CURIOUS INDEX, 11/28/07


Les to worry about for Michigan (abominable puns being his chief gift to college football copy writers) as with Kirk Ferentz out, the job searchlight focuses directly on the beaming white skittle of Les Miles' hat. Miles is still mumming about the question and instead pawning the press off with stories of his daughter, who evidently takes no shit from dad when it comes to losses.

After the shattering defeat, Miles said no less an authority than his youngest daughter, Macy Grace, told him, "Dad, I'm mad at you because you lost." Miles said he tried to reason with the tot, letting her know he "was still the same Dad," and trying to make her understand blood is thicker than scoreboards.

In addition to Miles occasional mismanagement of the clock, this should concern Michigan fans even more. Scoreboards are made of steel, metal, and diodes, all clearly thicker than weak, watery blood!

This leaves the only other serious contenders for the Michigan job--after two interviews with assistants Mike Debord and Ron English--as Brian Kelly and, in the random possible stack...Jeff Tedford? That's just something pulled straight from the crazy idea box, but it's out there. Michigan would have no problem with stadiums built on a faultlines or hippies in the trees, since Ted Nugent is legally allowed to shoot on sight anyone he chooses in the state and have them prepped and ready for the grill in 15 minutes. Tastes like patchouli and lentils, brother!

Rice's band continued the tradition of private school excellence in band snark by staging an entire halftime show around the treachery of Tulsa coach Todd Graham's departure from Baylor for his current job, following a fictional search for Graham through the circles of hell and passing Dennis Franchione along the way. Really, the entire thing validated itself with the unnecessary and superb jab at Franchione; however, it rocketed into new territory with its ending.

You know, that reminds me of a joke: A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. Now, I forgot how the rest of it went, but I think in the end Todd Graham is a douchebag.

Tulsa reacted as we big, burly, super-tough Americans do: they filed a complaint. FUCK YEAH!

Randy Shannon is reinstating the Miami standard by revoking the salaries allegedly cutting six players' scholarships from the team, including that of scatter-armed qb Kirby Freeman. Miami Sports Blog thinks it has something to do with a pulse of gifted Miami Northwestern recruits coming in for early enrollment. We think it has something to do with Miami sucking hard and often for the second half of the season.

This week's to-do list is up at the Sporting News.

TRADITION! Please give Joel the hits he so richly deserves by checking his full explanation of how the Vols managed to wobble their way into the title game, but we'll go ahead and with his permission bite the Youtube he put together of Tennessee's Fiddler on the Roof act to get them there. Phil Fulmer dancing with a mule is involved.


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