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November 20, 2007

FERENTZ?

In a rumor that would make almost no one happy: is Kirk Ferentz a candidate for the Michigan job? Reeeeeeeeaally?

Filed under: Big 10 Conference, Coaches, the BCS, scandals, arrests, and other eccentri, College football by Orson Swindle

[ 41 Replies ]

41 Responses to “FERENTZ?”

1

dave says:

(In best Norm Macdonald as Burt Reynolds voice):

“Yeah, that’ll work.”

November 20th, 2007 at 10:19 am
2

Scalz1 says:

For the love of all things sacred ……. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

November 20th, 2007 at 10:21 am
3

Rival says:

Hey, Michigan: want an offense more staid and sedated than your own?

The only more sleep-inducing choice I can think of is Chan Gailey, and that zzzzzzzzzzzzzz….

Wha? Huh? Oh, sorry, even typing Chan Gailey’s name makes me sleepy.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:21 am
4

Coop says:

You don’t seek this job. This job seeks you.

Riiiiiiiiiiight, Chief. Have you noticed that schools like Notre Dame, Ohio State, etc have not ended up with their first pick in recent coaching searches?

Delusion is a wonderful state to reside in for enjoyment, but not necessarily for practicality purposes.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:21 am
5

Orson Swindle says:

“You don�t seek this job. This job seeks you.”

Kind of like a fuck lion. You don’t seek it…it seeks you.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:23 am
6

gerry dorsey says:

ohio state chuckles….big blue nation prepares molotov cocktails.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:28 am
7

PeteJayhawk says:

Stoops as a candidate at Michigan is as ludicrous as OBC as a candidate for TAMU.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:34 am
8

OhioDawg says:

If he gets it his agent goes directly to the agent hall of fame.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:39 am
9

Allaha says:

When was the last time Michigan had a black coach?

I hear Dorrell is on the market.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:42 am
10

Biggus Rickus says:

The Maize and Blue likes their football like they like their sex. Tried and true and unchanged since 1963. Hail to the missionary.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:43 am
11

Pants McPants says:

Ooooh, but it would make ME happy….So happy….

November 20th, 2007 at 10:44 am
12

chairLegInEyeSocket says:

How can you imply that Ferentz to UM would make nobody happy? We’d be thrilled.

signed- the rest of the Big Ten (except Minnesota)

November 20th, 2007 at 10:46 am
13

WhiteSpeedReceiver says:

I prefer the Bielema to Michigan rumor I heard.

November 20th, 2007 at 10:48 am
14

Mr Pelican Pants says:

Yes Yes Yes…the SEC implores you to do this…
LLoyd Carr isnt a fan of Les Miles since the recruiting debacle when a guy committed to Michigan then reneged and went to LSU….plus Lloyd retired this early on purpose, just to put the pressure on Les Miles to watch him squirm while the Michigan job is dangled right in front of his eyes, just outta reach, nothing he can do about it til the end of the year, knowing full well he wont leave LSU now, and Michigan wont wait…just to have the job go to………..
Kirk Muthfuckin Ferentz………..Lloyd Carr is secretly high five-ing himself after watching Les Miles tearfully deny, while his heart is being ripped from his chest, that he has to “let it rest”……Lloyd Carr is an evil evil man and I am sure he left this somewhere: Note to Les Miles:

Ha! Ha! I handed the keys to Ferentz, and you would have gotten this job if it wouldnt been for you meddlin with my kids…
Signed,
Lloyd “This is what happens when you fuck your friends in the ass” Carr

November 20th, 2007 at 10:58 am
15

UgasTexan says:

Good point, #9. Exactly how many black HCs are there in the Big 10? How many have there ever been? Was it just Bobby Williams?

November 20th, 2007 at 11:01 am
16

NativeSon says:

13
Now THAT would be the ultimate Coaching-Fuck You. Here’s hoping it’s true.

November 20th, 2007 at 11:03 am
17

rusty says:

Pelican @ 13, if that’s true, then that’s the most warped, frustrated, bitter, cynical, salting the earth on your way out action ever committed by a college coach.
In other words, it fits Lloyd to a T.

November 20th, 2007 at 11:03 am
18

Out of Conference says:

The hint of smugness in Ann Arbor at being able to get any coach they want reminds me of T-town last year.

November 20th, 2007 at 11:05 am
19

Techie says:

Ryan Leaf says: “I think Chan Gailey’s offensive system could be a sure winner at UM”

November 20th, 2007 at 11:09 am
20

rusty says:

Also, Hayley LaFontaine is really upset to hear this. She thought that mean man Les Miles was finally going to move away and leave her alone. Looks like he’ll be in the backyard, drinkin’ bourbon and calling her out on subpar baton twirling for the forseeable future.

November 20th, 2007 at 11:25 am
21

Hoosier Chuck says:

HELL @ DA NAW!!!

MICHIGAN’S MAN IS….

CAM CAMERON!

seriously, they might be that dumb up there….

http://www.detnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20071020/SPORTS0101/710200330/1126

November 20th, 2007 at 11:27 am
22

MassDad says:

#14 Beautiful! Even more so because it’s so believable. One “Michigan Man” screwing another, how poetic!

November 20th, 2007 at 11:28 am
23

Big Hoss says:

The shine is off Ferentz, folks. To his credit, he parlayed three very good years into being the single most overpaid coach in sports today. But now he is essentially a .500 coach and his players are better known for their arrests than for their on-field accomplishments. Three of his players are now staring down the barrel of a possible rape charge, and there’s even talk of a cover-up from Ferentz, the Iowa athletic department, and university administration. Why not just hire Gary Barnett and get it over with?

November 20th, 2007 at 11:41 am
24

Jeff says:

#15 – We (Northwestern) have had two – Dennis Green and Francis Peay. Green was fine, Peay, um, not so much.

November 20th, 2007 at 12:00 pm
25

HFS says:

I think this would make Iowa happy, at least.

November 20th, 2007 at 12:05 pm
26

bnb614 says:

LLLLLLoyd didn’t announce now so Les would be in a tight spot. Hell I think either Les gets it or they go with a no-name coach (a la Tressel) that has success at a smaller program that can make the same happen at Michigan. I think Carr did it now so recruits wouldn’t be wondering and so the search can happen before teams starts to lock up coaches..

It won’t be Jim Harbaugh, that much we know. But Lloyd isn’t going to plan an announcement around trying to screw Les. Give me a break.

November 20th, 2007 at 12:10 pm
27

bnb614 says:

I don’t think Stoops is as far fetched as some people seem to think.

November 20th, 2007 at 12:15 pm
28

jebus says:

I hate to see him leave, but I’d love to watch him go.
Listen, he rebuilt our program and we really appreciate that. He’s also taken the last 3 years off and we couldn’t possibly buy him out so I say this with much love, fly like the wind, Kirk. Go. I wish you the best. And for the love of all that is holy, take Ken O’Keefe with you.

November 20th, 2007 at 12:19 pm
29

tOSU_radar says:

I think Les Miles is the last kitten in Carr’s bucket.

November 20th, 2007 at 12:19 pm
30

Mr Pelican Pants says:

#26
Its at least Diabolical….do you think Michigan interviews anyone or just gives it to Miles? I mean does Michigan have any patience, or do they jump the gun? Miles knew when he took the LSU job, Lloyd was gonna retire w/in the next five yrs, hence the Michigan buyout clause in his contract, therefor at least giving him a shot….in a weird way, you know this is torture for Miles, his school, his “dream” job, he and his wife’s Alma Mater, romantically linked for them, where it all began………….where it could all end for them retiring in Ann Arbor……..and it goes to a non-Michigan man………ouch…….if they dont wait…..I’d like to know what Michigan fans want (dream candidate) vs what they need. Is Miles the best Michigan can do? If not Miles, who’s the best fit?

November 20th, 2007 at 12:54 pm
31

michael says:

Thanks to Mr. Pelican Pants, and the greatest line I have read here,

Lloyd �This is what happens when you fuck your friends in the ass� Carr

I have coffee sprayed all over the floor.

Well, the cleaning crew actually thanks you.

November 20th, 2007 at 1:10 pm
32

SpartyDave says:

Pondering the sort of “Michigan Man” who’d be pure catnip for the striped ties in Ann Arbor, one name came a-wafting over my mental transom: Bill McCartney. Heck, he’s only 67! Check ‘em off: coached for Bo, legendary straight arrow, has the “McCartney’s Monsters” sound byte from U-M’s glory days ready to re-heat. Could maybe bring Sal Aunese’s kid along as team manager or something.

November 20th, 2007 at 1:21 pm
33

Hawkeye State says:

Echoing jebus @ 28.

If you love someone, set them free. So go already.

The usual Iowa suspects have all more or less flamed out when taking the step up (Mike Stoops, Chuck Long), so there wouldn’t be such a push for an old Iowa player. Which means…

Please, please make this happen. Ferentz to Michigan, Brian Kelly to Iowa. Oh how sweet it would be.

November 20th, 2007 at 1:25 pm
34

Dave says:

The shine is off Ferentz, folks. To his credit, he parlayed three very good years into being the single most overpaid coach in sports today.

Charlie Weis would like a word with you.

November 20th, 2007 at 1:57 pm
35

skinnyphatman says:

Shouldn’t it be –

Lloyd “this is what happens when you meet a soilder in the alps” Carr?

November 20th, 2007 at 2:12 pm
36

bnb614 says:

Its at least Diabolical�.do you think Michigan interviews anyone or just gives it to Miles? I mean does Michigan have any patience, or do they jump the gun? Miles knew when he took the LSU job, Lloyd was gonna retire w/in the next five yrs, hence the Michigan buyout clause in his contract, therefor at least giving him a shot�.in a weird way, you know this is torture for Miles, his school, his �dream� job, he and his wife�s Alma Mater, romantically linked for them, where it all began��.where it could all end for them retiring in Ann Arbor��..and it goes to a non-Michigan man��ouch��.if they dont wait�..I�d like to know what Michigan fans want (dream candidate) vs what they need. Is Miles the best Michigan can do? If not Miles, who�s the best fit?

Mr. Pants, I definitely don’t think it is diabolical. I don’t think the announcement was timed to hurt Les.

#1 Lloyd already stated he will not have a major role in picking his successor, but would give feedback.

#2 At the press conference Lloyd said he told the AD after the Oregon game that this would be his last year.

I think they were honest when he said he picked this day to announce so it wouldn’t affect regular season ending, or bowl games, or recruiting. Plus any coach that is getting feelers from other schools know this is out there.

I don’t think Les is a done deal but I think they will be patient and wait for him to get to where he will talk. I mean for all we know, he is not talking to them yet but his agent is. So I don’t think there is torture for him. If they came out and said “we can’t wait for Les so we are going to hire XX” yeah that might kill him. But I don’t see that happening.

I think Brian Kelly at Cincinnati is probably in the mix.

It will be interesting to see who gets to the finals of the job.

November 20th, 2007 at 3:00 pm
37

bnb614 says:

Excuse my horrible use of italics to bleed Pants’ comments in with mine.

November 20th, 2007 at 3:00 pm
38

Hokie Andrew says:

That would make The ‘Nati an internship program for coaching jobs in Michigan.

November 20th, 2007 at 3:20 pm
39

Jonsi says:

#10, you are so wrong. Michigan is very open sexually. After being a TOP for a decade, they decided to see what it was like to be a BOTTOM against tOSU.

November 20th, 2007 at 3:29 pm
40

wvjgrad69 says:

I nominate Bill Clinton, who could be a Michigan man if you asked him to be.

Or Al Gore, who is as big an offensive lineman and isn’t doing much now that he’s got the whole global warming thing solved.

November 20th, 2007 at 5:53 pm
41

Stagecoach67 says:

Jebus @ 28

Ferentz is the only name I am familiar with from the Iowa staff. That said, and knowing how your season has gone, I assume Ken O’Keefe is the Offensive (literally) Coordinator?

November 20th, 2007 at 8:26 pm