UCLA Bruin “fans” who were rooting against their own team out of fear they would end up with another black coach.
Comment by oc phil — January 10, 2008 @ 3:40 pm
8
Bruce Davis is still in John David Booty’s head.
Comment by DC Trojan — January 11, 2008 @ 5:02 pm