They’re going for $1,000 online, so attempting to pick up a few in a free only makes sense, no matter how high you are: BCS tickets are being given away in a lottery sponsored by the Baton Rouge restaurant Walk Ons, and somewhere between two and three thousand people showed up to claim tickets for the game, including some obvious stoners, according to the LSU Reveille.

“I said, ‘Is that really my name?’” Lawrence said. “We got here about 12 o’clock and waited in line for 35 or 40 minutes in the driving rain to sign up. I never thought we would win. We were just here to have a good time.”

Long-time fried Kevin Dowdy accompanied Lawrence and will join him in the 20-yardline, upper deck section of the Superdome on Jan. 7.

Neologism or typo? We don’t care. Long-time fried just entered the vernacular whether it was intentional or not, because it’s as good a description of being baked on the slow plan as we’ve ever heard. It might also help deal with the harsh, Spartak Moscow mob riots that will inevitably erupt when people don’t get tickets.


You have tickets to an arbitrarily arranged game between a one-loss and a two-loss team? DIE PIGGIE DIE!!!,