XMAS TUNES YULE HATE: SILENT NIGHT

Merry Christmas, Mutherfuckers!

Even the double dose of Maiden does not excuse this.

We’re not going anywhere this Christmas without a Santa Hat with our name on it.

"Christmas music for the shallow secular urban hipster . . . "

You rang?

There is a Christmas CD I’ve been listening to for the last few weeks. It’s by Travis Matte, a popular south Louisiana zydeco artist. His song list includes the following:

The Night that Me and Santa Claus Got Drunk
Santa Claus Don’t Wear No Draws
Santa Got a Hangover
Santa Stole My Christmas Cookie

It’s pure GOLD, Jerry.

Listen here. You’ll thank me.

http://cdbaby.com/cd/travismatteatzk3

What is that crap in their hair? Someone tell them about dandruff shampoo.

Wait, what am I talking about? This is Winger. They have all sorts of haircare product knowledge at their disposal.

Thanks Orson for proving that YouTube is not always good. Sometimes it serves as a repository for the all of the crap that should have been long forgotten.

I’m gonna go back and watch the Radiohead clip just to purge myself of this.

RCR,

Do they play on KBON?. I’ll have to check it out if i get down to Crowley to visit the wife’s family this Crristmas.

I’m running low on Don’s boudin & Mellow Joy, so a trip might be in order.

kip winger always seemed pretty fucking fruity to me. that being said i bet he laid more pipe between ’88 and ’92 than most of us can imagine laying in a lifetime.

rcr,

i overlooked your post the first time. with the execption of his lsu cocksucking, i love me some travis matte. and yes reb pup, you can hear some matte on kbon.

Orson,

Fuck you.

Love,
EVERYONE

My favorite part of Metallica’s “Year and a Half In the Life of…” DVD is when James is in the studio throwing darts at a picture of Kip Winger. Fuck, I mean, he’s named KIP. Who the fuck gets named Kip?

Orson, you must have caught a Truckadelic show at the Star Bar at least once, right? Their version of “Sorriest Christmas” by the late, great Gregory Dean Smalley is my all-time favorite Christmas song. Pure, white-trash gold.

Well played Swindle, well played. Nothing puts me in the Christmas spirit like a drummer wearing a Santa hat and a shirt with sleeves cut off.

Jesus Christ…my ears are pissed off and kicking the shit out of my brain for making them suffer through that. Orson, thanks for the headache Excedrin won’t be able to tackle. I think I would have rather heard Nelson or even Bad English butcher Silent Night.
That brings me to another question…Did Conway Twitty ever do a Christmas album, because I would spend my life’s savings for that. (Note…my life’s savings is only about 10 duckets…what? I have what doctors like to call a little bit of a drinking problem)

Fraggle, I’m sad to say I know the answer to that, and it is an affirmative. My folks played that shit when I was growing up; once I was old enough to figure out it sucked, it became a very nice frisbee for me to use with the dog.

Gerry Dorsey @ #8-

I’ve always heard “laying pipe” as a euphemism for defecating, not sex. Your comment is still funny that way, though, just oddly personal.

@ Beast44,

Too bad it wasn’t Def Leppard.
Only one sleeve needed, then.

Dorsey – that’s always been “growing a tail” in my circle, but whatever works.

tcaon,

wow, i’ve never heard that definition. we are definitely not from the same part of the world. you’re right though…its pretty funny either way.

beast,

you are correct sir. more specifically “growing a monkey tail.”

After hearing this one wonders what 17 year old girl he was singing about in their hit. Because both her daddy and she agree that’s pretty much crappy.

Also, I’ve been sucked into the youtube vortex that is Related Videos and there’s more modern Kip Winger gold to be had.

He and Scott Stapp should do a superduo album.

“She’s only 17! 17!”

That was originally a song about the Virgin Mary and Christmas.

True story.

TCOAN-
laying the brown down = defecation
laying pipe = fornication

There of course may be regional variations. Considering the potentially very different meaning of the same phrase, its best to check your region before actual usage.

Kip may be an ass-clown, but Rod Morgenstein and Reb Beach were fucking badasses.

I’d just like to say, I made it through 2 girls, 1 cup, but I was not able to make it through that.

Winger rocks my world

I actually met Kip Winger at a 4th of July party in Denver just before his band made it big and his claim to fame was having played bass for Alice Cooper. He was actually a cool guy in person at least before he got his 15 minutes of rock stardom.

Regardless, that video is hideous.

How did Alice Cooper not murder that douchebag?

Santa has come early and taken the video down… thank you baby jesus

I think I see the source of confusion:

Laying CABLE: defecation
Laying PIPE: the wild thing