MMM, WHO DOESN’T LOVE PRESS CONFERENCES?
The fact we have to wait for a selection show doesn’t seem half as unusual this year as a college football fan. As strange as it’s been, Barry Alvarez could come on the screen in a Cat-in-the-Hat raver cap, technicolor-striped pants, and twirling two glow sticks while screaming “SOMEONE GAVE ME BAAAAAAD DRUGS!!!” and it would feel apropos. It’s been bad trippy time for football fans everywhere this entire season–why change now? Just put Thom Brennaman in the fat pants, dose him on some cut-rate MDMA, turn on the camera, and let the fun begin. WHO LOVES YOU? AND WHO DO YOU LOVE THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP
It feels so good when you touch my head…where’s my gum?
So while we all wait for the BCS selection show, please note that EDSBS Live, America’s Most Outstandingly Mediocre College Football Show, has been moved for one week only to Monday night on account of Peter Bean, our co-host, being exceedingly occupied this week for reasons unknown. (He’s secretly negotiating for the job of defensive coordinator of the Texas Longhorns. Let it be known that we think he’d be just as good as their current management.) It will be broadcast live tomorrow night when we’ve got BCS selections to discuss and a bit more time on our hands as a duo.
Regular programming continues apace tomorrow. For the record, we think placing the entire undefeated 2004 Auburn squad and the 12-0 1994 Penn State Nittany Lions would make as much sense as any other arrangement you choose, since the BCS is made to hand pick a pair of lions from the pride for their title game, not pull a pair a pair of random feral cats from a sack.
269 Responses to “MMM, WHO DOESN’T LOVE PRESS CONFERENCES?”
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151
AZDuck says:
And I agree with one of the posters above: if there is to be any kind of justice salvaged from this crappy bowl season, I think the AP needs to anoint the winner of the Sugar its #1, just to show that the system is well and truly broken all to hell.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:27 pm
152
AZDuck says:
ESPECIALLY IF ITS HAWAII.
They’d be unbeaten with a win over the #4 or #3 team.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:28 pm
153
Big Red says:
Check-plus to #114 for referencing the Contra and TMNT cheat code for Nintendo.
Two of my favorite games ever.
Oh yeah, the BCS sucks.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:33 pm
154
bnb614 says:
Hawaii will beat Georgia
Illinois will beat USC
Oklahoma will throttle West Virginia
Virginia Tech will throttle Kansas
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:34 pm
155
Bobby Decatur says:
My venom and vitrol isn’t for the BCS system, because as fucked as it is, playoffs wouldn’t “prove” who the best college football team is year in and year out any more than this current system does. It’s college football, and on any given day any given team, blah blah blah.
No, the poisonous disgust this time around is for the useless suits directing the Rose Bowl selection. They just turned their bulbous noses up at 99.998% of the college football consuming public and denied us all a chance at what would have been a beautiful matchup between two football teams with more speed, athleticism, and momentum than anyone else out there right now. Richt vs. Carroll…..damn, it would have been nice. Big heaving Fuck You to the Rose Bowl selection committee. May your blind lobotomized loyalty to ‘tradition’ render you obsolete.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:36 pm
156
R.D. Baker - Retired Blogger says:
Worst non-BCS matchup
The Pirate (assuming he doesn’t get hired somewhere else) vs. Al Groh in the Gator Bowl
Virginia isn’t gonna know what hit them. ARRRRR!
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:36 pm
157
finals week sucks says:
@ 135
Because being #1 makes you have a bigger target on your back. Every opponent is going to bring their A++-game, and if you can’t hack it, you don’t deserve to be there. The fact that LSU was there twice and found deficient is ridiculous.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:38 pm
158
CLTDawg says:
While I would have loved to get a shot at that natty (God Bless Marcus Howard) at least we are still going to the best (& most fun) bowl game outside of the MNC. Should have beaten SC this year, and we wouldn’t be bitchin’ right now.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:39 pm
159
AZDuck says:
Agreed regarding the Rose Bowl.
Moreover, if there was ever a conference less deserving than the Big 10 of 2 BCS bids this season, I don’t know it. The Sun Belt maybe.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:40 pm
160
sjs1959 says:
Sure, the BCS is FUBAR, always has been. The UGA have no right to cry; they can save that for when Brennan throws for 6 TDS and 550 yards against them in the Sugar Bowl.
I get so sick of these SEC crybabies who hate the Big Ten, when their ancestors made the Big Ten great by not integrating until the late 60s and early 70s. Seriously, get over it.
Next, I do agree with the commenter who said that to put LSU in the BCS title game when it’s in NOLA was to hand them the title on a silver platter. Let us all remember, however, that USC was thought to have won the MNC just by showing up in the Rose Bowl against Texas, and we all know what happened there.
SEC people, quit hating on the Big Ten; when you quit whining, maybe the rest of the USA won’t want to crush you so much.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:43 pm
161
SpartanDan says:
Bobby, you should probably be railing against the Sugar Bowl execs for that – if the Rose Bowl wanted Georgia, the Sugar could veto (as that would be the logical replacement for LSU). I think they added that rule after the Rose Bowl got screwed out of having Iowa the year of the Miami-OSU title game.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:46 pm
162
NMS says:
“SEC people, quit hating on the Big Ten; when you quit whining, maybe the rest of the USA won’t want to crush you so much.
But you don’t actually crush us..sooo consider me quaking in my shoes
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:47 pm
163
Kate says:
#143: Michigan, huh? I’m a Gator fan, so I guess we’ll be seeing your guys on January 1
Whatever the outcome of that one, at least we know we’ll probably both always hate OSU.
#149: Big PAC-10 vs. SEC match-ups = the fever dreams of college football fans everywhere. LSU/Georgia vs. USC/healthy Dixon-led Oregon for MNC would have been amazing. USC/Oregon vs. Georgia/Florida would have been amazing. Too bad we won’t ever see it.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:48 pm
164
SpartanDan says:
finals week sucks: So losing when you *don’t* have that target on your back is better than losing when you do? You’re making almost as little sense as stapler, and that’s saying something.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:48 pm
165
Brandon Lang says:
CRIS and FiveDimes both had 3.5 early. CRIS now 4.5 and FiveDimes -5.
O/U 51.5
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:51 pm
166
PW says:
Because being #1 makes you have a bigger target on your back. Every opponent is going to bring their A++-game
Wouldn’t that actually make their losses more justifiable?
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:51 pm
167
Chinese Bandit says:
Any sense of reason or logic finals weeks sucks may have had has clearly been overridden by some serious sour grapes.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:53 pm
168
bnb614 says:
I am calling that
AZDuck is the same person as NewAZTiger
We get it, you don’t like the Big 10.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:53 pm
169
Futbawl Fan says:
Let’s be honest here folks… we are all just a LITTLE bit happy that tOSU will be in the title game….
one word…..
subcommandante
the boy has to drive through Ar-kansas to get there… probably get sidetracked in TX… his tale will make this silly BCS thing all better
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:54 pm
170
AZDuck says:
Dislike Big 10, yes.
I also dislike the SEC.
As you can tell by my name, I’m a Pac 10 guy.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:55 pm
171
AZDuck says:
And you won’t hear me saying the SEC sucks, because, well, they don’t.
December 2nd, 2007 at 9:56 pm
172
stapler says:
As a UGA fan I’m madder than Walter Sobchak when he found out that he had to roll on Shabbats.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:00 pm
173
R.D. Baker - Retired Blogger says:
re: Illinois in the Rose
Actually, considering the Rose picked *before* the Fiesta due to Ohio State making the NCG, they could have taken West Virginia also.
USC-West Va would have been an infinitely better matchup than USC-Illinois
Not that I’m complaining or anything, their loss is our gain here in the Valley.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:02 pm
174
Bobby Decatur says:
100 cocktails to the Marcus Howard / ‘natty’ reference. Love that kid, and I love reading all of these posts about how Brennan is going to hang 600 yards and Hawaii pulls the upset.
Total Bullshit. Brennan’s head is going to be removed before halftime. Marcus will be the first of many to stop by and say hello New Years night.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:04 pm
175
A Cal bear in SC says:
Shomar Shabbatz, Donnie! Shomar FUcking Shabbatz.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:04 pm
176
beckett929 says:
165 –
I’m sad the Rose Bowl handed USC that victory… a WFVU/USC game would have been great to a possible prelude next season… Or at least a UGA/USC game wouldve drawn huge… fucking tradition….
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:08 pm
177
Irwin Fletcher says:
I see the UGA excuses for their losing to Hawaii (if it happens) are flowing already. Not motivated, let us play a “real team”, we got screwed, etc. Nut up and try to get it through your collective thick skulls that UGA had no business in the BCSCG this year and should be glad they are in a BCS bowl at all.
UGA had a nice little 6 game run to close out the season, winning over a good not great UF and AU team but also 3 point squeaker over Vandy and a 10 point win over Troy. A #4 ranking and a BCS bowl birth should be considered “Christmas come early” in Athens.
I normally pull for any SEC team while bowling but but over the past few weeks seeing how the UGA nation handled their modicum amount of success has me pulling for the big tattooed upset. fuga
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:08 pm
178
finals week sucks says:
@ 156, 158
First of all, I am quite offended by your comparison of me to a stapler. Staplers make a hell of a lot more sense than I do, no need to drag them into this.
I’d agree with you both if it had happened once, then they were trying to get in to the NCG among a bunch of one-loss teams. However, a team’s supposed to improve over the course of the season. Not only that, the team now knows that they are going to get the opponent’s best shot each week, and should prepare accordingly.
If you get the #1 spot back again, you should be good enough to keep it at that point. Otherwise, you blew your chance. LSU wasn’t good enough, and in my opinion shouldn’t have yet another chance at the title.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:11 pm
179
bdogg says:
Did anybody happen to catch Hawaii Coach June Jones argument for Colt Brennan to win the Heisman? According to him Tim Tebow is an average QB that is a product of the “UF system”, while Brennan is a exceptional QB and not a product of the Hawaii system. Check the stats: Hawaii strength of schedule (when combining Div 1 and Div 2) 223 out of 235, right between Sacred Heart and Montana State. UF is #4. It seems to me that Hawaii’s system is to rack up big numbers playing the weakest possible schedule.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:20 pm
180
stapler says:
Awww, Irwin Fletcher, I’m sorry we were bad sports about getting shafted out of the MNC. Please, please, please pull for us to beat Hawaii. We need your support. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry about everything.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:21 pm
181
notthequarterback says:
155 -
Do/did you go there or just live in the state? One thing I won’t argue is that your state (and conference) produces the hotter chicks. Makes me wish I had done a few things over about 10 years ago.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:25 pm
182
tOSUBuckeyes says:
So Illinois to California to play USC at home; Ohio State to Louisiana to play LSU at home, and Michigan to Florida to play the Gators at home…gotta love the bowl season.
For those bashing Ohio State’s schedule I offer you this:
USC has beaten 2 teams with a winning record and played 1-11 Idaho, 5-7 Nebraska, and 3-9 Notre Dame OOC. Those teams are a combined 9-27.
Ohio State played 6 teams with a winning record and played teams OOC with a better combined record than 9-27.
Lastly, Notre Dame is 2-1 against the Pac 10 and 0-4 against the Big Ten, including Purdue and Michigan State.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:29 pm
183
AZDuck says:
173 – Blame your own conference for not having a top-tier bowl game in Michigan or Ohio.
Oh, wait, nobody wants to spend late December in Michigan or Ohio? Go figure.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:32 pm
184
Will says:
Is LLLLoyd coaching Meatchicken against Florida?
As someone that hates Florida, I hope that one goes out like Alvarez’s last game (when Wisky upset the Aubbies). But given the UM D’s track record this season vs. mobile QBs, it could be 40-0 UF at halftime.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:32 pm
185
notthequarterback says:
175 – Yes Lloyd is coaching. And UF is going to score a ton. It’s just a matter if we can hang with them. If Henne is healthy enough to play and play well, I think we can. Otherwise, it’s gonna be ugly.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:34 pm
186
SEC Get Over Yourself says:
Seriously, SEC geto over yourself. Yes, your conference is good, top to bottom it is better than the Big 10. But I am so tired of the SEC homers saying that tOSU will get worked by LSU. tOSU puts in plenty of fast players into the NFL, and many of their skill players are from either FL, NJ, or somewhere outside of Ohio. I am tired of hearing how slow they are. They are just as fast as SEC players, it’s all about execution. Last season, they did not execute and were beaten by Florida. This year is a totally different ball game. SEC fans are forgetting who LSU’s coach is, Les Freaking Miles. A guy who almost blows the Auburn game, not to mention a guy who cannot even pronounce Arkansas. He’s totally aloof, for most of the game. I will take the sweater vest over Les any day of the week. SEC, remember General Sherman and his boys rolling through your neck of the woods about 140 years ago tearing down all of your shotgun shacks. The same thing will happen January 7th, Buckeye fans will be pillaging the south. They’ll make Katrina look like an afterthought.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:35 pm
187
AZDuck says:
Oh Christ – don’t make me whip out my Big 10 sucky OOC slates again.
Instead I’ll just say that OSU is more deserving of a slot in the BCS title game than USC (1 loss better than 2 losses)… but if you think that USC would not completely manhandle OSU on a neutral field, well, you’re a silly person.
And yet, Idaho, Nebraska, Notre Dame are all members of 1A. Can the same be said of tOSU’s OOC competition?
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:36 pm
188
tOSUBuckeyes says:
Just saw the ESPN game changing performance nominees…all 4 of them were from the SEC…I wish ESPN would just become the SEC network and make it official…
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:36 pm
189
This Is Your Captain Speaking says:
Wait a second…split title?
Fuck that shit. If Auburn didn’t get one in 2004, the fucking leghumpers sure as hell aren’t getting one this year.
Mahalo, bitches.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:38 pm
190
bnb614 says:
re: Illinois in the Rose
Actually, considering the Rose picked *before* the Fiesta due to Ohio State making the NCG, they could have taken West Virginia also.
USC-West Va would have been an infinitely better matchup than USC-Illinois
I disagree, especially after seeing WVU v Pitt. They didn’t play anyone this year. I think the Zooker and Illinois will give USC a way better game than Rodriguez and WVU would.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:44 pm
191
dougls says:
oh, great more katrina jokes…
northern people are just a classy bunch…
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:52 pm
192
bama_buck says:
Woohoo! Bama bowls in Shreveport two years in a row.
As a Bama fan living in Athens, who likes the Dawgs, Hawaii is scary.
Better not take it lightly.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:54 pm
193
Thor says:
Wow, bigots from Ohio, who knew? You sound like Saban, what are you 12 and you just learned about the Civil War so you think it will piss southerners off? Just wow.
December 2nd, 2007 at 10:57 pm
194
Thor says:
Hawaii will probably beat thUGA. When you let the inmates run the prison, they decide who to get up for. If UGA would have played Oklahoma or USC they would have got up and played great, but put them against Hawaii or Illinois, or Kansas? They will be full of themselves and think they can win just by showing up. Hawaii is going to jump on them early and might win that game.
December 2nd, 2007 at 11:00 pm
195
NMS says:
If you really think the inmates run the prison at UGA you are nuts. Richt suspends guys from games for getting drinking tickets. He let em charge the field once in a huge game. Whoop dee doo. who cares that a few extra guys were on the field after a score
December 2nd, 2007 at 11:03 pm
196
Mr Pelican Pants says:
Well one things for sure….Les Miles HATES tOSU….
so this will be his warmup game….beating the hell outta tOSU at LSU for the MNC, and then going to Michigan to do it again next year….
If you watched his interview and if he was coached by an agent….technically he will be coaching LSU next year, til Jan 9, win or lose…..
With one whole month near about to get healthy….LSU will put on a display likened to that of Florida’s win last year….
December 2nd, 2007 at 11:03 pm
197
Mr Pelican Pants says:
What I love about Les Miles…ALL OF HIS SENTENCES ARE 4 WORDS OR LESS….and
tOSU is 0 AND 8 vs the SEC….not my facts….its relative history….My God Oklahoma is gonna kill WFV…..Florida will kill Michigan……….The curious matchup is Ga vs Hawaiii……Hawaii can score, they run a fast break offense much like the Celtics, and unless Ga can get a pass rush under 1 sec and their DB’s are from Ethiopia, it could be a long day since Hawaii will simply score faster than Ga….Pellini is Nebraskas new HC and Dorrell gets canned
December 2nd, 2007 at 11:12 pm
198
Thor says:
Charging the field? Is that all? You must not be paying attention. What about gloating on Vandy’s field after a last second win? What about all the dancing on the sidelines? You look like Miami used to.
December 2nd, 2007 at 11:16 pm
199
Al the Bartender says:
So June Jones thinks Tebow is an “average passer” and a “system quarterback”?
June, take a drive. That underpass you hit was your toughest opponent in the last two years (aside from alcoholism)
December 2nd, 2007 at 11:17 pm
200
D-nice says:
Missouri doesn’t get a BCS bid because they had to play a team twice.
Not one, but 2 teams, Illinois and Kansas, get BCS bids and Missouri beat both – convincingly (don’t let the final score of the Illinois game fool you).
I’m and Illinois fan, but still think that’s wrong.
December 2nd, 2007 at 11:21 pm