CAPTION CONTEST: LOUIE THE LUMBERJACK
by Orson on Nov 19, 2007 4:37 PM EST
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PrintWe can't stop thinking about the Northern Arizona University mascot, Louie the Lumberjack, and this picture. There's a hypothetical conversation going on here between Mr Unawares on the left and the horrified cheerleader on the right, and we want to know what it is.
Cheerleader 1: Hey, what the hell was that noise?
Cheerleader 2: Holy fuck, he's loaded the t-shirt gun with broken glass.
Louie: I AIN'T GOIN' BACK TO JAIL, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!! (BOOOOOOOOOM!)
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OH SHIT!!! He’s hit The Orgeron, we’re all dead meat – RUN FOR IT!!!
by yoyofutbawl on Nov 19, 2007 4:48 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1: I can’t believe Mangino hired us to shoot ring dings into his mouth
Cheerleader: Stop talkign and fire
by RUinsane on Nov 19, 2007 4:56 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1: I can’t believe Mangino hired us to shoot ring dings into his mouth
Cheerleader: Stop talkign and fire NOW DAMMIT NOW
by RUinsane on Nov 19, 2007 4:57 PM EST reply actions
Well at least he’s not humping a piece of maritime memorabilia.
by Captain Awesome on Nov 19, 2007 4:58 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1: Look! In the air! Is it a bird?A plane?
Cheerleader 2: No, a lame duck!
Cheerleader 1: Can’t be… Houston Nutt never goes to the air.
by Professor Gundlach on Nov 19, 2007 5:04 PM EST reply actions
[Threadjack]
Stewart Mandell now has a 9-3 [TEAM REDACTED] playing as the Big Televen’s at-large pick in the Fiesta Bowl.
Discuss.
[/Threadjack]
by Geaux Irish on Nov 19, 2007 5:07 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1: There’s something very important I forgot to tell you.
Louie: What?
Cheerleader 1: Don’t cross the streams.
Louie: Why?
Cheerleader 1: It would be bad.
Louie: I’m fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean, “bad”?
Cheerleader 1: Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
Cheerleader 2: Total protonic reversal.
Louie: Right. That’s bad. Okay. All right. Important safety tip. Thanks.
by Chips O'Toole on Nov 19, 2007 5:08 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader #1: Dude i’m so taking this thing next time I go golfing…
Cheerleader #2: FORE!!!!
by Cameron Siggs on Nov 19, 2007 5:20 PM EST reply actions
Louie: Say Hello to my LITTLE Friend!
Cheerleader #2: oh. my. god. NOOOOOO
Cheerleader #1: did he just say what i think he said?
by Cameron Siggs on Nov 19, 2007 5:23 PM EST reply actions
#13: It’s believable, in that the Big East isn’t getting two teams and there’s a good chance the ACC isn’t either. If Hawaii loses to Boise, there may not be any other options – remember, there’s a limit of two teams per conference. Two from the Big XII, SEC, and Pac-10 (given Dixon’s injury, this could well end up being AzSt and USCw!) are probable, but that only gets us to nine teams.
by SpartanDan on Nov 19, 2007 5:28 PM EST reply actions
From left to right: Cheerleader Bruce Dickinson, mascot Louie the Lumberjack and cheerleader Lance Berk moments before the tragic boomerang gun accident.
by Biggus Rickus on Nov 19, 2007 5:40 PM EST reply actions
I was going to try to come up with something, but I don’t think I can beat #14.
by carlinthemarlin on Nov 19, 2007 5:54 PM EST reply actions
Louie: CAN I AXE YOU A QUESTION
Cheerleaders: AW NAU HELLZ NAU WHAT
by Yinka Double Dare on Nov 19, 2007 6:12 PM EST reply actions
Louie: Getchew some! automatic fire Getchew some!
Cheerleader #1: How can you shoot wimmen and children?
Cheerleader #2 snaps pictures
Louie: What?!?!?
CL #1: I said, how can you shoot women and children?
Louie: It’s easy! You just don’t lead em as much. Get you some!
by LSUJoshua on Nov 19, 2007 6:15 PM EST reply actions
Dude, you see that blond with the big tits in the upper deck, i’m gonna nail her.
by formerlyanonymous on Nov 19, 2007 6:24 PM EST reply actions
Yes, this is my swedish made penis enlarger.
by formerlyanonymous on Nov 19, 2007 6:26 PM EST reply actions
Ok you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This… is my boomstick! The 12-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart’s top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That’s right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It’s got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That’s right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You got that?
by Allen on Nov 19, 2007 6:37 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1 says " My dad was the inspiration for the Will Farrel charcter on SNL." “Oh yeah?” says Louie. “My dad was the original Phoenix Gorilla”. “Thats nothin…….My dad was the machine that made Stuart Scott’s eye all wonky” says the t-shirt cannon
by yak on Nov 19, 2007 6:46 PM EST reply actions
Quit standing around with your mouths wide open!!! Or you’ll be sorry… that is if I can ever get this freakin’ penis pump to work, dammit!
by bamaman181 on Nov 19, 2007 6:52 PM EST reply actions
This just in:
The masot for the National Arab University, aptly named “Mohommed Jihad” will be suspended for 2 games after shooting down three of the four F-16’s during their pre-game flyover….he was quoted as saying “he would have gotten away with it, if it would have been for those meddling infidels”
by Mr Pelican Pants on Nov 19, 2007 7:05 PM EST reply actions
or this one if they play Oregon:
“That duck wants to starts some shit, I gots somethin’ for his ass.”
by Mr Pelican Pants on Nov 19, 2007 7:08 PM EST reply actions
Louie:
Dude! Check out what happens when I set this thing to Gravity Hammer!!! Holy Shit!!
by Mr Pelican Pants on Nov 19, 2007 7:24 PM EST reply actions
“Why is a meatball with a humanoid body firing an t-shirt gun dood?”
by Brian on Nov 19, 2007 7:46 PM EST reply actions
old and busted: lumberjacks with axes
new hawtness: flamethrowers
by vegas_buckeye on Nov 19, 2007 8:23 PM EST reply actions
Faramir: AIIIEEEEE!! A balrog!!!
Frodo: Quick, Gimli, your axe!
Gimli: No time for that, we’ll just have to pressure-wash ’im to death!
by slap-of-WAC on Nov 19, 2007 9:34 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 2 to Cheerleader 1 ….
“did I hear that lumberjack say something about urine bombs?”
by Futbawl Fan on Nov 19, 2007 10:34 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1: Hey is that Lee?
Cheerleader 2: Heyyyyy Corso! Want a shirt?
Louie: Shut the fuck up, Lenny. Gary, load up the axe. That fucker’s dead in the water.
by Cooker on Nov 19, 2007 11:21 PM EST reply actions
“Break yo’self, fool!”
or
“I keep this around for close encounters.”
by MCab on Nov 20, 2007 1:45 AM EST reply actions
There are some good sports on here…BUT…as I have always told my players when they used vulgar lanuage..like MF….“Is that the best you got”…“is your vocabulary so SMALL that you have to use gutter words?”…..I got that quote from the great coach John Wooden ….when I started coaching in the 60’s. There is no real reason to say F*** let alone MF…just MY thots as an old coach of 35 years.
by Mike Walker BS,MA on Nov 20, 2007 7:34 AM EST reply actions
Minus 10 points to the Lumberjack for sporting Ug boots.
by Geaux Irish on Nov 20, 2007 9:08 AM EST reply actions
Mike Walker BS,MA,
I beg to differ you fucking douchebag. See, it has more bite with the “fucking” included.
by Biggus Rickus on Nov 20, 2007 9:13 AM EST reply actions
“This is a great plan! I’m excited to be a part of it.”
by Wes_d00d_02 on Nov 20, 2007 9:57 AM EST reply actions
Biggus is fucking right. Which is fucking rare for a fucking Dawg, but none the fucking less, I have to give him mother fucking props for it when he is, the fucker.
It’s like scrambled eggs. Sure, they are good plain, but a little spicy salsa brings them to a whole new level of slap yo momma good.
by Out of Conference on Nov 20, 2007 10:07 AM EST reply actions
Right (right), I’m fucking well right
I got a fucking right to say
Right, I’m fucking well right
You know I got a right to say
Uh huh, I’m fucking well right
Yeah I got a right to say
You, you don’t care anyway
by Biggus Rickus on Nov 20, 2007 10:38 AM EST reply actions
Mike, could you possibly be any more pompous (listing your degrees after the name, name dropping, saying you’ve been a coach for so long)?
As for cussing … sure, you don’t want to go overboard, but for occasional emphasis in the right company (and a college football blog certainly qualifies), where’s the problem?
by SpartanDan on Nov 20, 2007 10:42 AM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1: Holy shit, he just blew that guy’s head off
Cheerleader 2: with what?
Cheerleader 1: looked like double aught shot
Cheerleader 2: shit, I should have known there was no “ball bearing giveaway” today
Cheerleader 1: man, I thought that when we took away the real axe, we could cut down on the in-game body count.
Cheerleader 2: whoever thought that having some psycho tree-chopping flannel-wearing murdering gimp as a mascot would be a good idea?
Cheerleader 1: We’re going to have a hard time finding out; did you see what he did to the AD when he tried to fire Louie after the pee-wee massacree at homecoming?
Cheerleader 2: Did I see it? I had to get new shoes afterwards. What the hell is wrong with this guy anyway? What makes him liquidate the fans?
Louie: I blame society.
by DC Trojan on Nov 20, 2007 11:02 AM EST reply actions
Cheerleader #1 : Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid. Chewy, show him your blaster!
Lumberjack ( in a Chewie type voice): “Rahhhnnnrrrrrrrr!”
Cheerleader #2 : Well, Goooolllleee!
by DeepInOhio on Nov 20, 2007 11:06 AM EST reply actions
Giving the Song Girls a super size money shot!!
by titanhulk on Nov 20, 2007 11:15 AM EST reply actions
The voices in his head told him to do it. Katchem, kill em.
by DHC on Nov 20, 2007 12:49 PM EST reply actions
Cheerleader 1: How do you like my new Colostomy Cannon?
Mascot: Was there sausage in your breakfast burrito?
Cheerleader 2: Oh God…Oh…God…I think I’m going to puke…OhJesusOhGod…
by prehensel on Nov 22, 2007 2:55 AM EST reply actions
Louie: I’m Joe Grizzly, bitch!
or
Louie: I’ll fuckin’ kill you then show up at your funeral like it’s nothin’….
or
Louie (unforgivable voice): Bitch, my t-shirt cannon, you face…
by Bobby Light on Nov 23, 2007 1:36 AM EST reply actions
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