Show me your scruples… If you weren’t quite convinced that this whole BCS system is a giant, steaming pile of elephant dung, you will be once you get through the coaches ballots. Among my favorties:

**Lllloyd Carr - the 4 L version - voted his Wolverines 21st, a full ten spots ahead of their actual ranking. Oregon, the team Lloyd could not stay within 30 points of at home, is not on his ballot at all.

**Dennis Franchione, apparently not content to fuck one football program in the ass, sent a parting shot to Hawaii, ranking them 22nd. Hal Mumme, seeing the team he wished he had, voted the Rainbow Warriors #1.

**Tommy Bowden threw darts at his ballot. Oklahoma landed in the 10 spot, four behind… Missouri. Mkay.

**The lone moralist in college football? Mack Brown, of course. Every coach except the Longhorns’ voted their team higher than their actual finish. As noted at DC Sports Blog: “The most stark moral offenders are: Lloyd Carr (10 spots difference), Mike Bellotti (8), Chris Petersen (6), Mike Riley (5), Randy Edsall (5), Tommy Bowden (5), Mike Leach (4), Ron Zook (4) and Phillip Fulmer (4). Frank Beamer (3) didn’t quite make this cut, but he was the only coach to vote Virginia Tech No. 2, meaning he tried to put his own team in the title game and no one else did.”

**Howard Schnellenberger? Marching to his own beat. USC is ranked behind… Boise State?

Crazy Requires Charisma Hawaii coach June Jones says Tim Tebow is a “system quarterback” and his own gunslinger Colt Brennan is college football’s best player. (HT: Wiz) Lord knows this blog couldn’t survive without all the feet coaches lodge in their mouths, but I’m a firm believer that if you’re gonna take the plunge into the abyss of absurd quotes, you gotta do so with charisma. Think pirates.

June Jones?


HU-man. RO-bot.

Brian Cook suicide watch: day 13 Page 6 gossip columnist Michigan blogger Brian Cook has battled through games of footsy with both Kirk Ferentz and Les Miles. Now… Ball State’s Brady Hoke? MGoBlog suggests this is Hoke putting his own name into the Big Program Job Search channels, but Occam’s Razor suggests a far simpler, more logical explanation: Tressel!

Your uniforms match my penalty flag. Oregon State may have gotten the last laugh, but not without a valiant fight from the officials, who tried oh so hard to keep the Ducks in Saturday’s Civil War. And as Oregon State blogger Building The Dam points out, that may not have been much of a coincidence. Eugene officiating conspiracies: not going away any time soon! You gotta love it.