IT'S A REGULAR SHED SCENE OUT THERE

by Orson on Nov 27, 2007 10:50 AM EST

Bloodbath does not describe it: this year 12 coaches have been canned in all, leaving behind a trail of tears, moving vans, and discarded coffee makers and dry-erase boards unseen since the great de-coachening of 2002.

It brought to mind one scene and on scene only: a vision of violence and force so appalling it almost earned the now-retired X rating, a demonstration of primitive, pre-CGI prosthetic and blood hydraulics so obviously fake and awesome it set the bar for an entire generation of young gorehounds...a depiction of oiled Austrian rage bent on saving the only thing that really mattered to America, Alyssa Milano...yet another example that the only qualification for being a movie henchman is to shoot wildly from the hip and possess zero ability to react to your situation...

Yes, we're thinking of the shed scene from Commando, the most awesome of awesome scenes from a movie packed to the gills with steroidal excellence. And right now, the demands of war-painted fanbases are speaking with ze thickest of akk-scents und doing ze keeehling, mah freund.

Standing ovation to LSUFreek, who put this together at our behest. ONE HUNDRED COCKTAILS to you, sir.

Tweet Comment 21 comments | 0 recs |

Do you like this story?

Comments

I don’t get how that’s a bloodbath. 119 coaches, most coaches have tenures under 10 years, should be a good amount of firings and hirings every year. I think this year may be more bloody because winners are getting canned, which is more unusual.

by Brian on Nov 27, 2007 11:06 AM EST reply actions

The crazy sack of weasels presser last night left no doubt that his departure was not a firing, not a resignation, not forced out, not a mutual agreement, or anything like that. It was a nice campfire scene complete with smores, warm cider; and everyone was reminiscing over a good coon dog that had to be put to sleep.
It wan’t anyone’s fault; just one of those things.

by drogue on Nov 27, 2007 11:09 AM EST reply actions

Gary Barnett got more coaches fired than any one person in 1995 & 6. If Northwestern could win, anyone can win was the thinking by AD’s across the country. This year just has some higher profile openings like Michigan and Nebraska for starters.

by Crabapple Buck on Nov 27, 2007 11:10 AM EST reply actions

Wow!
That is a thing of beauty. Only thing missing is the sound………“Stick around, Bennett”

by Derrick in SD on Nov 27, 2007 11:12 AM EST reply actions

First movie young jebus ever rented. I watched it 4 times in that 24 hours. Those were halcyon days.
Let off some steam, Bennett!
Indeed.

by jebus on Nov 27, 2007 11:17 AM EST reply actions

I don’t think Lloyd belongs in there, since he retired instead of being killed by Ahnalt.

by Dave on Nov 27, 2007 11:24 AM EST reply actions

This is just a natural extension of the Mao Boathouse season.

by Herb on Nov 27, 2007 11:34 AM EST reply actions

I poured out a lil Old Charter for The Orgeron last night.

He shall live forever in all of our minds and hearts…

by Billy in Baton Rouge on Nov 27, 2007 11:42 AM EST reply actions

Lloyd would still be on the jet, ‘sleeping’ soundly.

by Allahver Fist on Nov 27, 2007 11:44 AM EST reply actions

callahan’s face is fucking priceless.

“can my friend have a pillow?? he’s ‘dead’ tired.”

by gerry dorsey on Nov 27, 2007 11:51 AM EST reply actions

I didn’t know that Beau Bridges was in Commando… huh, learn something every day.

by gej on Nov 27, 2007 11:53 AM EST reply actions

That clip is priceless!

Well played sir!

by Paragon SC on Nov 27, 2007 11:56 AM EST reply actions

where was Fran….

oh wait… he probably didn’t have any good expressions to use for this…. just that little half smile smirk while he was getting beat…. again. probably doesn’t work well… actually i figure he’ll die w/ that smirk on his face.

by cjjags on Nov 27, 2007 12:02 PM EST reply actions

Holy shit, that was brilliant.

Also, people who would post on this comment thread about how ‘that really isn’t that much turnover’…umm, you’re missing the point.

And the point is that However many coaches actually are getting shitcanned, it inspired this phenomenal clip. Stop being geeks.

by Boston Nick on Nov 27, 2007 12:03 PM EST reply actions

That was fantastic. Well played LSUfreek, well played sir

by NDEddieMac on Nov 27, 2007 12:41 PM EST reply actions

Couldn’t buy it. If The Orgeron was the one doling out the punishment, then I’d buy it. No way even a fully buffed Ahnold lops off O’s arm, at least not without getting eaten.

Re: the magnitude of the bloodbath, it’s not so much the absolute numbers, but that: 1.) So many have happened so quickly; 2.) Some of them involved winning coaches; 3.) Some of them involve big name schools; 4.) It ain’t over.

by HFS on Nov 27, 2007 12:50 PM EST reply actions